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“I’ve been thinking…”
She interrupts. “You’re repeating yourself.”
“A sign of my age.”
“Again, that’s dangerous.”
I ignore her. “About how it might affect things. Our dynamic, how people see us...” When she says nothing, I trail off, uncertain about how to vocalize the concerns clawing at me.
“Ethan?” Her voice is a balm to my nerves.
“Yeah?”
“Is this about what other people think or what you think about us?”
Offended, I bellow, “I’m not questioning us, Fallon.”
“Are you certain?” That’s when I hear the first hint of vulnerability in her voice since we became an us.
“Christ, witch, I’ve wanted you since the night of your high school graduation. Do you think waiting for you has been easy?”
Her amusement and her acceptance cleanses something in me I didn’t know felt dirty until she teases, “In between your sexcapades?”
“They were before you, Fal. And once I admitted to myself how I felt about you, there hasn’t been anyone since.”
Her breath is audible. “When was that?”
I set aside my pride and admit, “The night of Austyn’s party.”
“Right when our texts changed.”
“Yes.”
“Why didn’t you make your move then?” Fallon’s frustration is evident.
“Because I needed to be certain some rising douche nozzle wasn’t going to come in and sweep you off your feet.”
She chuckles through her tears. “Listen, I understand your concerns. But age has never been an issue for me. I care about you, not the number of years between us. And second…”
“There’s a second?”
“Yes. This is the one and only time I want to discuss it.” She pauses for emphasis. “There have been boys, an occasional man. But none of them were you, Ethan.”
Her words started out like nails on a chalkboard and immediately turned into a ballad. “Thank you,” I tell her sincerely.
“For?”
“For your unwavering honesty. Still…”
“Still what?”
“I can’t shake this feeling that there’s something trying to wedge its way in between us.”
Her voice is quietly powerful. “I get your concerns. But if you want to pursue this, us, realize I refuse to let something as trivial as age and distance stand in the way of something I have wanted since I was eighteen.”
Her words hit me like a revelation, and I comprehend just how lucky I am to have her in my life. “You’re right. I’m sorry for throwing up obstacles where we don’t need them.”
“Don’t be. Just focus on us, on what makes us happy. The rest will fall into place.”