Page 9

“I won’t. I refuse to. I’ll be okay.”
“Good. Now eat your cake. We can watch whatever movie you want.”
“What about a romance?”
“You want to watchthatafter tonight?”
“Fiction is easier. Everyone gets a happy ending there. I know it’s not the same in real life.”
“It’s not.” She turned on the TV. “But it’s okay to pretend for a while.”
As she put on the movie, the hurt that settled over me lifted and I finally felt like myself again.
I was dozing off when Gram’s hand landed on my cheek.
“Do you want to stay here tonight or go home?” she asked as the clock struck midnight.
“Iamhome,” I said sleepily.
She gave me a soft smile and ruffled my hair. “I’ll make up the guest room bed, then.”
Stress always tooka toll on me, more so than I wanted to admit. A few days later, when my next book club meeting came around, I couldn’t shake the pounding in my head and there was no way for me to lead the discussion.
But me being me, I tried to join anyway, but the library lights nearly made my head explode and I couldn’t focus on the book at all.
“Amy, it’s okay if you go home,” one of my fellow members said. I was in so much pain I didn’t even knowwhoit was.
“I want to be here.”
“But you obviously have a migraine,” she said. “No one expects you to push through something this bad. It’s just book club.”
My heart lurched. I wanted to be here more than anything. I didn’t want to deal with the pain that popped into my life whenever it decided to wreck my plans.
“I’ll be back next week.”
“Of course,” she said. “And this time, I’ll lead.”
She sounded excited about it, and I wondered if she would be better at this than me and eventually try to take over the book club. Calvin would have.
“Okay,” I said, despite my disappointment. “I’ll see you next week.”
It took all of my energy to stand and make my way out the door. As it shut behind me, I heard her continue on as if I hadn’t even been there.
The drums in my head reminded me that I didn’t need to be focusing on what was happening now that I was gone. I needed to get home.
I walked numbly through the aisles of the library, face down to avoid the fluorescent lighting. I didn’t notice someone in front of me until I collided with them.
“I’m sorry,” they said immediately. “Wait, Amy?”
I rubbed my forehead. I couldn’t deal with anyone needing me at the moment, even with someone who had one hell of a nice voice.
“Yes, but you’ll have to leave a message.” I jerked a thumb behind me, hoping it was in the direction of the club. “I’m out for the day.”
I rushed past whoever it was before they could say anything. Nausea joined the party and I was glad I left when I did. The last thing I needed was to add public throwing up to the list of reasons why I was the lesser twin.
It wasthe next weekend before I could climb out of bed and get my life back together.
Becks had led the meeting last week, and she’d also sent me a get-well card with a lengthy note telling me about how her dad also had migraines and how he handled them. A few of the members had emailed me telling me to get better, and also that Becks had done an incredible job leading the meeting and that she could take over any time. I wanted to be jealous that she’d done so well in my absence, but she was so nice that I couldn’t. All I could do was plan the next meeting and hope that I wasn’t a disappointment in comparison.