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“Can’t you go any faster?” I hit the headrest lightly behind Mase’s head.
Mase stares at me over his shoulder. “And what, get arrested?”
“Oh, shut up.” I groan, sitting back in the seat.
When we get to the United Center, all three of us bail out, pulling our hoods over our heads to avoid the steady stream of rain.
“I’ll send a signal to her phone,” Mase says. “It’ll sound like a beeping or a siren.”
Ami scans our surroundings as she grabs onto Mase, her arm curling around his. “I don’t like this.”
The siren leads us to her phone near a chain-link fence behind the arena by a streetlamp with her wallet. My stomach drops to my knees, I swear. I can barely suck in a breath as my entire body trembles, each step shakier then the next. Reaching down, I pick it up, looking through the dirt-soaked Coach wallet, her ID and credit cards all missing.
What the fuck? I lift my stare from the wallet in my hand up the alley. “You go search that way. I’m going this way.” I nod down the dark alley. My stomach feels sick, and I keep swallowing like it’s going to get better. It doesn’t. I’m worse by the second, physically sick over what I might find next.Please don’t tell me she’s dead. Or he’s dead.I can’t even comprehend that thought, but I have to find her.
Mase reaches for Ami’s hand. “Okay. Meet us back at the car.”
My steps are quick, yelling out her name as I try to see through the darkness, holding up my cell phone like a flashlight. I find nothing.
I hear a yell from Mase in the distance, so I run back the other way, around the front of the arena, and then to the back that faces a row of abandoned buildings.
When I see Mase, his panicked expression gives me chills.
“We found her, but we need to get her to a hospital,” he yells, waving me down. “Right now.” I stand, staring at him. Ami’s near the fence, her phone pressed to her ear, frantically yelling out orders to what I assumed is the police.
But then my stare falls to the ground, where my life is, on the wet pavement, bleeding, curled into herself.
Callie tries to move, her hands cradling her stomach. Reality crashes around me.
“Oh God.” Ami whirls, her eyes wide and a shaking hand pressing to her chest as she hands the phone to Mase. “Leo! Hold her still.”
I shoulder past them toward Callie, who’s teetering in and out of consciousness. When I reach her, I try to say something, anything, but fail—the anger, the resentment, all rolling through me, shakes my bones. Why? Why is this happening to her?
Because of me.
I fall to my knees beside her, one hand supporting her head, the other touching her hard stomach. Her skin is pale, her lips a bluish purple. “It’s okay, baby. I’m here.” Her head twists at the sound of my voice. She keeps her eyes on mine, but there are no words. Tears blur my vision at the look that registers on her face. Fear. Confusion. As hopeless brown eyes drift closed.
“Fuck!” Mase groans, staring at the ground beneath Callie. Blood. It’s everywhere. “Where the fuck are they?”
Pain shoots through every inch of me. Have we lost him? Am I going to lose her too? Gut-wrenching panic moves over me, settling into my veins, pumping my heart full of fear. “I’m sorry,” I whisper to her, holding her close. “Just breathe. I’m here for you.”
* * *
I feellike an animal on the prowl as I pace the waiting room, caged, reliving that helpless look she gave me. I can’t process what I see as she lies here. But I also can’t process what I feel while she’s behind closed doors, and I can’t be with her. Instead, I’m left to my thoughts, the words I left her with, and that fucking look of complete helplessness and despair, fear of the unknown mirroring on both our faces.
Mase stares at me, the same fear in his eyes as he tries to get me to sit next to him. “Sit down,” he urges. “You’re making me dizzy.”
“What if she… or he—” I can’t even finish the thought, let alone say it, still pacing.
I’ve done stupid shit in my life. Some I’ve forgiven myself for; others, they’re harder pills to swallow.
And now, in my moment of weakness, in vulnerability, I’m not sure I can forgive myself for what I said to her tonight, what I know caused her to go out at night in that area. Especially if she doesn’t make it, or he doesn’t.
Time goes by unbearably slow and what seems like hours is really only minutes when a doctor comes out the doors, searching for me. “Mr. Orting?”
I look at the ER doctor, suddenly in his face demanding answers, with Mase beside me. “Why can’t I be back there? Is she okay?”
“A doctor will be with you shortly.”