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The ways to answer Alec’s question filter through my mind, but my mouth says, “Thank you for bringing the great work they do here to my attention.”
Alec’s jaw tightens, but before he can say anything, Joanne calls out.
“Oh good, Alec, you’re still here.” Joanne hands him a card and a pamphlet. “Here’s the contact information for our sister program, The Alliance Center, that works in rural areas. The name is more discreet, but most queer kids recognize alliance as friendly.”
Alec takes the information with a perplexed expression and says, “Thank you,” as a question.
“Of course. The decision is yours.” She pats his shoulder as she walks away.
“That was weird.” Alex’s perfect eyebrows arch up.
My face must give away my guilt because Alec asks, “Von, are you going to explain?”
“I overstepped. I’m sorry.” Relief courses through me because he doesn’t seem upset. “I was so impressed, I asked Joanne if they have these programs in rural areas because you might be interested in that. I should not have said anything.” Feeling lightheaded from talking without breathing, I gulp in air.
Alec stares at me in silence.
“I’m sorry,” I say again lamely.
“You keep repeating yourself.” Alec tilts his head to the side. “That was thoughtful, Viking.” He taps my arm with the pamphlet as he strolls past me toward the exit.
I stand there like an idiot.
“It’s late. Go home, Viking,” Alec calls without turning around.
He’s not mad, and he called me Viking. Although this isn’t how I hoped the night would end, it’s a start. That thought confuses me––the start of what?
I wonder if doing good things for selfish reasons negates the good deed. If longing for Alec’s sunshine and company means I’m self-serving and incapable of doing philanthropic acts.
But I’m really wondering when I’ll see Alec again and if I’m stalking him.
Chapter eighteen
Alec
Shane appears in the doorway of the stockroom. Obviously, Cole sent him to check on me. I only spare him a glance as I continue to count boxes of antiseptic wipes.
Shane sighs. “Listen, I can’t pretend to make small talk in an effort to figure out what’s going on with you. You’re hiding back here. We both know the inventory program I set up will calculate this at the push of a button. We’re worried about you.”
I shrug. I’d talk to Shane or Cole if I knew what to say. Everything hit at once. Mads fucking me over regarding my ex, my parents trying to give my inheritance to my sister to ‘keep it in the family,’ and Von treating me as the enemy, then confusing me with aloof stalker vibes. I’m not sure I can trust Von’s motives or his intentions.
“You haven’t tried to seduce me in a week. Did you hit your head?” He mimes smashing his head on the door frame.
I shrug. Von must be rubbing off on me with my shrugging and nodding.
“Is it something your parents said or did? Cole is ready to drive upstate and knock some heads.” He steps closer.
Shane’s kidding, but I crack a smile. Having friends willing to fuck shit up for me is oddly comforting. “Nah. They’re assholes, but I can handle it.”
“Good for you. If I never have to see my parents again, it will be too soon.” Shane’s body starts vibrating with anxiety.
“Am I interrupting?” Cole looms in the doorway, freakishly sensing Shane’s distress.
“Dammit, Cole, five more minutes and I would’ve had him.” I nudge Shane with an elbow and wink.
Shane rolls his eyes and steps into Cole’s arms. “We’re going to dinner. Join us.”
“Thanks, but I’m meeting Em out tonight. I’m introducing him to Mads and Jayce. He used to play hockey, and I thought he might want to play in some of the pickup games. One of these days, I’ll get you out on the ice, Shane.”