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There was a seemingly endless maze of corridors to navigate my way through the pristine corridors of Seven Virtues Hospital. I let out a rush of air when I burst into the late summer evening. Even though the touch of fall hasn’t brushed the Asheville region yet, I still hug myself to ward off a chill.
Twisting, I shoot a fulminating glare at the building behind me—as if the inanimate object can absorb my fury from the past mingled with my present wrath. “God, I hate this place. All it does is try to suck the life out of those that I love.”
A twisted image of my mother’s face being drunk by a straw extended from darkened skies as her eyes fixated on mine was interrupted as a nameless face fights being wedged into the same glass container that resembled the collection of Galileo thermostats at the bar. Something is shouted at me I can’t understand.
But even as it tried to take the life of my mother, warmth steals through me as Ethan’s brawny arm slips around my waist. Waves of comfort crash over me, reminding me that despite the fact I can’t share the details, I’m not alone. We gravitate together, he to offer comfort, the only thing my promise to the woman I love will permit him to in these desperate moments.
Contact, touch.
Love.
I didn’t need words from him because I knew he was there for me at my best and worst, and this was certainly shaping up to be my worst. After all, what prepares you for the imminent crumbling of the strongest cornerstone of your world?
Grabbing his hand, I drag him away from the scene, racing around straws plunging down from the sky—each of them trying to jab us in the head—ready to drain one or both of us of our souls. Reaching my car, I urge him to get inside. I slide in effortlessly before I start the engine.
Only to find him not there.
Is it a sign I should betray my mother’s wishes?
CHAPTER FORTY-NINE
I refuse to be remembered in death as someone who didn’t bring people joy. From now on, this is where you can come to for your music news.
—@PRyanPOfficial
Until you get dumped again.
—@CuteandRich3
“Mama, please,” I beg.
For as frail as she is, the determination in her eyes doesn’t waiver. “No. I don’t want the Kensingtons to know.”
Tears prick my eyes. “I swear to you, I won’t ask them.”
“I refuse…”
“I don’t plan on asking Austyn for money. I...I just…”
“You just what, Fallon? You know that the first thing she’s going to do is tell her mother.”
“Not if I tell her not to!” I shout.
My mother goes on as if I haven’t spoken. “Then the family will offer to do what they can to wipe away our burden. As if the money is what concerns me at this point.”
Something in my face must alert my mother. Her expression turns caustic. “I told you already that if the hospital tries to hold you liable, the life insurance will cover it.”
“I know.”
“Then what is it?”
God, I can’t believe I’m having to have this conversation with my mother. Surging to my feet, I storm over to the window and stare out at the campus of the Seven Virtues University from my mother’s hospital room. Knowing I have precious few minutes before my mother’s doctor comes in—Dr. Smyth being notorious for his punctuality—I note the clock on the tower is still three minutes slow. God, how many days was I late to class because I relied upon the massive clock in the bell tower. The whimsical thought comes and goes as I rub my forehead with my fingers while trying to break through the pride my mother wears like a superhero’s cloak, even now.
As a single mother, she taught me to hold onto my pride at all costs. “Fallon, the strongest commodity you’ll ever have is your pride—the knowledge you accomplished your dreams without relying on another person.”
While I tucked her life lesson next to my heart, along with everything else she wanted me to learn, the agony of knowing I have little time left with her is making it hard for me to hold on to my sanity, much less my precious pride—both of which I’d easily give up to know my mother would live.
Still, I made her a promise—a promise she needs to release me from. Since she made it so I couldn’t go to the Kensingtons for money and I instead took the job at Devil’s Lair to offset her medical costs, I haven’t shared anything about her medical condition. I’m alone as I absorb the insidious pain of my upcoming reality. Sure, a few colleagues at Devil’s Lair are aware of it, but it’s not the same as having Austyn to lean on as my world shatters.