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Just the idea of his words sent me over the edge. “L-Levi, I’m gonna come.”
“Do it,” he dared. “Come while I fill you.”
I did exactly as I was told, and his cock jerked inside of me. I may have slept with other people before, but he was the first to do this.
And I wondered if he would be the last.
“That was ... I don’t know if I have words.”
“We’ll be doing it a hundred more times,” he replied. “Maybe a thousand.”
And in the afterglow of the best sex I’d ever had, I believed it.
Levi deposited me on the couch before returning with a rag. After I’d been thoroughly cleaned and given fresh pajamas, we laid down in my bed.
And as I drifted off, I wondered if anything could ruin this moment.
That was my first mistake.
Chapter Nineteen
When I wokeup with a symphony of misery in my head, I knew my day was fucked. I couldn’t move, or else I’d start crying, and as Levi got up, all I could do was pretend I was sleeping in while he got ready for work.
Cymbals crashed in my head and every beat of my heart sent pulsating pain to every part of my skull.
This was a migraine, and a bad one at that.
It had been a long time since I’d had one with no medicine. When I was younger, more than half of my time was spent either with one or recovering from one. I was never functioning at one hundred percent.
And I had a feeling I wouldn’t be this time either.
A part of my brain was shut off, too busy dealing with the agony. When I finally heard the front door shut, tears gathered in my eyes as I dragged myself out of bed to find over-the-counter medicine.
It probably wouldn’t work, but it was worth a shot. I was clinging to the hope that this was a normal headache, even as all the signs pointed in the other direction.
I took that and drank water before closing every curtain in my room and falling back in bed. After an hour of no relief, I wasfucked.
Both Nancy and Isra wanted to go plant shopping today. Levi had already texted me trying to solidify the plans and Icouldn’t.
There was no hope that he wasn’t going to see me like this, but I couldn’t work out what to say. All I could do was take in one breath after another and hope it abated in any capacity.
Tears leaked out of my closed eyes. I didn’t want to disappoint them. I didn’t want Levi to come home and wonder what the hell was wrong and why I hadn’t answered him all day.
I didn’t want him to see me like this and wonder if I was even worth it.
By the evening, I wondered if I could afford an ambulance. I knew that it would be expensive, but the hospital could give mesomesense of relief so I could think. I’d made it through pain like this before, but I hoped I would never have to again since I was so religious about taking medicine.
Well, I was until Calvin blew up my life.
All Levi had talked about was wanting to have sex again. He probably would want that tonight after car shopping, and I wished I was able to do all of it. Unfortunately, I wasn’t as reliable as I wanted to be. I’d managed to deal over the years, but even now, a migraine would ruin any plans I had.
And in the haze of pain, there was no time for grieving that. There was only misery, both emotional and physical.
An unsung benefit of living alone was that no one had to witness my darkest moments. I’d gotten good at taking care of myself when these migraines hit. So good that I kept a trash can next to me in case I threw up.
I had no idea what time it was when the front door opened, but I knew there was no faking being okay. My only hope was to pretend to be asleep.
“Hey,” he said. “Are you napping?”