Page 28 of A Montana Secret Admirer (Sagebrush Ranch Sweethearts #4)

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

Despite how unsettled everything felt right now, Reese knew he needed to help Serenity through whatever it was that was on her mind. She was just as stressed as he was, and he had a feeling it had more to do with him than anything else.

He didn’t want to look too closely at the fact that he’d pushed her into something she wasn’t ready for. He wouldn’t be surprised if she felt cornered by him.

And the last thing that she would want to hear right now was that he had an opportunity across the country that would split them up for one year—an opportunity that he wished he didn’t have to consider.

Part of him was so tempted to ask her to come along with him. He wanted her to be there with him every step of the way. But how would that work? He didn’t know if she had a job or a plan for when the summer was over. That was the sort of thing he should have figured out by now.

Dang it! What was he doing?

Reese dug his hands into his hair as he stood on the front porch of the house she shared with his aunt, uncle, and cousins. He was here to ask her out on a date so they could forget about all the issues that hung over their heads like a storm cloud.

She’d be leaving back home, which wasn’t the end of the world.

It wasn’t far enough that they couldn’t visit one another.

There was a little bit of hope in that outcome, actually.

But Serenity didn’t know about the opportunity that Bo had figured out for him—an opportunity that was too good to pass up.

Unless she asked him to stay.

He’d do that for her.

Deep in his soul, he knew he would drop everything if she asked him to.

That was how deep his feelings had become.

Was he a little crazy? Perhaps. But that was what love did to a person.

He wanted Serenity in his life. He wanted her to come to him when she was stressed.

He wanted her to lean on him when she had to make a hard decision. He wanted it all.

Every last little thing right up to her boys.

The molten heat in his chest seemed to vibrate with the acknowledgement that he would do anything for this family. Even if it meant putting his dreams on hold. He didn’t know when he’d get another chance at doing that training program, but he didn’t care anymore.

Tonight, he’d spend time with Serenity and tell her how he felt. He wouldn’t bring up the training. He’d just lay his heart out on the line and see if she could feel the same for him.

Before he could knock on the door, it swung open.

Serenity froze. Her eyes darted over her shoulder to where he could hear her boys talking to someone in the other room.

Serenity looked breathless as she offered him an apologetic smile and shut the door as quietly as was humanly possible.

Then she jerked her chin toward his waiting truck.

“Let’s hurry before they notice I’m slipping out. ”

He frowned. Did they not know she was spending time with him? “I thought you told them you were going on a date.” She’d said as much in the message to him not thirty minutes ago. He’d been thrilled, to say the least. The boys were finally getting bits and pieces of the truth.

She nodded, rushing past him. “I told them I was going on a date, but I didn’t tell them it was you.”

Reese nearly stumbled on the steps coming from the house.

He wanted to ask her why she wouldn’t have just told them the whole truth, but he couldn’t bring himself to do so.

She couldn’t be embarrassed. Boys were curious, and they surely must have asked.

There was only one reason she might have kept it from them.

They didn’t like him.

Or maybe it was just Tegan. The kid had seemed more closed off lately.

Serenity made it to the truck before he had a chance to open the door for her. She climbed in, and her wide eyes stayed glued to the house as she fidgeted in her seat. She glanced back and forth from Reese to the house. And when he got inside, she motioned for him to get going.

The question was on the tip of his tongue.

Why didn’t you tell them about me? But he wasn’t sure he wanted to know.

Reese cleared his throat and did as she requested.

They pulled onto the road, and he put all his concerns in the back of his mind.

He didn’t need to worry about the training program, Serenity’s reasons for being secretive, or what would happen in a couple of weeks when the summer was over.

Right here, right now, he had Serenity all to himself, and he was going to make the most of it.

Reese stared across the table at Serenity.

They’d gone to the best steak restaurant in town.

The rustic decorations and the pictures of cowboys that covered the walls were a big draw not only for tourists, but for the locals, too.

He’d never brought Serenity here, and while she was looking around with interest, she still appeared on edge, no matter how much she was trying to hide it.

“I’ve been thinking a lot about what it means to be happy.”

He looked up from his food with surprise at Serenity. They’d talked about everything, from what her hometown was like to how her boys were doing with their riding lessons. This was such a sharp change in subject that he hadn’t been expecting it at all. “Oh?”

She nodded, and the first hint of a genuine smile graced her lips. “I have.”

“And what did you discover?”

That smile widened, and he finally had a glimpse of the woman he’d quickly fallen in love with over the summer.

He put his fork down and gave her his full attention.

She absentmindedly traced a finger along the rim of her glass, dropping her attention to it instead of him.

“I think that everyone has to decide what happiness means for them. No one knows what it could be.”

“True,” he murmured.

Her eyes lifted to him. “It could revolve around a place, people, a job, an experience…” Her voice trailed off, and he couldn’t help but think about how being with her was what made him the happiest of all.

Maybe it wasn’t wise to put all his joy on an individual, but that was where he was at.

Heck, he didn’t care about that training program nearly enough if he was willing to walk away from it if he had a chance to be with this woman.

He’d find another way to do what he wanted with his life.

Reese swallowed hard and reached across the table to take her hand, the one that had been fiddling with the glass. “And what is it that makes you happy?”

Her eyes darted to him then away. The lighting was dim in the restaurant to add to the ambiance of the place, but he could see a faint blush creep across her features.

This was it. She was finally going to admit what he knew to be true for a couple of months now.

They had been falling in love. And he could be the person to make her happy again.

Serenity chewed on her lower lip. “My family makes me happy, of course. But there’s more to it than that.”

He leaned in a little closer. She was holding back. Was she worried that he didn’t feel the same? He could tell her. Right here, right now, he could tell her that she was his happiness.

But something held him back.

Reese didn’t know what it was, but something tugged at him in the back of his mind. This wasn’t the time or place to confess his feelings. They were on the brink of something great, and she needed to be the one to tell him how she felt before he slammed into her with his own confession.

She finally looked up at him. “I think a big part of finding that happiness is doing things for ourselves—figuring out who we are deep down, you know? Like that training program you were looking into.”

His whole body seized up. Had Jane told her about that program, about the plan for him to leave for a year?

Was that why she seemed so on edge? He wished he’d made it clear to Jane and Noah that they weren’t to discuss this possibility in passing with Serenity—at least not until he had made his decision.

Then again, Bo had made it sound like he didn’t have much of a choice with all the strings they’d pulled for him. He was going. Right now, all Reese could do was tell Serenity how he felt and ask her if she’d be up for a long-distance sort of situation.

He blew out a breath, forcing himself to keep up his smile as he nodded. “Yes, dreams are important.”

She smiled as if that was the response she wanted to hear. “I think after losing Finn, I got to be in a rut. I wasn’t living anymore. I needed to find a reason to live besides my sons.”

Reese straightened in his chair. This was it. Now she’d tell him that he was part of that reason.

Serenity blew out a shaky breath. “I needed to find something just for me—something to make me feel happy and alive again.”

This time, his smile seemed to cling to his face with only the smallest amount of resolve. Something just for her? What did that mean?

“You found something to make you happy, and I’m going to do the same.”

He squeezed her hand, another confession in his head screaming, demanding to be let out. You make me happy, Serenity.

“I’m sorry,” she murmured, pulling her lower lip back between her teeth. “I’m probably not making any sense.”

“It makes perfect sense,” Reese murmured, squeezing her hand in reassurance. His confession clung to his tongue like a bitter, sticky mess. He wasn’t sure she wanted to hear it. Reese closed his eyes tight then blew out a breath. He would tell her tonight. But now was not the right time.

They finished up their meal, then picked up dessert for themselves and the boys from the bakery. It was late by the time they made it home. The sun had set, the boys were likely in bed. The house was quiet, and the lights were off.

Serenity faced him when they reached the door, and she grinned at him. “This was nice—going on a date with you for real.”

He reached up and allowed himself to trace the lines of her face with his fingertips. This was what he wanted. The two of them together, out in the open where everyone would know. One step at a time, right?

Wrong.

She had to know. Time was running out.

Reese glanced to where he’d parked his truck, then gave her upper arm a gentle squeeze.

“Wait here for just a sec.” He jogged down the steps to his truck and pulled open the back door.

On the floor, wrapped in a damp cloth and hidden beneath the seat, he’d stashed what he hoped would be the first of many flowers he planned on giving to her in person.

It was a confession all on its own, and he prayed that she’d see it for what it was.

He hurried back to the porch, the flower behind his back.

She stared at him with a crooked sort of smile, confusion and curiosity in her eyes.

When he pulled the flower out with a flourish, time slowed down.

Her eyes dipped to the flower, and her lips parted with surprise.

A myriad of emotions played across her features as the realization dawned in her eyes.

He had a feeling that she suspected him, but she’d never asked outright.

Well, here was the proof that he was exactly who she likely thought him to be.

“You make me happy,” Reese whispered, handing the flower to her.

Serenity’s eyes darted up to meet his, and she let out a breath. “Reese…”

He didn’t have to tell her he loved her. He was showing her just how much he cared for her simply by showing all of himself. It was the most vulnerable he’d ever been, and he wasn’t sure he’d be able to handle it if she chose to push him away for keeping this from her.

It was true he’d never lied to her, but he felt like he’d kept a secret that might have helped their little relationship along.

Serenity took the flower with trembling fingers and whispered his name again.

Then she threw her arms around his neck and kissed him hard.

The intensity of this kiss was something he’d never experienced before.

She was giving herself over to him, not holding back.

They could make this work. No matter how hard they thought things could be, he knew without a shadow of a doubt that Serenity could love him enough.

The door to the house swung open so quickly that it was almost soundless, but the gasp of shock was what yanked the two of them out of their passionate embrace. Serenity spun to face the door where Tegan stood.

Shock morphed to disgust then fury as his eyes bounced from his mother to Reese and back. His small hands balled into fists, and tears brimmed his eyes as his face turned a bright red color.

“Tegan—” Serenity started toward him, but Reese took her hand.

Out of desperation or something else, he couldn’t be sure, but he couldn’t let her go, not like this.

Her sharp stare shifted from where he held her to his face.

The conflicting emotions he read in her eyes said it all.

She cared for him… but she needed to think of her children first. “Reese, I’m… sorry… I have to…”

He released her like the touch of her skin burned his. He blinked back his own terror and emotion as she took a step away from him. Then resolve flooded his veins. “I can come, too.”

“No.” Her response was sharp, biting, and it made his head rear back with surprise.

“But—”

“He’s my son, Reese. I need to handle this.”

The words she didn’t have to say out loud were more than clear. You’re not part of this family. You don’t have any power here. He doesn’t belong to you.

Would he ever?

The knot of pain in the back of his throat continued to grow. All he could do was nod and take a step back. She didn’t tell him that she’d call him. Nor did she promise that they’d finish what they’d just started.

Tegan took precedent, and he understood it completely.

What about her own happiness? He couldn’t figure out where she was about that. Maybe she wasn’t ready to think about it after all.

And where did that leave them?