Page 16 of What I Should Have Felt (Anchors and Eagles #4)

FORD

M y heart hammered in my chest as her kiss crashed against me.

I didn’t hesitate in inviting it. She’d been selfish and mean to me, but she’d also had every right.

Maybe we were making a little progress in repairing the damage that I’d created, and if I was honest with myself, her escalated behavior toward me probably wasn’t having the effect she wanted.

She’d always been more aggressive and assertive.

Which I’d loved. But now? Like damn. Stab me again, baby, ’cause it did the exact opposite of what it should.

I really should see a therapist about that… Getting bricked up when— Nope. I would keep that thought to myself.

She tore the ball cap off my head and tossed it to the floor as I dug my fingers into her hips. For the first time in fifteen years, I let go.

All the control that I clung to for dear life left through the window.

Any fear about someone seeing us together fled with it. As surely as if I’d trained my gun sights on it .

I wanted this.

The fiery taste of her tongue in my mouth and her body pressed against mine shot static up my back.

Panting, she tore away, tossing her messy hair to one side with a flick of her head, and I didn’t wait for her to lean forward again.

My lips were against her mouth again, and my tongue down her throat without hesitation.

My hands slipped around to her back, reveling in the feel of her body beneath my touch.

She leaned into my chest, deepening the aggression that twisted around us.

Whatever this was, battled between being a hate fuck and too much time passing since we’d been intimate, but I wasn’t going to stop and argue about it. I didn’t care. Colette LeBlanc was kissing me in the back seat of her car. I wasn’t about to do anything to mess this shit up.

The constant war in my mind had gone silent.

The grief and regret that consumed my soul quieted when I traced my fingertips across the bottom hem of her T-shirt. It disappeared as she weaved her hands through my hair, rolling her hips against the growing bulge in my pants.

I moaned into her mouth as a quiet gasp released from her lips. My world was turning black. Everything except for my Cher faded into the background as she pulled away from my lips and raised her hands above her head.

With a quick tug, I slipped her shirt off.

Pressing my palms against her bare waist, I took in every ounce of her exposed body to me.

She had more freckles than the last time I’d seen her like this, and I wanted to trace my tongue across each one of them.

I wanted to rip her bra from her body and tear away any shred of clothing separating us.

But she cut my lingering and lustful gaze short with her tongue between my teeth again. Velvet and swollen, her lips worked against my mouth, and my eyes closed as I let myself disappear into the moment.

Ego was left behind, and self-control was on a different continent as her hands slid beneath my shirt and traced up my abdomen. I gripped her hips tighter, begging for more as she rocked back and forth against my hard-on.

Fuck was I—

A shrill, blaring ring shot through the fuzzy state of arousal.

Colette stopped grinding against me, and her eyes snapped open at the same time as mine. Her heart beat erratically against my chest as a cellphone rang again.

“That’s not me,” I said, panting.

She sat back, breathing heavily as she reached behind her. Snatching the source of the noise off the center console, her brows tightened at the sight of the screen and whoever was calling.

Without removing herself from my lap, she tapped the screen. “Azelie?” she said and clicked the speaker button.

“I need you to come get me,” Azelie replied.

“Why? I thought you guys were going to go for a run with everyone after the meeting? Is something wrong?” Colette glanced at me, her brows raised in concern.

“Are you… Are you okay?” Azelie asked in response. “You sound out of breath. I thought you were helping at the restaurant today? ”

I pulled my lips between my teeth as Colette narrowed her gaze into a warning glare.

“Yes, just busy at the restaurant like you said. Tell me what’s going on,” she replied, keeping her eyes locked on mine.

I silently leaned back, letting my hands linger on her waist and not entirely looking solely at her face. The only woman I’d ever loved, slept with, or kissed was shirtless on my lap, I was going to at least take a peek.

“Kevin and Carla apparently had some family emergency, so they took off. They wouldn’t say what, and so—” Azelie began.

“So, there’s no adult with you guys anymore,” Colette finished.

“Yes. But that’s no big deal. I just need a ride back into town.”

“Yes, it is a big deal with O’Connor roaming around after our family.” Colette sounded just like my mother had when scolding me during high school, and I couldn’t help but smile. Being an older sister suited her, which only made me—

Hold up, Ford . No. I didn’t need to jump to that. Not yet. I needed to fix things with her before I told her that she would make a great mom. That would fucking scare her off even if it was an innocent thing to have crossed my mind.

I focused on the conversation as Colette finished scolding Azelie for not being concerned about the fact that there were only three other kids around her at the moment.

“Okay, yes. It’s a big deal. Anyway, can you come get me?” Azelie grumbled in annoyance once Colette finished speaking.

“Just you? What about the others?” Colette answered.

“Well, Macy’s mom won’t be here for another half hour, and I don’t want to wait that long. Cory and Thomas are also waiting on Cory’s brother, but he’s only got that bench seat in his truck, so I won’t fit.” Azelie’s voice reminded me of Colette’s the longer she spoke.

Colette closed her eyes and tightened her hold on the phone. “Yeah, I’ll be there in just a bit. Stay safe, love you.”

“Love you, too,” Azelie replied, and the line went dead.

“I’ll go,” I stated immediately as Colette dropped the phone on the seat beside her and snatched up her shirt.

“What?” She froze and stared at me wide-eyed.

“You said your parents haven’t even had much of a chance to talk to you about being attacked. If you have to leave to go pick up Azelie, who’s also been specifically threatened, what are they going to think?”

She fervently shook her head. “No. It’s my job to protect her. To protect my parents.”

“I know. But you can’t do both right now.

Look, my mom only lets me sleep in my room because of my dad and Mawmaw, and because I know she secretly still loves me, but she doesn’t want me around the restaurant yet.

I can’t blame her, but that means I don’t have to explain where I’m going and why.

You go take care of your parents, and I’ll go pick up Azelie. ”

Colette slowly inhaled and slid her shirt back over her head.

“I hate how logical that sounds,” she grumbled. “Except you hate any sort of confrontation. So, if this is O’Connor and his doing, or if he gets wind of this, and just happens to take advantage of it—”

“Cher. Just because I hate it, and try to avoid it, doesn’t mean I can’t handle my shit.

Besides, I tend to intimidate people by simply showing up.

I’ll take care of her, okay? You’ve gotta start trusting that I’m not as complacent as you think I am.

” I slid my hands off her waist reluctantly, giving her room to climb off my lap.

She chewed on her bottom lip as if the concept that someone else could take care of her was foreign to her. I opened the car door, grabbed my hat, and wiggled awkwardly out, bumping my head on the frame as I exited.

“Okay. She’s at the high school up on the track,” Colette said, crawling out after me.

“Send Azelie a picture of me, with my name. Tell her to speak to no one, and go with no one else. And if anyone approaches her, to go and hide until I get there. Send her my number as well, so if she needs to call me, she can. And send me her number,” I instructed as Colette shut the door behind her.

She nodded once, quickly snapped a photo on her phone, and then tapped away on the screen. “Same number?”

I nodded once and gave her a tight smile, tucking the baseball cap back on my head. “Just in case you ever needed me after I left.”

Her fingers froze mid-text, and her chest stopped slowly expanding as the breath caught in her lungs.

“Also, here’s your car keys back.” I dug my hand in my pocket and pulled them out, quickly diverting the attention.

She shook her head, and without lifting her gaze toward me, she resumed typing. “No, you’ll need that to go pick her up.”

“I’ll take my motorcycle. We don’t need your parents wondering why your car is gone. ”

“Oh,” she muttered and finally locked her phone. My own phone buzzed in the front of my black cargo pants pockets as she slipped hers into the back of her jeans.

And I jogged off without another word to her. I knew we were on some very rocky ground. Knew that everything was confusing and we hadn’t even addressed the fact that we were about to very much fuck in the back of her car, but right now wasn’t the time to discuss any of that.

Someone she cared about was possibly in danger.

A teenage girl whom O’Connor had called out specifically.

I took a mental note to find out if there was some connection between Azelie and one of O’Connor’s contacts; otherwise, the mention of her was just an empty threat and something to rattle Colette’s tough exterior.

I prayed it was just that. Just something to try and intimidate her into selling, because I couldn’t fathom how a teenager and O’Connor might be connected.

But I also couldn’t let go of shit I’d seen overseas. Children weren’t off limits in war, and while I rationally knew this wasn’t war, this was a fight, a battle, and no matter how much I wished I didn’t know the reality of the nasty shit of the world, I did.

And I wouldn’t risk pretending like monsters didn’t exist at the expense of someone innocent to the harsh realities of how cruel this life could be.