Page 66

Chapter

Forty-Nine

Liv

Time is a bastard. Like Death—whom I used to expect at every turn—time toys with me. But I am growing used to bastards and might yet become one myself.

“ L iv, what are you doing now?” Maev finished burying the night’s fire under a mound of earth and dusted off her hands, looking down a dirt-smeared nose to where I was lying.

The sky was turning pink, just coming over the horizon, and the air was crisp, with puffs of steam billowing out every time I exhaled.

“Can you hear it?” I reached out a hand and brought her to the rock my ear was pressed to.

The damp earth seeped through my thin layers of clothing while I listened to the hum. The smell of dirt, the cold bite of the morning, and the sounds of the ground singing its serene melody put me into a trance.

Maev pressed her ear to the ground, giving me a funny look. “I don’t hear anything.” She grabbed a piece of my near-white hair and pushed it away from my face. “We need to keep moving. We need more crystals for you. You are fading further and further.”

We were in a beautiful, flat, wooded area. The trees, wrapped in a creamy white bark, were tall and slender, shooting straight into the sky. You could see everything on the ground because the bulk of its yellow leaves were high in the air.

“The earth is speaking, Maev. It hums like the magic does. It’s soft, like a mother’s voice.”

“Oh-kay.” Maev clapped her hands, and her voice became steel.

“Time to get up and go. That’s enough of that.

It’s been nearly a month since our last crystal was filled.

You’re overflowing. We have lucked out so far, not being stopped by anyone on our journey north.

I was worried someone would see you, say a mean comment, and you’d accidentally blow them up.

Instead, I get tree-hugging Liv. I can’t predict you anymore. ”

I rose, letting her pull me to my feet. The forest spun around me as I collected my strength.

Bearing the weight of the magic meant I had to stay calm and move unhurried—otherwise, I would lose control.

My slow pace made our travels drag on, but if I continued to cut off the magic, the Aspis couldn’t find us.

The Rydavians would wage war if the Guardians came this way.

“It’s not luck that no one has stopped us,” I said. “It’s that we haven’t been travelling on roads. My feet are proof of that.”

Some days were easier than others, and I knew it had to do with my self-control. The box in my chest wasn’t always so solid, and those were the days I reverted to my old self. I had severed my only connection with Brekt, and I was desperate to see him, but I had to stay strong.

“What do you mean it’s not luck? We passed through the Southlands, and all the villages were empty. We’ve followed the coast north around the large bay and over rivers, and no one has guessed you’re the Ikhor. That is luck,” Maev argued.

Except there was no sign of Ollo. Maev swore he was alive, and we would continue to ask about him on our way north.

I shook my head. “It’s not luck. I think we have a guardian keeping us safe,” I whispered. Even with cutting off the magic, the shadow continued to appear—it had to mean the shadow had nothing to do with Brekt or the Aspis.

Maev’s face fell. “Your shadow isn’t a protector. The thing follows you, not us. And it has done nothing but cause you nightmares. I can’t find you when you wander off in the dark. How is that a good thing?”

I took a deep breath and held it before releasing—a practice Maev had shown me to calm my mind. I pictured myself in a pond, playing in the water with my friends. I was safe there. The pressure in my head, the buzzing headache, the humming earth—I tuned it all out.

“They aren’t nightmares.” I followed Maev’s lead and grabbed my things.

The wastelands to the south had been a nightmare. It had been nearly two weeks of travelling on the edge of the barren earth. South Rydavas resembled the stories my mother told Rebeka and me—that past the shores of the Endless Forest lay nothing but empty wastelands.

The Aethar built villages using dead trees atop scorched earth. It was all in the worship of the Ikhor and its godly powers. Why would the gods or anything they created want worshipers who maimed and destroyed?

We abandoned our Guardian’s clothes once we passed the first Aethar village, and we stole clothing from their huts.

A week later, we threw away the scratchy material after finding an abandoned cottage near the coast. There, we stole loose fabrics that clearly belonged to a man.

I had to tie the clothing to keep it on me, and Maev’s pants didn’t reach her ankles.

The strangest parts of our journey were the airships. We caught several flying from the sea over the wastelands. Maev said it was pirates. So anytime we saw a ship, we hid, watching and hoping for them to land and for Ollo to come running. But he never did.

“They are absolutely nightmares,” Maev said as we moved through the trees. “Because you scream every time you see the shadow thing. It haunts you. That’s not protecting you. It doesn’t do anything but chase you in your sleep.”

It was not the first time we had argued about the shadow.

“I have seen it while awake.” I held onto the thin trees as I walked, swinging around them.

Maev’s mood was almost always sour, but she was perfect company. She talked when I needed it and was quiet when she understood I needed to box my emotions up, even though she didn’t believe it to be healthy.

My refusal to use the magic left us unprotected.

Neither of us said it out loud—we were scared.

Though Ollo had not been skilled in fighting, he had offered security.

His absence had been difficult, and Maev didn’t speak of him much, which was something I understood.

She continued to believe he was alive and that the pirates were keeping him for ransom.

“ He’s too smart ,” she had said. “ And he’s not the type to sacrifice himself. He will use every advantage and get off that pirate ship. He’s probably already waiting for us at home. ”

I twirled around a tree, letting my long white hair flow in the breeze. “I still think the shadow has something to do with the god of Night.” I had dreamt of the shadow creature many times. But the dreams were never that place with the crystalline sky. And Brekt never came to me in sleep anymore.

“I know you do. But if it is Erabas, why would he not reveal himself?”

“I think it’s his ghost.” I saw a lot of ghosts.

Maev was obviously concerned about my well-being, but she was not in great condition either. We were both dirty, losing weight and tired. Though my years in the Endless Forest gave me enough skill to make fires and scavenge food, neither of us was physically strong.

I only had to hold on, have hope, and pretend like everything wasn’t falling apart.