Page 106 of Not How I Saw That Going

“Oh, hello.” The woman freezes when she sees me.

I’m just as immobile. Wait, that’s Chief Barns’ wife. I remember her from the many meals and events she’s been at supporting the fire station.

“Hi.”

Her brows furrow. “Ward?”

“Lisa,” I nod.

A smile the size of a perfect cut of watermelon grows on her face. “Right, you’re the Prince Charming. Sorry, I almost didn’t recognize you with a shirt.” She smiles at me.

“Excuse me?” Did I just squeak?

“Oh, don’t mind me. You treat her like a princess tonight, you hear?”

My hand goes to my tie again, but I pull it back down. “Yes ma’am.”

Her smile disappears, and she narrows her eyes. “Don’t blow it.” With that she turns and saunters down the hall.

Don’t blow it.No pressure there.

The door didn’t shut behind her, so now I’m left standing outside the open doorway like an idiot. I can hear Lyndi and Maddie talking somewhere inside, and the TV is playing cartoons, likely for Crew, but I can’t see anyone. Do I close the door and knock to announce my arrival, or just let myself in? I’ve been inside enough, it’s not like I’d be intruding. But my unexpected encounter with the chief’s wife has left me out of sorts.

Maddie rounds the corner, her arms stacked to the brim with what looks like hair and makeup supplies. She sees me and jumps so high everything in her arms comes crashing down around her.

“Holy sh—” she screams, but cuts herself off before her words are heard by impressionable ears.

I rush over, feeling responsible for the mess.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” I say, reaching for the endless brushes and pins, and whatever the heck these weird squishy eggs are.

“Then maybe don’t stand in the doorway like a creep,” she exhales, and a strand of hair blows up with the air.

“I assure you, that wasn’t my intention.”

“Good to know this was the first offense.” She rolls her eyes and stands up with her arms full. I pick up the last item, something that looks like smashed scissors, and follow her to the counter.

“Lyndi is just finishing up,” Maddie says.

“Okay.” I put my hands in my pockets and wait. Crew must be in his fort because I can’t see him. It’s just me and Maddie, and I’ve never been alone with her. I’ve only briefly met her at the soccer games. What’s an appropriate subject for small talk?

Maddie turns on me. “Do I look fat to you?”

Not that.

I am a stone wall. If I move, everything will shatter. This is every man’s worst nightmare and I have no idea how I got here.

My mouth opens, but nothing comes out.

“Oh my gosh, I am!” she squeals, and then there are tears. Everywhere.

I’d like a do-over on the last five minutes and for someone to please,for the love, tell me what’s going on.

“Maddie,” I say hesitantly.

She refuses to look at me. “I only had two pieces of bread!” she wails, chucking make-up items haphazardly into her bag. “Six years down the drain just like that.”

I’m so lost.