Page 28 of When We Were Young

Emily

I stand at the foot of her bed, clutching the letters to my chest.

‘What?’ I ask, exasperated.

‘Will Bailey’s my father, isn’t he?’ Liv sits cross-legged on her bed, wearing pyjamas with ‘do not disturb’ printed across the front. ‘You slept with him before he died, didn’t you? It says so in these letters…’

‘You read my private letters and now you want explanations? You’re the one who owes me an explanation.’

‘If you slept with him before he died, then he could be my dad.’ Her voice is shaky.

‘You’ve put two and two together and got five—’

‘Just admit he could be my father!’ she roars.

I’m stunned into silence.

Her forehead’s all scrunched. This must have been eating her up all night.

‘ Scott is your father,’ I say plainly. ‘That’s all you need to know.’

‘But how do you know for sure ?’ she persists.

‘I don’t know what you think you’ve read, but I didn’t sleep with Will before he died.

’ The letters tremble in my hands. ‘There’s absolutely no doubt who your father is.

Now, that’s the end of it. I don’t want to hear any more about it.

And I don’t want you dragging up the past anymore.

I can’t handle it.’ My throat contracts.

She stares at me then looks away.

‘It’s too painful. Promise me. Promise me you’ll stop all this snooping.’ My voice cracks and it’s a moment before I can speak again. ‘Liv?’

Her eyes meet mine for a fraction of a second and she looks down and mumbles, ‘I promise.’

I go to put the letters back in the box, then change my mind. I take the bundle towards the door.

‘Why won’t you talk to me about him?’ Her voice wobbles.

I face her, the weight of the letters heavy in my hands and in my heart.

‘Because it’s all my fault,’ I blurt, a sob catching in my throat. ‘I killed him.’