Page 20 of A Montana Secret Admirer (Sagebrush Ranch Sweethearts #4)

“I know,” she muttered, but even so, she shook her head.

“When we chose—Finn and I—that I’d be staying home with the children, we hadn’t been expecting…

” Her voice cracked, and she huffed out a sad laugh.

“For heaven’s sake. This doesn’t matter.

It’s certainly not worth getting bent out of shape over. ”

“It’s fine,” Reese insisted. “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. I was just curious.”

She looked at him, her eyes shining with emotion.

“I’ve been living off his life insurance policy for the time being.

I… I just haven’t been thinking that far ahead.

I figured there would be time to hash it out, but lately, all I’ve been doing is going through the motions. One day at a time and all that.”

“Of course.”

Her smile was a sad one, and it made him want nothing more than to jump from his saddle and pull her into his arms. She heaved a sigh and reached to tuck some hair behind her ear, but there was none.

“I think I’ve been ignoring thinking about it too hard because I don’t want to take something away from Jessi.

Tegan got to have me home all through his childhood.

He’ll go to school in the fall, and it won’t matter what I’m doing at home or at work while he’s there.

But Jessi? I think he would struggle if I put him in daycare. ”

“That’s a really hard decision to make.”

“It might not be a choice no matter what,” she sighed again. “I can’t live off of what I got from Finn’s death forever. I’ll need to find something. I just don’t know what.”

“There are a lot of work-from-home gigs these days. Is there anything you would feel comfortable doing behind a computer?”

Serenity shrugged. “I don’t know. Like I said, I never finished college. All I really have is my high school diploma.”

“Maybe one of these days, we can sit down and see what options there are. I’m sure we could come up with something. And if not, then it wouldn’t be the end of the world if you had to find a job. Just make sure it’s something you like. That’s what’s important.”

“No, I think having the money to put food on the table would take precedence.”

Not if you were to marry me . The thought was almost too easy. And definitely too hard to keep to himself. He’d known she was special from the moment he’d met her. And the more time he’d spent with her, the more he knew he wouldn’t regret asking her to marry him.

Not ever.

Instead of blurting the one thing capable of scaring her off, he shrugged. “It’s been my experience that mothers specifically are resilient. And you’re no exception.”

“Thank you, Reese,” she murmured.

They made it to their destination, and the second the pond came into view, Serenity gasped. He knew she’d like this little piece of paradise. It didn’t exactly fit in the rough and tumble backwoods of Montana, but here it was.

He climbed down from the saddle and moved to her side. Her eyes were locked on the pond, and recognition was clear in her expression. Her lips were parted with shock, and if he wasn’t mistaken, there were tears gathering in her eyes.

Her focus jumped to him as he lifted his arms in an offering to help her down. But she didn’t reach for him. Instead, she asked, “What flowers are those?”

Reese didn’t have to look. He knew exactly what flowers she was referring to. “I don’t know. Lotus, I think?”

Slowly, her focus shifted to the pond again.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought.” The statement was made more to herself than him.

He thought for certain she’d bring up the flowers she was receiving from her secret admirer, but she didn’t do that, either.

She pursed her lips together then reached for Reese so he could help her to her feet.

They spent the next several hours chatting and eating. He pulled out his guitar and strummed on it while she went through the books he’d brought and picked one. Every so often, she’d look over to the flowers in the pond nearby.

He smirked to himself as he got to his feet and plucked one from the water. “You like them?” Reese handed it to her.

She nodded, not speaking. His confession was on the tip of his tongue.

He could do it, too. Just lay it all out for her and tell her that he was the one behind the notes and the flowers.

But there was one problem with that. He had no idea how she felt about the flowers.

He’d been a little forward in the last note, too.

Reese settled back beside her and picked up his guitar again.

The rest of the afternoon passed without incident.

As did the ride back to the ranch. When he walked her toward his cousin’s house, he slowed.

She appeared to notice and glanced at him with curiosity.

She tilted her head so her eyes met his.

He reached for her hand, his thumb tracing over the back of it. This date had been just as good if not better than the first. The kiss they’d shared had been electric, and that was how he’d wanted to end tonight.

“Reese?” she whispered. “Everything okay?”

“Today has been great,” he murmured.

She smiled. “It has.”

“And I really want to kiss you.”

Her eyes widened. Maybe she was surprised that he wanted to. Maybe she was surprised that he’d admit to it so openly. It didn’t matter. He couldn’t be sure if she wanted it as much as he did or at all.

Reese forced himself to continue. “I know that you’re taking things day by day—slow makes sense, and I would never ask you to do something that you’re not ready for. So I’m… going to go.”

“What—”

“Before I do something that we might regret. I’m going to ask you out again. And again. And again until you tell me no, or…”

“Or?” she breathed.

“ Or .” He said it like it was a statement and smirked at her. Then he lifted her hand to his lips. “Until the next one, Serenity.”

He turned to leave and got only six steps before he heard her call out to him.

“Reese, wait!”