Page 354

“When I kissed you,” Nick muttered.

“When you kissed me,” Matt agreed.

It was ironic that he was struggling with the development rather than Matt. It was exactly what he’d secretly wished for all those years, and having it literally sitting in his lap made him nervous.

Matt cocked his head. “Plus, it wasn’t just any guy. It was you.”

“Which should make it stranger,” Nick pointed out.

“Maybe, if you think about it like that, sure. But I mean, it’syou. I’ve felt good around you since the first time we met. Being around you makes me happy and comfortable; I can be myself. I like hanging around you, doing things with you, and doing nothing with you. I like watching you cook, and you like watching me obsess over new gadgets and programs. I’ve shared a bed with quite a few people over the years, but it’s with you that I sleep best, and so do you.”

“I do,” Nick agreed softly, unable to tear his eyes from Matt.

“So why should anything else be different? I mean, sure, I never thought about it before. Never entered my head. Which is weird when you think about how many times people thought that was happening,” Matt said thoughtfully.

Nick snorted. “I’m pretty sure Aidan still thinks that.”

“Or maybe he’s just been seeing what we weren’t...well, what I wasn’t. I don’t know. What I do know is that being with you, around you, is something I’ve always loved. And if that extends to, like, kissing you, sexual stuff? Sure, fine, okay.”

Nick swallowed hard. “Just like that?”

Matt’s eyes searched his face, smiling softly. “It’s you and me, Nick, just like it’s always been. That’s how I see this, so yeah, just like that.”

Something in his chest cracked, and he reached up, pulling Matt toward him. He felt a shiver run through Matt as their lips met. Nick’s heart swelled when he felt Matt melt against him, leaning into the touch of his hand and parting his lips gently.

“You and me,” Matt repeated. “Simple as that.”

It shouldn’t be that simple, Nick told himself. But it was impossible to argue with such succinct logic, especially when it came from Matt.

And yet, wasn’t there some truth to it? Despite his worried thoughts, everything felt completely natural. Having Matt in his lap felt natural and easy, and kissing him was blindingly new and wonderful, yet somehow comfortable and familiar. It was nothing like he’d fantasized because the reality was so much better.

Matt sat back, pink in the face but comfortable. “You’re going to have to teach me some things, though. That should be pretty obvious.”

“Uh,” Nick choked. “Teach you?”

“Well, yeah. I mean, I know the basics of a blowjob, but I’ve never given one, and I’m going to need to learn,” Matt said, hopping up with a sudden burst of energy. “Especially because, well, I’ve not seen you hard before, but like, I’ve seen it soft, and I felt it earlier. I’m going to need some pointers.”

Nick gaped, even as he felt the blood rush to his groin. “You’re really going to talk about sucking my dick, just throw it out there?”

Matt crouched to dig through the box of decorations. “My dick was just in your mouth and I’ve made out with you a few times. If that’s not the point where you can be blunt, when is?”

“I just…” Nick began, realizing he didn’t know what he wanted to say.

“I know I’ve asked before,” Matt said as he pulled out a neatly bundled string of lights. “But seriously, does butt sex hurt?”

In the span of less than a minute, Matt had gone from talking sweetly to talking about anal. Nick wasn’t sure if he was mortified or aroused and quickly realized he could be both.

Matt looked over his shoulder, frowning. “What? If this is going to be a thing, obviously butt sex is going to come into play, right?”

“Stop saying butt sex, please.”

“Anal?”

“A little better.”

“Fucking?”

“Uh, sure.”