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Chapter Forty-Eight

Tobias

I’ve never minded Valentine’s Day dates.

It was just another day at work. Though, the people who chose me for that day stuck with me.

I felt like maybe they were a little sadder than the people I get on other days.

Most of them had lost someone and miss being taken out on the day of love, and so they hire me for dinner, as a reminder of what it was like.

Not ready to move on, but okay with dipping their toes in.

This year, I’m the sad one, but I don’t let that deter me from my duties. I get dressed in a maroon and black suit, make sure my hair is good, put on some cologne, then wait for my ride. The restaurant will be packed, but I’m prepared to deal with it.

I keep reminding myself I’m going on this date for them, not for me.

Tonight isn’t about me and how sad I am that I’m once again single on the day of love.

Something that never bothered me before but is making me feel more lonely than ever this year.

Theo and I didn’t talk about doing anything on this day, but now that it’s here, I’m really feeling him being gone.

It’s been six weeks since I last saw him, since I heard his voice, kissed him, touched him. It’s fucking torture. How much longer is this going to last?

I woke up this morning, wanting to text him. Desperate to hear him. But also to shake him silly and ask what his problem is and why he hasn’t reached out. How did he forget me so soon? I want to be angry at him for everything he did, and I am, but I’m also… way too understanding.

From the get-go, I knew getting into a relationship was a bad idea. Not just because of me, but because of him and all he was dealing with. But I couldn’t help myself. Every time I was with him, I didn’t want to leave. I wanted more. I still want more, despite his transgressions. I just want him.

I’m mad at him for lying to me, but I can’t fully blame him for that. He was scared. Terrified. I should have known better. No, that doesn’t make his lying okay, or the cheating, but… I don’t know. I just fucking miss him, and I hate that I miss him when he obviously doesn’t miss me.

I think back to how long it took me to get over Brandon, but I can't come up with an answer. When I finally got the balls to leave Brandon, I was already over it. I was done with him while we were still together. So that isn’t helpful.

When I left, I was relieved. Now? I feel like I’m going to miss Theo forever.

It feels like I'm never going to get over this .

My car shows right on time, and I get to the restaurant a few minutes before the scheduled time.

As I walk inside, I wonder about my date, Donald.

If he gives me some sad story about his husband or wife dying, I may not make it through the night.

I can’t handle sad stuff today. Maybe I shouldn’t have worked today, but I’m here now, so there’s no turning back.

All I can do is hope this goes smoothly.

“Good evening, sir. Can I help you?” the host asks with a bright smile. He’s a young man with dark blond hair.

“Evening, I’m here to meet with a Mr. Wren.”

He smiles, then browses through his tablet.

“Mr. Wren has already been seated. I can take you to him.” He puts his tablet down. “Please, follow me.”

The host leads me through the crowded restaurant. It’s the same place I met Theo at for the first time, and I hate that it’s all I can think of. We pass the table that we sat at, and my eyes linger on it and the couple seated there. Seems like forever and not that long ago all at the same time.

“Here you are,” the host says just a moment later.

Great. We’re right near it. Just what I need—another reminder of Theo.

I smile at the host, then take my seat. When I set eyes on my date, I almost fall off the chair.

“Please don’t leave,” Theo says, his eyes pleading.

I’m so caught off guard, my mouth drops open and I can’t form words. Though, that doesn’t last for long. The moment the anger sets in, I find my words just fine .

“What are you doing here?” I hiss, leaning forward to keep my voice down.

“I needed to talk to you.”

“And you do it by lying to me? Haven’t you done that enough?” I growl.

How dare he?

When he doesn’t answer, I add, “I did not think you would stoop so low, Theo.”

He was pissed at Brandon for doing this, mad about him tricking me into a date, yet here he is doing the same thing!

“Tobias, please. Just listen to me.”

I purse my lips, crossing my arms over my chest and looking out toward the dining room. I can’t even look at him. And here I was, missing him.

“Good evening, gentlemen. Can I get you started with some drinks?” the pretty waitress asks.

“Give me a glass of your most expensive liquor,” I say, turning my gaze back on Theo’s. If he’s going to play dirty, I can do the same thing.

“Whiskey, please,” Theo says with a polite smile.

“We have Macallan, sir,” she says, darting her eyes to me. “It’s also the most expensive…”

“He’ll have that,” I say before Theo can get an answer in.

When she leaves, I pin him with a glare, waiting for an explanation.

He doesn’t say anything, and this reminds me all too much of our first date.

How fitting that it’ll be the first and the last, because I am going to screen every date I have moving forward so this can never happen to me again.

Why did he think this would be a good idea? To completely blindside me?

“Six weeks with no communication, and you decide to get me on a date by lying? You better start talking because I am not staying here a minute over the allotted one-eighty.” I glance at my phone. “You’re already down nine.”

“Tobias,” he begins, bright green eyes holding mine. “I miss you.”

I huff out a laugh. “Congratulations. Oh, hey. Does Marianne know you’re here? Actually, don’t answer that. I’m sure you won’t be truthful anyway.”

He flinches away. “I deserve that,” he says softly. “But for the record, she knows I’m here.”

“Lovely, but threesomes aren’t my thing.”

He sighs. “You’re angry—”

“That doesn’t even touch what I’m feeling right now.”

“I hurt you, and I don’t deserve your forgiveness.”

“Goddamn right you don’t.”

“But I won’t stop trying to earn it. I don’t care how long it takes.”

“It’s going to be a lot more than three hours and fifteen hundred bucks, I’ll tell you that much.”

“I understand,” he says.

The fact he isn’t arguing with me is making me angry.

Why won’t he argue with me? Why won’t he fight?

I’m being unreasonable. Why doesn’t he see that?

I keep my gaze on him while he stares at the table.

I hate how good he looks. Hate that I made myself look this good for him when he doesn’t deserve it.

We don’t say another word until the waitress brings our drinks.

“Are you ready to order?” she asks cheerily.

“We need a few moments, please,” Theo says.

“I’ll be back shortly.”

She leaves, heading to another table. I reach for my drink and take a mouthful. The quicker I can drink this, the quicker I can get another.

“Hope you came prepared to pay an astronomical bill,” I comment.

“I’ll manage,” he says with a sigh.

But the way he says it is off. Something about his tone isn’t right.

“What’s wrong, Theo? Is your fiancée spending all your money already?”

He chews on the inside of his cheek as he watches me, and everything on his face tells me I’m very wrong.

A pang of guilt hits me in the chest, but I refuse to back down.

I won’t give him kindness when all he gave me are lies.

No matter how much it hurts to be mean to him, I won't stop. I won't be nice to him.

“If you can’t afford me, you shouldn’t have booked,” I add. “You know I’m not a cheap date. ”

I finish off the Macallan and flag the waitress down for another.

This glass could be anywhere from twenty dollars to a hundred, depending on the year. And I couldn’t care less which it is. He’s made of money. Made it very clear it was all worth more than me.

“I don’t care about the money, Tobias.”

“Don’t care about much, do you?” I say with a grin, though it isn’t friendly.

He just keeps watching me without saying a word.

So I add, “You know what? No.” His frown deepens as I huff out an unhappy laugh.

“I am not doing this with you. Not here. Not today. You can complain to my boss, if you feel so inclined.” I get up and leave the restaurant, not looking back.