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HERE WE GO AGAIN

It’s been six years since Oscar left, leaving me with a broken heart. It was hard at first, but I’ve got my life together. Working as a medic at Fort Dale and enjoying the nightlife nearby Port Dale—things are pretty good.

But now he’s back. The same guy who walked away because he was too scared to come out is walking right back into my life.

He still stands by his decision to leave, but that doesn’t stop him from kissing me. Now, I can’t tell if I want to kiss him again or knock him out for daring to make me feel something for him again.

I can’t tell if I love or hate him if I never want to see him again, or never lose sight of him. Six years wasn’t enough to forget my anger and love, and I don’t know what to do.

Is this a second chance at happiness or just another opportunity to have my heart broken?

OSCAR

Looking at the pile of boxes, Oscar took a deep breath and wondered where to start. The movers had already brought in the furniture and assembled everything before he’d arrived. It was disturbing, looking at everything he had left in the world shoved into boxes. There wasn’t as much as he’d thought.

Then again, he hadn’t kept a lot when he shipped out for Basic shortly after hitting eighteen. His brother had held onto some things, but most of what he had in his new apartment was what he’d accrued during the past six years. That time had been split between deployment and being allowed back to the States to visit family and friends.

And now he was at Fort Dale. Possibly for good.

Snorting in annoyance, Oscar ignored the boxes and scoped out the rest of the apartment that would be his new home indefinitely. The offer of his new position at the base had come from the man in charge, General Winter. It had been passed along to Oscar as he’d consigned himself to his fate, wasting away on his brother’s couch. He still wasn’t sure what the general wanted with him or why he’d been picked to work out of Fort Dale, but it was still better than waiting for anyone to figure out what desk he was going to be parked behind.

Oscar stepped around the boxes and down the hallway leading to the rest of the apartment. His steps were sluggish, his hip twinging from the effort. The limp was a gift from an IED, and apparently, they hadn’t been able to remove all the shrapnel from his hips while they’d been fighting to save his life. Surgery required more recovery time, and Oscar was happy to limp around for a few more months before lying in bed and waiting to get better all over again.

The bedroom was empty save for the massive bed against the far wall beneath the only window. There was no dresser, but Oscar never used the damn things anyway. That’s what closets were for.

He would have to put sheets and pillows on the bed and probably get around to hanging a few pictures. Oscar had never bothered to do much decorating in the previous apartments, telling himself there was no point when he’d be shipped out again. It was strange and sat uncomfortably in his head to know he’d probably be at Fort Dale long enough to set up an actual home.

Sighing, he pulled his phone from his left jeans pocket and checked the time. He had an appointment to check in with General Winter in an hour. With his hip slowing him down more than usual, he would need more time to get ready, walk to the meeting, and still be a little early.

He shuffled into the bathroom, wincing against the all-too-bright light. He made a note to buy a dimmer bulb. Oscar gazed in the mirror, a frown creasing his face.

His dark hair was shorn close and looked perfectly respectable. Although there were dark circles under his brown eyes, making them look even darker than usual, he was used to them. His uniform was tidy, without any wrinkles or stains, and besides the slight stubble on his cheeks, he was presentable.

But he still wasn’t used to his arm.

Oscar stared at his right arm in the mirror, or rather his upper arm and half an empty sleeve. Along with even more scars than before and the shrapnel in his hip, the IED had taken half his right arm with it. From the elbow down, there was nothing, and every time he caught sight of it, or reached for something instinctively with what had been his dominant hand, or felt the strange itching of a limb he no longer had, what little good mood he had plummeted.

Before he grew too morose, his phone buzzed in his pocket. Tearing his eyes from his mangled reflection and pulling his phone out, he saw his brother’s picture and name flash across the screen, drawing a small smile as he swiped to answer the call.

“Gabriel,” Oscar said by way of greeting.

His brother chuckled. “You don’t have to answer your phone like you’re preparing for bad news.”

“Call it force of habit.”

“You might want to get some new habits.”

“You’re right. I’ll go out and find myself a yoga class, maybe take up meditation, and become a vegan.”

Gabriel snorted. “Aren’t you in a mood today? Hip bothering you?”

“My life is bothering me,” Oscar said.

“So that’s a yes.”

“It’s been a long day, Gabriel.”

“So, I probably shouldn’t mention that Anne and I planned to come see you in a couple of weeks?”