Page 6 of Vows of a Mobster

Jesus, it sounded like a marriage.

“Here we go, ladies,” the waiter’s voice startled all three of us, making us jump. “Whoa, I didn’t mean to scare you,” he added through a chuckle.

Marissa got herself quickly together and beamed at him. “You can make it up to us,” she spoke seductively to him while Daphne and I shared a glance, then rolled our eyes at the same time. “Well, you can make it up to me. We are not into foursome sex stuff.”

I choked on the sparkling water and almost spit it all over. Thankfully, I saved myself that embarrassment.

“That’s too bad,” he muttered, his eyes lingering on me.

Pervert,I thought to myself wryly although it wasn’t fair to him considering the crap Daphne, Marissa, and I read. Our latest entertainment topic of a Prince Albert on a man’s precious jewel was still fresh in my mind. I wondered if it really made a huge difference when it came to a woman’s pleasure.

I shifted my eyes to Daphne and Marissa, raising my eyebrow. They both had those stupid, up to no good smiles on their faces. We really needed to grow up, or rather those two needed to grow up. I found myself to be the most responsible and mature of the three of us, probably by force of circumstances.

I returned my gaze to the waiter and told him, smiling, “Thank you for the drinks.” I hoped he’d get the hint.

“Anytime, beautiful,” he replied softly, giving me a half smile. He was good-looking although not my type. As all three of us watched him leave our table, I pondered if there was a man out there that was my type or was I destined to be alone forever. Perhaps, the single bad experience I had forever ruined me.

“Yes, you are definitely too pretty,” Daphne cackled and all three of us burst into laughter.

“Well that was weird,” I muttered.

“Why?” Marissa challenged. “Because he finds you attractive? Brie, you are gorgeous. You don’t even see the glances men throw your way. Those bedroom eyes of yours, lush mouth, and the air of innocence you portray… you could bring men to their knees.”

“Can you imagine how helpless they would be if she got on her knees?” Daphne teased. “Like when that heroine took the man’s cock-”

“Shhh,” I hushed her, glancing around.

“Can you imagine how lost men would be if they knew the stuff you wrote?” Marissa added jokingly.

“More like call me an unflattering name,” I answered.

“Only the jealous ones,” Daphne and Mar replied in unison.

I rolled my eyes. “Okay, let’s get back to the task at hand.”

“Okay, okay. Let’s be serious,” Marissa spoke. “I’ll follow you to your place and call Marcus on the way there.”

I smiled at her sneakiness. “Did you just invite yourself to my place?” I teased. Truthfully, I loved having both of my best friends over at any time. They came and went like they lived there.

“Did you like that, huh?” she answered, smugly.

Life was so much better with girlfriends that always had your back.

Two hours later, we sat in my front yard, watching Emma splash around in her little kiddie pool. She looked adorable in her little tutu bathing suit, a sunhat, and her skin covered in white residue from the sunscreen. She kept squealing happily; her eyes searching us out every so often.

Watching her like that, I couldn’t believe that the cancer was back. She didn’t look sick. Yes, she had been sleeping more recently. When I heard the diagnosis, I made them retake the tests. I couldn’t believe that life would be so cruel to have her go through it again. It must have been a mistake. And yet, it wasn’t.

Dr. Guzman, her pediatrician, wanted to perform a bone marrow transplant to help improve the chances of curing her leukemia.

“Brianna, it might be her only chance at survival,” his voice was full of pity. “We’ll have to start with chemotherapy. Since she is relapsing with leukemia, she could benefit from a bone marrow transplant.”

When she went through the treatments two years ago, I’d been too young and unprepared. Each treatment with Emma tore me in half. This time around, I needed to be stronger. Emma picked up on her surroundings and was very observant. I couldn’t afford to fall apart. She needed me, but just the thought of seeing her hurt from those drugs being pumped into her system made me want to cry. It wasn’t fair! It should be me suffering through it, not my baby. I wanted to spare her all that pain. My throat constricted and my eyes burned trying to hold it all back. Some days, I felt as if I stood on the edge of sanity, ready to fall down into the deep dark hole. Emma was the only thing holding me back.

Thank God Marissa and Daphne were there for me, but sometimes even that wasn’t enough. At times, I held it all in and screamed inside my head while on the outside I appeared normal and put together. How long before people start noticing nothing about me was together?

Daphne and Marissa sat on either side of me, on the front porch steps. The sun shone bright but the only thing I felt was the chill inside my soul. The terrified fear shook me on the inside, scared this was my payback.

Life for a life. Is this what that was?