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“What, a dream within a dream? That’s fucked up, even for me.”

Clint chuckled. “True, but you’ve never been quite right in the head.”

“Thanks.”

“I mean, look at you. What the hell have you been doing?”

Sean frowned. “Freezing my ass off, you?”

“Being dead.”

Sean’s shoulders sagged, averting his eyes. “I’m sorry.”

“For what? Because I died? We all knew there was a good chance one or all of us could die at any time.”

Sean’s face scrunched up, chest aching. “You died because of me.”

“Because you didn’t predict the bullet in time? Because you didn’t have some psychic premonition that my death was waiting for me at the next volley? C’mon, Sean. You always talked about how death was waiting around every twist and turn. How’s this any different?”

Sean looked down at his feet, shrugging. “I never meant...you guys. I never wanted it to be you guys.”

“Oh, so you meant you were going to be the one to die. Is that what this is, survivor’s guilt?”

Sean jerked his head up. “You weren’t supposed to die!”

“But you were?”

“I—”

“See, that’s your problem. A stray bullet happens to catch me just right, and you’re what, going to spend the rest of your life blaming yourself? This team needs you, Sean, our team. Just because I’m dead doesn’t make that any less true.”

Sean shook his head, clenching his eyes shut. “I don’t...don’t know how.”

Clint pushed himself up from the wall, walking over to Sean. “You do.”

“Really? Because I’ve been trying for months, and I haven't done shit but make it worse.”

Clint knelt before him, resting his hands on Sean’s knees. “No, you’ve been punishing yourself for months. Maybe it’s time to stop blaming yourself for what you can’t help. Maybe it’s time to stop pushing everyone away because you’re terrified you’ll screw up again. Because you didn’t screw up, Sean, it was my time, whether that’s fate or just the way the cookie crumbled. Either way, you can’t keep beating yourself up and making others suffer for a sin you didn’t commit.”

“We...miss you,” Sean said.

Clint reached up, cupping Sean’s jaw. “I know, and I miss you guys too. But it’s time you keep doing what you do best, what we did best.”

“But—”

Clint shook his head. “You really think me being gone stops that? You know damn well your new guy is as good as me and maybe even better.”

Sean frowned. “Not better.”

“And how would you know? You’ve been so caught up in wanting him gone you haven’t paid attention to shit. Well, other than his naked body.”

Sean’s eyes widened. “You?—”

Clint laughed. “Yeah, maybe I do know about that. And maybe I know that’s not such a bad thing either. Maybe it’s time, like I said, to stop beating yourself up and let other people back in. You tried giving your life for the guy. Maybe it’s time you let him be a part of your life.”

“This sounds like some rom-com movie speech,” Sean muttered, leaning into his friend’s touch.

“Romance him or don’t, dude, that’s up to you. All I’m saying is, whether he’s the love of your life or a trusted team member.Stop punishing him because I died. And stop beating yourself up because I died. It’s nobody’s fault.”