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thirty

Mark

“ Y ou need to get up.”

“No.”

“Get dressed.”

“No.”

“Well, at least take a shower. My eyes are watering.” Rolling onto my back, all the wind gets knocked out of me as Noah straddles my waist and bounces on my stomach.

“Get the fuck off me!”

“Stop moaning like I weigh a lot. I’m light as a feather.”

“You weigh a ton!”

“I do not!”

“Noah, get the fuck off me!” He lifts off me, letting air rush back into my lungs. “Why can’t you let me be miserable in peace?”

“That’s not what friends are for, and I am the best friend you will ever have.” Noah pushes me off the bed, knocking me onto the floor.

“The fuck!”

“Come on. Get up. Go shower, for the love of god. Let’s rent movies, get junk food, drinks, I do not care. We’ll forget that asshole who dumped you.”

“He’s not an asshole. I deserve this.”

Noah sighs, sitting on the bed. “I think the situation you got yourself into is a hard one that I don’t think I’d have handled well either. I get it, and I’m sorry. I should have listened about Derrick. Then maybe Hunter wouldn’t have found out that way.”

“No, this is on me. I should have told him what was going on.” I’m just happy it’s finally over.

Derrick has been arrested on arson charges, and since then a bunch of women and men have come forward with allegations against him.

It just takes one domino for the stack to fall.

Some even had video proof but were too afraid to come forward with their stories.

Daddy dearest isn’t going to buy Derrick’s way out of this one.

It’s been two weeks since I visited Hunter, and yeah, it fucking hurts that he hasn’t come to see me after I talked to him. Part of me knew this would happen, though. I’m nowhere near good enough for him anyway. I just hope he gets over me quickly and finds someone amazing. He deserves it.

Sawyer told me he needs time, and that he’ll be out of school for a couple of weeks, but still, it hurts all the same. I barely sleep, barely eat. Okay, yeah, I also haven’t showered much. Lifting my arm, I flinch. “Okay, I’ll shower.”

“Thank god.” Getting up, I go to my drawer and grab some sweats and a tank top. “You know, if it uh . . . will make you feel better, we could um . . . I mean, if you wanted to, we could . . .”

“Don’t finish that sentence. Holy shit, Noah. No. Absolutely not.”

“Oh, thank god. A little bit of throw-up came up. I just wanted to be nice. I mean, you used to love my ass. I’m just trying to help!”

“I think I’m actually going to be sick if I think about it.”

“Oh, please! You are literally as sexually attractive to me as a cactus.” His face screws up. “You know what, that’s not fair. If it were between you or the cactus, I’d take the cactus . . . and I’d let it top.”

“You’re an asshole.”

Noah gets up, latching to my back and wrapping his arms around my waist, squeezing me tight before planting a kiss on my shoulder. For a moment he holds me, and I hate to admit it feels nice. “Hey, Mark,” he whispers through the moment. “Call my phone.”

I grab my phone, humoring him, and honestly that is right where I fucked up. I press his number and call. A moment later an eagle screech sounds from his phone. “Special ringtone.”

“I hate you.” I refuse to give in to the tug of my lips.

“What? I know immediately who’s calling.” He puts his phone back down. “So I can instantly ignore it.”

“Hey, Noah.”

“What?”

“I fucking love you. You know that?”

Face softening, Noah smiles. “I am going to throw up.”

“I’m taking a shower.”

Walking back to my dorm, I have to admit I feel better. Maybe I’ll get some sleep tonight. With my head a bit clearer than it’s been in weeks, I’m going to allow myself one more day. I can’t change what I did, but I can change how I live going forward.

With Derrick gone, I’m finally free and it feels like I can breathe.

I have my watch back thanks to Sawyer too.

After talking to the police he asked for it to be released since it had nothing to do with the investigation.

Now his family is on their way to healing.

I don’t deserve his mother’s kindness, but I’m so grateful for it.

So I’m going to focus on what I still have.

Noah has been here on and off for me, and I’m so grateful for where we’re at.

I’m going to focus on my game. I have to start working toward things instead of letting life just happen to me.

I can’t change what I’ve done to Hunter, but I can focus on being a man who is worthy.

I towel dry my hair as I turn the corner down to my hall. I freeze, seeing Hunter sitting by my door just as defeated as the first time I’d seen him by the vending machine. Only this time I’m the cause.

The brace he’s wearing catches my attention. From what Sawyer told me he has to be careful, but he will make a full recovery and possibly be able to play next year. For now, no hockey. No gym. I know that has to be killing him.

His eyes lift to mine and I nearly stop breathing. “Uh, Noah left. I uh, asked him if we could talk. Alone. I hope that’s okay.”

I blink up at the ceiling. All I want to do is fall into him. “Fuck, this is embarrassing. I swear I don’t cry this much.”

“I know. I’ve always associated you with raw unyielding masculinity.”

“Asshole.” I see a tiny smile on his lips. It feels like the biggest win. Taking a breath, I move to my door, opening it and letting Hunter come inside. He makes himself at home, sitting in my gaming chair, and I sit on my bed across from him, making room.

He gets the hint and sits beside me instead. I was fucking kidding myself if I thought I’d just get over him. Taking a deep breath, Hunter turns to me and his eyes collide with mine. “At what point did this become real to you?”

I smile because I’m an idiot. “The moment I saw you sitting in front of the vending machine looking like a kicked puppy.”

“But that was before Derrick got kicked off.”

I nod, not in the business of hiding anything anymore.

“There was something about you I liked the first night we met. When Derrick asked me to date you, he wanted me to hurt you instead. I didn’t even know it was you when he first suggested it.

I needed time. I hoped to get him to confess, that’s why I kept talking to him.

I didn’t know about Sawyer’s sister, though, I swear.

” I shake my head. “Honestly, I didn’t expect you to want me back, so I thought I could just bide my time and try to catch him.

You have no reason to believe me, but I have nothing to lose.

I have no reason to lie to you.” I’m trying and failing to hold back tears. “I’m so sorry.”

“Were you ever going to tell me?”

I don’t know what to say. “I was trying to find a way to get Derrick caught. Then I was planning on telling you. The morning of Noah’s party I almost did, but then he called and I just decided to wait until after.

I just kept pushing it back because I fell so in love with you, and I was so scared I’d lose you forever. ”

“Yet you didn’t care when we caught Derrick with Noah.”

“No. I wanted to kill him. All I could think about was making sure Noah was safe. I don’t regret that part.

If something had happened to him, I’d never forgive myself.

” I blink. “All of it was real. All of it. I never lied to you about my feelings. I was just forced to do something I didn’t want to do.

Everything between us is real. Everything I told you. ”

“I don’t know what to believe, I just don’t.”

“I know. I’m so sorry.” I feel my body shake. “I don’t know what to do.”

“Well.” I look up. “You can start by earning my trust back.”

Blood roars in my ears. I’m not hearing this right. I can’t be. There’s no way. “What? What do you mean?”

“I’m scared you’re going to hurt me again.” I go to protest, but Hunter squeezes my hands in his, effectively shutting me up. “I want to believe you won’t, but I’m scared. I’m willing to take a risk. You’re worth the risk.”

“I promise you I’m not.” Moving closer, Hunter wraps his arms around me. I’m rigid for a moment, unsure of what’s happening, until the shock melts away and I loop my arms around his neck.

“What you did was shitty, but I can also understand why you did it. I wanted Derrick caught just as badly.”

“I shouldn’t have been complacent. I shouldn’t have kept talking to him. I didn’t know about Jane. I swear I wouldn’t have agreed to it. I’m sorry.” I bury my face into his neck, being mindful of his knee. “I love you. I’m sorry.”

Pulling back, Hunter cups my face, smoothing his thumbs over my tear-stained cheeks. “Never again. Okay? If you lie to me again—”

“I won’t.” I’ll never hide a thing from this man. I’ll earn his trust back. Grovel. Beg. Prove to him that I’m worth the risk. Whatever I need to. “You’re my person.” I smile, earning me a brilliant one back.

Hunter leans in to kiss me and I groan at the feel of him. “My person.” I’m greedy, wanting all of him.

“Can you stay with me tonight? I want to sleep next to you. I’ve missed you.

” Hunter answers me by kissing me. The soft touch of his lips makes me moan.

I can’t believe this is actually happening, and I’m not fully convinced I didn’t slip and hit my head in the shower.

Either way, I’m not letting go. Hunter hooks me around the waist, pulling me onto his lap to straddle him, deepening the kiss.

I’m not sure how far he’ll let me go, but I want his skin against mine.

I’d happily sit right here making out with him for the rest of the night.

Hunter has other plans, moving his palms down my back before slipping them into my sweats.

Lazily swirling his tongue around mine, he finds the hem of my shirt and lifts it off.

Sitting up, Hunter does the same, and my palms land on the wide expanse of his chest. I run my fingers over his skin and my dick pulses inside my sweats.

I didn’t grab underwear earlier, which is becoming more and more evident.

“I can’t really do much right now.” Hunter’s face reddens.

“So, you’re saying I get to be in charge.”

That makes him laugh. “Just for tonight. When I’m all healed you better get ready.” Leaning down, I kiss his neck, just wanting his skin all over me. “You smell so good,” he says.

“Should have been here an hour ago. That was not the case.”

Hunter draws my nipple into his mouth. “I need you.”

While he may be out of commission, and I am not prepped for sex, that isn’t going to stop me from getting this man’s skin against mine.

I get up, digging my fingers into the band of his shorts and sliding them off, careful of his knee.

His cock slaps against his stomach, making my mouth water, and I pull off my own sweats before going to the dresser for lube.

I help him move further onto the bed, letting him lie back against my pillows.

I get back on the bed and pour some lube over his cock then my own.

Hunter sucks in a breath as I press us together.

The velvet softness of his skin rubbing against mine makes precum drip from my cock.

“Look at us,” Hunter whispers, watching our cocks slide against each other.

I jerk us together. My lips can’t get enough of his. My hand doesn’t fit around us both, but that doesn’t stop the most toe-curling pleasure from pool in my belly. “You’re fucking huge.”

Hunter smiles against my lips. “Now, I know this time it’s a compliment.” His fingers find my hair, fisting in the strands. “You’re so damn beautiful.” His palm slides down my back before dipping between my cheeks and tapping my hole. Electric shocks pull my balls up.

Removing his fingers, he wipes up some of the lube before putting his hand back. “Spread your legs.”

Listening to him, I spread my legs wider as the tip of his middle finger plays in my hole. “So tight.” The shallow rhythm of his finger makes my orgasm rush forward, and by the mess Hunter’s making, he isn’t far behind.

“I’m close. Holy shit.” Moaning, I jerk us faster.

Trying to remember we’re in a dorm room, I keep my moans quiet for the most part, until Hunter pushes us close, reaching his finger deeper and grazing that spot.

“I’m coming.” Hunter nods, his brows pinching with his own release as warmth spills between us.

“Holy shit.” I collapse on top of him, not caring about the puddle of cum between us. “So much for that shower.”

He laughs, wrapping his arms around me.

“We can sneak down in a minute.” It’s quiet and I look at him, his eyes glazing a bit. “Are you okay?”

He sighs. “I love you.” His head lolls toward me and he kisses my forehead.

“I’m sorry.”

“I know. No more lies, I mean it. Even if you’re scared or think it’ll hurt me. Lying and hiding will always hurt me more. If something happens, trust me enough to fight with you and for you, okay?”

“I promise.” I smile, running my hands through his hair. “How’s your knee?”

“I’ll be okay. I just need to take it easy is all. It’s one of the reasons it took me so long to talk to you. I was in a lot of pain for a bit.” Hunter’s eyes slowly close. “I’m tired.”

“Tired?” I sit up. “I’m giving you ten minutes and then you’d better be ready for an orgasmathon.”

“Mark, I’m exhausted, do you know how much sleep I’ve gotten lately?”

“Probably the same amount as me and you don’t see me bitching.”

“You’re soft.” Hunter pats my dick.

“Give me ten. Going to ride your face while I suck this beautiful big dick. You won’t have to move much. In fact, I like you helpless.”

“I’m not helpless!” he growls. “Your stamina is frightening.”

I run my fingers through his chest hair before lightly pinching a nipple. “You’ll be lucky if I stop touching you.”

Hunter shakes his head, snatching my wrist and pulling me down, kissing me hard. “Insatiable.” Kissing my forehead. “Beautiful.” He presses another to my cheek. “Incredible.” Pressing one kiss to my lips. I groan. “Mine.”

“Yours,” I agree, my hands smoothing over his hip to grab his ass, bringing him closer. I say a silent pledge to myself. No matter what, I’ll never hide anything from this man again. Ever. “Only yours.”