Page 12

Chapter Twelve

Tobias

Holidays are always busy in the dating industry, and Foxy’s is jam-packed.

I open up my schedule a bit more, squeezing some time in for early lunch dates.

It’s not needed, but I don’t hate the extra money and keeping myself busy this time of year is pivotal.

I don’t need reminders of how I don’t have anyone important in my life.

Normally it doesn’t bother me, but this year feels different, and I might go do something stupid like care about it.

Because Brandon hasn’t messed with my schedule, even though he threatens to whenever he sees me, I get major holidays off.

I never asked for that, but he kept doing things he thought I wanted, when all I wanted was for him to be fucking nice and treat me like a human and not a piece of ass.

In a weird twist of events, I owe him for getting into the professional dating scene because I became fine with people using me for my looks.

I was not okay when I started this job, which is why I did everything wrong.

But I will say, being paid for this does make it easier to keep distance.

I don’t have to look them in the eye during breakfast or wake up next to them in the morning.

Each night, I go home to my own bed, and I don’t have to worry about awkward showers or the right moment to say, “Well, I should go.” The only person I ever spend the night with is Charlie, and that’s just…

a piece of me I’m not sure I’ll let go of.

It’s almost like a little reminder, something that anchors me from spiraling, letting me know it's not how I want my life to be.

I refuse to let another person treat me as badly as Brandon did. Which is why I’m crazy for contemplating what settling down and having a family would be like. I’m happy people like Theo want their perfect lives, their kids and white picket fences. It’s just not for me.

Offering to be friends was completely random and it may come back to bite me in the ass.

In some ways, it’s safer. He isn’t paying me, so I can call the shots with where we go and what we do.

I wasn’t lying when I said I feel he needs a friend, and maybe I need a friend too.

We could help each other. Sure, I have friends from the bar, but they're younger than me and living a different life. Theo and I are closer to being on the same page. I’d also like to see this thing through with him, in the way that I want to know how he ends up.

He’s a good person and deserves everything that’ll make him happy.

Also… he now has full access to my life. I could have banned him from Foxy’s, but for what? Because I crossed the line? That’s unfair. He did nothing wrong, and I won’t punish him fo r it. There’s just something about him that makes me want to be there for him, and that’s that.

“So, Tobias, tell us what you do for a living.”

I blink, tipping my wine glass to my lips to take a sip. It’s too sweet and I’m surely going to end up with a headache tomorrow if I have another glass after this one.

“I’m a physical therapist.” It’s much easier when dates allow me to give some truth. Mixing truth into lies makes everything a little more believable.

I reach over to take my date’s hand, linking my fingers with her long, thin ones. Her nails are long and pointy and there is no way in fuck I’d let those things near my dick. How the hell does she wipe her ass?

“Oh, that’s very nice,” Mrs. Carmichael says. I smile at her, taking another sip.

I rarely turn dates down, and I’ve always enjoyed them with everyone.

Men, women, anyone in between. I don’t care.

I enjoy people. Talking to them, getting to know them, putting on a show.

Maybe I should have been an actor, but those hours are too grueling.

Even though I love my dating job and everything that comes with it, something about today feels weird.

I can’t stop thinking about Theo, and how maybe we aren’t so different.

I’m here faking a date with a female just to get paid.

He’s faking being attracted to his fiancée just to survive.

That’s not all that different, when you dig deep .

We’re both living lies to satisfy some part of us that shouldn’t get so much attention.

Maybe that’s why I want to be friends with him. I see things in him that I also see in myself, and maybe I want to be around someone who just gets it. Someone who understands that sometimes you have to do things you don’t want to do.

Of course, our situations are much different. I’m choosing to do this, and I guess he is too, only… he’s being more forced into it than me. Still, does that even matter?

“That’s why he can’t come to dinner tomorrow, Mom,” Allison, my date, says, giving my hand a little squeeze.

We prepared before this date because she was so worried that her mother would see right through it.

I don’t understand why people put so much into these things, knowing they’re going to have to keep lying or explain a breakup.

If they’re lying because their parents expect them to be dating, won’t a breakup just make it worse?

I don’t know. Never had that problem, because my family never met any of my boyfriends.

Not the casual ones when I was younger, and definitely not Brandon.

Though, that was more for my family then him.

I'm not sure he'd step foot on the property, never mind in the house. If it's not lavish, it's not for him.

“Ah, yes. I remember,” her mother says.

They go on to chat about some cousin’s birthday party and I zone out, absently sipping my wine and picking at my turkey dinner .

Thanksgiving is tomorrow and I’m anticipating the fury I’ll get from my sister when she finds out I have a date at seven and won’t be staying for long.

If only she knew what I knew about my mother, perhaps she’d be on my side and would stop giving me so much shit.

No, that’s a load of crap. My mother could burn me alive, and my sister would still be up her ass.

Which is why I don’t bother explaining any of it to Molly.

She’ll never understand why I’m so upset and will only make excuses that will only anger me.

Allison and I see her mother safely into a taxi when dinner is done, waving and smiling as she drives off into the Seattle traffic. It’s drizzling, as it usually is.

“Oh lord, thank you so much.” She blows out a sharp breath, putting her hand on my shoulder. “Seriously, you just saved me so much trouble.”

I shrug, giving her a smile. “Just doing my job.”

“Well, you get an A-plus from me.”

“Thank you. I truly appreciate that. Are you good to get home?”

“Oh, yeah. I’m meeting some friends at a bar across town.” She holds her cell up to show me she has the Uber app open.

“Well, have a good night, Allison.”

“You too.”

I shove my hands into my pockets and start walking.

I’m not far from The Butterfly. I’ll get drenched but it’ll be quicker to walk than drive.

There’s nothing left to do tonight, other than dread tomorrow.

May as well drink to forget—or try to forget.

Maybe I’ll be so hungover tomorrow that I won’t care where I am.

I push through the outside door, moving to the side when someone starts up the stairs to leave.

It's a very strange building. Walking down into what looks like a tunnel before getting to the bar, but some of these old Seattle buildings are just like that.

An architects nightmare, I would assume.

“Hey, Tobias,” Mario says, startling me.

“Oh, hey. Leaving already?”

“Just having a smoke.”

I nod before leaving him and heading inside.

It’s dead, other than the regulars. The group of guys I know are all sitting together at the bar, and a few others that come here often that I recognize by face but don’t really know are off in another corner.

Behind the bar, as usual, is Pete—and someone else.

An attractive blond guy that looks about my age. Must be the new owner.

“Hey, guys.” I take up the seat beside Benton and catch Pete’s eye. He gives me a head nod and gets to work on my drink.

Nathanial gets up to give me a hug, while the other guys wave and say their hellos from their seats.

Nathanial is affectionate with the people he considers friends, and it’s always a point of contention when he dates someone, which is why he chooses not to.

He hops onto my lap, resting his forehead against my temple.

I don’t think he was hugged enough as a child .

“What’s up with you?” he asks quietly as Pete puts my drink in front of me. I slide my card over, and he takes it.

“Nothing. Why?”

“You’ve been here a lot,” Nathanial answers softly, his hand running up and down my back. If I didn’t know him as well as I do, I’d kick him off me, but this is just Nathanial, and I’ve known him for years. I don’t mind his need for physical touch. He’s harmless.

“Just hanging out.”

“You only hang out when you’re sad.”

“Not true.”

I grab my drink, taking a sip and enjoying the burn of the whiskey going down my throat.

With enough whiskey, thoughts of being sad won’t be able to bother me.

Nathanial pets me, then kisses my cheek before bouncing back to his seat at the other end of the bar.

He’s not entirely wrong. I’m not sad, I’m just…

blah. I don’t know how to explain it. In a funk, I guess.

Thinking too much. There's always a problem when I think too much.

“Did you get a look at the new owner?” Luca asks, leaning forward on the counter so he can see me past Benton. “He’s a hottie, right?”

I chuckle. “Yeah, he’s okay.”

“Okay?” Luca gapes. “He’s sex on legs.”

“I’m sex on legs,” I say with a grin.

Luca smiles suggestively. “I guess that’s true, but he’s still hot. ”

“So, ask for his number.”

“Oh, no. He’s… involved.”

“What the hell does that mean?”

“It means,” Benton says, drawing out the word and swinging around on his stool to face me. “That he moved away from home to follow some guy he’s in love with but missed an opportunity with a few years ago.”

“No way,” I say.

“Yes way,” Benton and Luca say at the same time. I roll my eyes. Gossip queens.

“How the hell do you know that?” I sneak a glance at Emmet, who’s got a clipboard in his hand and looks like he’s taking inventory of the bottles on the shelves.

He’s attractive, for sure. Lean but muscled, like he works out regularly.

Blond hair, bright eyes. Looks like the jock type, which isn’t my type.

“Because we’re us,” Luca says, leaving out the duh . “We had to know who he was before he came here and took over the bar.”

“So, you stalked him?”

“That’s a harsh word.” Benton frowns.

“Yeah, Tobias. It was just research.” Luca grins, but he knows what he did was stalking.

My phone buzzes, pulling my attention. I check it, and it’s a notification from Foxy’s for a date from someone named Roger. I accept it, then tuck my phone into my pocket .

“So, how’s your boyfriend?” I look up and meet Nathanial’s chocolate brown eyes. They’re such a contrast to his light brown hair.

“He’s not my boyfriend.”

“Uh-huh…” He takes up the seat on the other side of me, so I swing my stool to look at him. He isn’t going to let this go until I give him some info.

“He was a client,” I explain.

“But you brought him here.”

I nod. “He’s… struggling with some things.”

“His sexuality, I assume.” I smile but don’t respond. There isn’t a rule against sharing this sort of information with people, but it’s rude. “That man likes dick.”

I huff out a laugh. “Oh, don’t I know it?”

“Does he know it?”

“Yeah, I think he does.”

He nods carefully. “You like him.”

“I just said he’s a client.”

“That you brought here…”

“Am I having Deja vu?”

Nathanial chuckles, reaching for the drink Pete just brought him and taking a sip. He puts the glass down after taking a long sip from the two small straws, staring at it for a long moment before darting his eyes towards me.

“Can I ask you something without you getting upset?”

“I could never get upset with you, Nathanial. ”

And that’s true. Nathanial has a special place in my heart. Without being offensive, he’s like the lost little puppy you find out in the rain. Even when he pees on your floor, you can’t be mad about it. He means no harm, he's just unapologetically himself.

“Except that one time…”

“I miss that shirt,” I argue, finishing my drink. Pete is already dropping me off another.

“It was a contest, Tobias. And you didn’t get it off quick enough,” Nathanial argues.

“You didn’t have to tear it open.”

“What can I say? Those abs are hot.” He runs his hand over my stomach, and I chuckle.

“Ask your question,” I say with a huff.

“Do you plan on being a professional date forever, or will you settle down again?”

How did I know this is the sort of question he was going to ask? Though he too refuses to settle down with anyone, he’s always worried about everyone else getting married and finding love. He’s like cupid. And he doesn’t let me answer before he continues.

“We all know Brandon was an ass, but—”

“My dating life has nothing to do with Brandon,” I say firmly.

He frowns. “If you were happy alone, we wouldn’t care, but we worry about you.”

“You don’t need to. ”

“Well, we do.”

“None of you are married yet.”

“No offense, Tobias, but you’ve got quite a few years on us.”

I scoff but smile. “Call me old again, and I will get upset.”

He rolls his eyes.

“We just want you to be happy.”

“I’m fine. Trust me, I’m fine.”

He raises a brow, and I raise mine in response.

“Fine. Whatever you say.” He holds his hands up in defeat as he hops off his seat, then grabs his drink to walk off. “Okay, who’s ready for some Tay-Tay?!” he shouts, and everyone but me and Emmet whoop in response. I catch his gaze. It’s a firm look. Not intimidating, but… curious maybe?

I turn my stool to watch Nathanial as he gets up on stage and turns everything on so he can serenade us through our night that will surely end up with all of us drunk and stumbling home. As long as I have enough drinks to believe the lies I just told him, I think I’ll be okay.