Page 24

eighteen

Mark

I ’m so fucked.

With every passing day this is getting harder.

Derrick texts me daily now, harassing me, but thankfully he hasn’t tried to see me in public.

I’d hoped after he came to my room he’d leave me alone completely.

I need more time. I’m not any closer to my goal.

I did ask Derrick if he wants to hang out tonight because Hunter is leaving for an away game, but unfortunately—or fortunately—Derrick said he’s busy.

Details about the fire have never been released, though arson is listed as the cause so to ask Sawyer about it would seem suspicious.

I can’t risk it. If Sawyer finds out, he’ll tell Hunter, and if they both know Derrick is blackmailing me, they may not listen to me.

If they don’t listen, and I get charged anyway, Derrick goes free.

Again. Not fucking happening. Derrick will pay.

I need more time.

I need to figure this out.

“There’s the sexiest man I know.” I smile as Hunter’s strong arms wrap around me. He’s only going to be gone for a few days, but I’m going to miss him. When we’re together I don’t even think about the stupid blackmail. This is real. My feelings have always been real.

“Hey.” He pulls me in for a kiss, and I forget all the bullshit. Just for a second. “What are you doing? Are you packed?”

“I’m all set. We’re leaving in a bit. I just wanted to see you.

I’m going to miss you.” Hunter nips at my throat, and I should be mindful about being out here in the courtyard like this for everyone to see, but I don’t care.

I feel like every second I’m with him might be my last. “I’ll call you tonight, okay?

” He kisses me hard, and I soak in the heat and pressure of his body against mine.

His palms slide down my back to squeeze a handful of my ass.

“Ew! No one wants to see that gay shit.” My hackles rise before I look behind us and shake my head.

“Said me never!” Noah laughs. “Although I don’t ever want to see Mark like that again.

I only just stopped having nightmares.” Noah steps between us, forcing us apart.

“Puck Daddy, however . . .” He walks his fingers up Hunter’s chest.

Snatching Noah’s fingers, he holds them in his hands before looking up at me. “New name. Now.”

Noah stomps. “But Puck Dad—” Hunter lays his hand over Noah’s mouth.

“Stop licking me.”

“Noah, stop it.” I shove Noah away from my poor boyfriend. Hunter doesn’t know what to make of this, and honestly, neither do I. My relationship with Noah is something I’m still figuring out myself.

“So . . .” Noah chews the end of his pen. “Has Sawyer asked about me? Crying himself to sleep dreaming about the amazing night we shared? Planning our wedding?”

Hunter shakes his head. “He hasn’t said a word. Not a peep.”

Noah taps his chin. “Crying internally. I get it. That man is so brave.”

“Noah, he’s probably trying to scrub the memory out of his mind.”

“And to think I was just going to invite you to hang out with me. My roommate’s gone for the night.” He looks Hunter up and down. “Unless you have plans with Puck—” Hunter’s jaw clenches. “Harold.”

“Hunter,” he says.

“If you want, we can grab food. Maybe watch a movie. Tell me all the filthy things this gorgeous man does to you behind closed doors in very detailed detail.”

I laugh. “That sounds like fun.” I look at Hunter, and shit, I’m going to miss him. “Still call me tonight. I’m sure I’ll want the distraction.”

Hunter laughs, pulling me in for a kiss. “I’m going to miss you. Call you as soon as we check in.” He gives me a kiss, and Noah leans forward pursing his lips. Hunter pushes his head away.

“What? I thought we were handing out kisses?” Noah pouts.

Hunter shocks the hell out of me, leaning in and kissing Noah on the cheek. Surprise hits Noah’s face.

“Why thank you, Puck—” Hunter holds a finger up in warning. “Hen—”

“Hunter. It’s Hunter. My name is Hunter, and I really like your friend. Please keep him entertained until I get back.”

“Is Marvin going to be there?”

“Um, Monty? Yeah, we’re rooming together.”

“Well, tell Matthew I’m thinking about him.” Noah beams.

“Uh, yeah. Yeah, no problem. Call me later, or text if you’re busy.” He gives me one last kiss, leaving me with the maniac I’ve decided is going to be my best friend . . .

“I bet he has a fantastic ass.”

“You’re an idiot.” I walk in the direction of his dorm room. “But yes, he does.”

It’s a long walk from my dormitory to his on the other side of campus, where he lives on the third floor, and Noah is thankfully silent the entire way here. I feel like shit, though, for all the times I made him walk this on his own after we’d hooked up.

My stomach churns with guilt. Why was I so awful to him? I really need to change.

He lets us both inside, and Noah drops his bag onto the floor.

“Hey, Noah.” He turns to me, and I just need to get this out.

“I’m really sorry. I mean, for everything.

For everything I’ve done to you. The way I took advantage of you.

Making you walk home alone every time. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.

I just—” I swallow the clog of tears in my throat.

“Thank you for giving me another chance to be your friend. I don’t deserve it. ”

Noah inspects me for a minute, and the scrutiny makes me burn.

“It’s okay, Mark. I know I can be a little bit much.

” My brows rise. “A lot, some have said.” He laughs.

“Look, I just want a fresh start. A real fresh start. I don’t have any real friends and you don’t have any friends.

Let’s just start over, okay? I’m okay, really.

I forgive you.” He gives me a slight smile and I let that be that.

I don’t feel good about it, or feel that it’s enough, but it is a start.

“Dinner is my treat,” I say because that’s all I can really offer him.

“Sounds good.” Flopping onto his bed, he sighs. “How did you not get a roommate? I mean, mine isn’t the worst, and luckily he has a girlfriend, so he’s barely even here anymore. Still, would like to know how you managed that. Not that it didn’t benefit both of us.”

“Money talks.” I shrug. Nerves begin to eat at me.

“I am way richer than you,” Noah says. “But my father thought it would be a good experience for me to meet other guys around my age. Little does he know.” He winks. “Be thankful I’m spending my free time with you and not getting laid.”

“I don’t want to know.”

“I have a date this weekend.” Noah grins.

“What?”

“Don’t be mad.”

“Why would I be mad?” I eye him and he looks away. “Why would I be mad, Noah?”

“That guy that you hang out with . . . he asked me on a date.”

“What guy?”

And although I ask, I already know. Jesus, Noah. “The sexy redhead.”

“Derrick?” No. No. What the hell? “What do you even like about him? How? No. Noah. Come on, you can do better. How did this even happen?” Even though I ask, I know how. Derrick approached Noah to get back at me.

“He asked me out. I think he’s cute, so I’m going to give it a shot.” There’s no way. I don’t trust him not to hurt Noah to get back at me.

“Noah, please don’t go out with him.”

“Why not?”

I have no real proof to back up how I feel. I just . . . I just don’t trust him. “Just trust me. You can do way better.”

“Isn’t he your friend?”

I have to tread lightly. Noah doesn’t know the situation, and if he goes back and tells Derrick any of this, it could fuck me over. It’ll ruin any shot I have of getting Sawyer and me justice. “No, not really. Just please, you can do better.”

“Look, if you’re still in love with me just say that.”

“Oh my god, shut up. Just don’t go out with him, alright? Trust me. Please. You have an entire roster of hockey players to go through.”

“Mm, true.” Noah gets off my bed, undressing like it’s no big deal. Walking around in bikini briefs, he goes to his drawer.

“Can you not?”

“What? You’ve been inside me. What’s the issue?” He shakes his head and grabs one of his crop T-shirts, slipping it on. “Get into one relationship and suddenly you can’t see another man’s ass.”

“Maybe I don’t want to see your ass.”

Noah’s face twists with misplaced sympathy. “No . . . that doesn’t sound right.” Thankfully, I’m already wearing sweats and don’t need to change. I just watch Noah toss clothes from his drawer with my mind still on Derrick. I sit on his bed feeling fidgety again. “You alright?”

“I have a lot on my mind.” I have so many things happening all at once and I don’t know how to handle this. “I need . . . fuck. Sorry. I’m not good at the feelings thing.”

“Tell me about what you guys did at the fair after you ditched me and Bakery Booty.”

I laugh. “How was that? Was it good at least?”

“We didn’t sleep together,” Noah says flatly.

“What? What happened?”

Noah plops onto his bed, pouting. “After we left you two losers we were going to go right back to our dorms. Seymour’s room is on the floor below me.

He was, I don’t know, sad about something.

And me being the amazing friend I am, I just wanted to make him feel better.

We were only going to have a few drinks, and well, a few drinks turned into a lot of drinks.

We started making out . . . it was hot, right.

Man can kiss, I’ll give him that. Then it started getting hotter, and I’m taking off my clothes .

. . he’s taking off his clothes. Juicy shit.

Man has an ass sculpted by the gods. Then Sean started to cry.

When I realized they weren’t tears of joy from seeing me in the nude, we stopped.

He continued to cry and talk about this guy he’d dated for a bit, cried some more, threw up on my favorite fucking pillow, Mark, and then fell asleep face down on my bed, naked.

Besides moving his head so he wouldn’t choke on his vomit, I didn’t want to move him. ”

“What!?”