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Within minutes, my mother sits down on the ottoman as I huddle, knees to chest. I’m home because the last place I wanted to be was at school. I had to have a safe place to expel the emotions swirling inside me since that party. Anger surges through me, making my muscles tense. “I refuse to weaken at a time I’m supposed to grow into a woman of strength.”
My mother grips my fingers. “Then what do you want to do, sweetheart? Do you want to leave school? Take a year to regroup?”
“Yes. No.” Silence follows my confusing response. I feel the pressure of my mother’s hands, the comforting scent of her perfume wash over me. In the bubble of peace she’s created for me, an idea comes to me. I consider it, twisting it around in my mind before I give it voice. “What if I were to transfer?”
“Fallon, these kinds of problems may occur at any school,” she logically points out.
I concede her point before pointing out, “But, Mama, you know I struggled to decide where I should go. I went with having a built-in friendship and proximity to home over my future ambition.”
Her eyes widen fractionally. “You’re thinking of transferring to Seven Virtues.”
“Think about it. It’s less than an eighth of the student body. It has the major I want?—”
“Something you would need to go to another university for graduate school if you remained at UT.”
“If I find an off-campus apartment, I can declare residency after a year, so I’ll only need loans for out of state tuition for a year.” I quake at the idea of taking out a loan for that amount, but I won’t let that deter me. This feels right—the first thing that does since that fateful night spent puking.
My mother tugs my fingers. “What about Austyn?”
I open my mouth and snap it shut. That’s the major crimp in my plan—explaining to my best friend I need to leave UT. Then I voice my last concern. “Truthfully, I’m more worried about leaving you here alone.”
My mother pushes to her feet. “Give this a lot of consideration, Fallon. Then, once you’ve had a discussion with Austyn, we’ll talk some more.”
Staring into nothing, I realize the next move is mine if I want to stop worrying about my immediate future.
“You’re not the only one thinking about leaving.” Austyn takes my announcement with surprising ease. I should have expected no less from my best friend, but I’m stunned by her counter. After all, she’s made a huge name for herself as a DJ on campus. Her plans have always centered around music. She’s a damn prodigy, able to pick up any instrument and play it at an expert level.
Not to mention what she can do behind a sound booth, I think with pride.
Right now, we’ve slowed our horses to a walk through the sunflower fields behind her family’s farm, discussing our next steps. “I’m not?”
She shakes her head, causing her braid to swish back and forth. “I’m putting together a plan.”
Curious, I rein in so I can concentrate on what she’s saying. “For Paige to send you to a different school?”
She snorts. “I want Mama to cash in my college fund so I can move to New York and try DJ’ing full time.”
My jaw drops as my mind explodes in shock. I’m unable to formulate a reply until Austyn asks with more than a hint of amusement, “Should I use your reaction to gauge Mama’s? You think it’s a bad idea?”
I walk my horse as close to hers as I possibly can and lean to the side so I can grab her arm. Tugging her close, I rasp, “It’s the best damn idea you’ve ever had. You’re going to set the world on fire, Austyn.”
“Come with me. New York has some of the best museums in the world. We can still live together. Both of our dreams can come true.”
I contemplate my words carefully because a part of me wants nothing more than to go with her to maintain the connection we’ve had since I moved in across the street. “Seven Virtues is one of the best schools in the country for what I want to do, Austyn. If they accept me for a mid-year transfer, that’s the path I need to take. I thought I could go about it a different way, but I think we both found out that was a mistake.”
“Understatement of the century,” she mutters.
“Austyn, I have to tell you something.”
“What’s that?”
“If I knew then what I know now, I might not have gone with you to Austin.”
“What?” She screeches so loudly, our horses begin to shift beneath us.
After we get them settled, I explain how I found out that if I go an extra year to school, their accelerated master’s program feeds directly into the Biltmore Estate. “My dream, Austyn.”
“I know.” Her head lifts and I can’t miss the tears on her cheeks. “So, this is it? This is where we end?”