Page 18

Chapter

Fifteen

Liv

Certain memories return to me with stark clarity. They are the ones that changed me the most.

T he world vanished. There was no city, no streets, no sounds of people or rain or boats on the river.

There was only Nuo and his warm eyes—though they were dull after the loss of him . They were pinned on me, wide in surprise, and his chest rose as he took in a sharp breath.

It had happened so fast I nearly missed it—my friend was in there, behind the mask he wore. For a moment, I was BB, and he was the leader showing me his world with no concern for the bad side effects. He was tied to my heart, and I welcomed it, missed it.

Then he remembered what I had become and an undeniable pain struck his face before hatred washed it away—the shift was a wave across his features.

I was his enemy.

The moment it happened, a weapon was in his hand, and the bubble burst. A crashing of sounds and colour broke the barrier, and the city sprang to life again. His focus narrowed, his chin dipped, and he moved to cross the river.

All my plans to explain myself evaporated in the breeze. I bolted.

“Get back here!” he screamed from behind me.

It only made me run faster, and I was out of breath sooner than I should have been.

Nuo was crashing into citizens on the bridge, yelling at them to move out of his way. “Stop that woman!” he ordered.

Ahead, there was a large group of shops, and everyone had turned to watch. Their eyes lit up when they saw Nuo, recognizing him as a Guard.

My plan to return to the Guards was idiotic. I couldn’t explain my side of things when he had a blade in his hand.

“It’s the Ikhor!” he told the crowd. “Seize that woman!”

If Nuo had hoped to find help in the streets, his declaration had the opposite effect. A perfect storm of chaos and fear erupted as I sprinted over rivers and under roots. People ran from me, screaming that the Ikhor was in the city.

I pushed past women holding themselves in fear against market stalls, and men cursed me as I jumped over huddled children. No one was brave enough to reach out and grab the evil-possessed woman running from the Guard.

I stumbled past a wagon, its edge clipping my elbow, and I swore.

I ran past more posters of myself, screaming, with the warning written on the paper. People recognized me now.

Why wasn’t Nuo gaining on me? He should be faster. I didn’t dare look behind me as I darted around corners and took bends in the road. I made it as difficult as I could for him to keep up. Even if part of me wished I could turn and face my once friend.

God, I missed him.

A horrible humming rang in my ears, and I winced at the pain in my head. A nauseating wave of fear tore through me, and I stumbled, crashing into a railing alongside a bridge. The colours swam.

I had to keep moving. If I stopped, he would kill me, but the humming wouldn’t relent, and I was afraid of what was causing the sound—the magic. It wasn’t coming from someone else. It was mine.

The thing inside me … was it growing stronger?

I held onto my head as it rose in pitch, darting down the path and elbowing people as I pushed past them.

Shadows darkened the edges of my vision—figures hiding in alleys, watching me pass. I ran from them, too.

I skidded to a halt when I came upon a large square that opened up inside a circle of impossibly tall trees. Stalls and crates zig-zagged through the open market, which was bustling with vendors and the morning shopping crowd.

Daring a look back, I found Nuo in the distance, racing toward me, having difficulty navigating the frenzy.

I sped into the market, keeping close to the exits, and found a large stack of crates at the base of a tree to hide behind.

It was a stupid move, but I couldn’t catch my breath.

Squeezing my temples and squinting against the pain in my head, I dropped to the ground, huffing, choking on air.

A large root behind me created an alleyway between the crates and the tree, and I peeked between two crates to watch the open pathways.

Nuo tore into the market and scanned the crowd. He stood thirty feet away, but I might as well have been right next to him for how safe I felt.

People ran about, unsure where the threat was, and any tracks I may have left were lost.

Nuo spun in a circle, stopping when three more dark figures stood around him.

Panic clawed its way into my chest. No wonder he had been so slow. He was gathering reinforcements. The Guards were here, flanked by one I hated more than any other—Falizha. Why were they keeping her around?

“Where is the evil bastard?” Nuo yelled.

Several shoppers turned at the sound, going wide-eyed at the sight of the Guards.

“Who are you seeking, Guard?” An older woman stepped in closer to the four.

“A hooded woman just came through here. Did you see where she went?”

The woman shook her head, turning to another behind her who said, “The market is crowded with many hooded shoppers, Master Nuo. Many who are running.”

Nuo cursed, throwing his blade into the dirt, causing the people to jump back with a terrified cry. The blade swung from side to side with the vibrating force. He turned to the others. “We find the Ikhor, and you bring it to me. I get the first fucking hit.”

“Nuo, clear your head, man,” Bastane chastised. “We can’t fight with emotion.”

Fight with emotion ? He was the bastard who gave me up because he cared more about his bloodline than his honour.

“I will hunt the whole godsdamned world to make that lying evil bitch pay. She betrayed me!”

Kazhi’s glare was murderous before glancing at Bastane, and the two shared a knowing look.

Falizha seemed delighted to follow Nuo’s plan.

A hand landed on my shoulder, and I covered my mouth as I spun around.

Maev kneeled next to me, and her mouth set in a hard line as she gave me a once-over. With a sigh, she leaned in close and followed my line of sight to the Guards.

“How did you find me?” I whispered.

She held up her device and waved it as if saying, Duh .

I was a fool. How had I thought I could ignore all that had happened on that burning field and return to how things had been? Nuo’s promise to kill me was real.

Maev stuck her head close to mine so we could both peek between the crates.

Nuo was yelling at the others, but something was off about him. I hadn’t fully taken stock of his appearance back at the river. Now I could see everything I had missed.

“What’s wrong with him?” I kept my voice low so only Maev could hear.

“Who?” Light pouring through the cracks of the crates set a sharp line down the side of her face. It lit her blue skin, highlighting the lines and dashes across her cheekbone.

“Nuo. He looks awful. Sick.”

Maev’s face changed. Pitying. “You kinda look the same.”

“I can’t look like that.” I pointed back to the Guards.

Dark circles framed Nuo’s sunken eyes, and his skin was pale and tight to his bones. He had lost weight, even muscle. His hair was surprisingly long, nearly touching his shoulders.

“It’s only been a few days.” I gripped the side of the crate. “He looks like he’s been tortured.”

Nuo’s clothing hung off his body. After chasing me down the streets, he was panting as hard as I was while the others had already caught their breath, and his movements were jerky as he searched around him.

“A few days?” Maev shifted position to get a better view. “Liv, it’s been weeks.”

A jagged breath escaped me. What?

“Weeks?” I sputtered.

She opened her mouth as if to say more, but only nodded and bit her lip, searching my face.

No. No! Weeks couldn’t have passed. But it was there in plain sight, written over Nuo’s face—the stress living under his skin, the wan colouring, his long hair. I touched my own to find it past my shoulders.

“How many weeks?” I croaked. How long had it been since I lost him ?

“Nearly six.”

I choked on my breath. Six weeks.

He’s been gone six weeks.

My head pounded, humming with the magic. The sound was so powerful it blinded me, blurring my vision.

I tried and failed to recall all the time I had lost.

“It took us forever to cross the plains in the rain. The longest was that boat. We kept getting lost. We tried to get you to eat and to sleep. You were just quiet and staring at the sky most of the time.”

I pressed my back against the crate, tucking my knees in and holding myself in one piece.

Breathe.

Hold.

Breathe.

“Is this the magic?” I trembled against the crate. Was it that thing inside me? Was it causing me to lose time?

“The magic has been consistent with your emotions,” Maev explained. “The rains never stop. The thunderstorms start when you really disappear. I have thought it over many times, and I’m sure the magic responds to emotions. If you could control them, you may be able to stop any further flooding.”

I turned to Maev, pleading, “I didn’t mean to damage their lands. I didn’t mean any of this. I want it to stop. I’m not evil.”

Maev reached out to put an arm around my shoulder, and I flinched.

“Yeah, touching isn’t really my thing either,” she whispered, pulling back. “I’m just trying to offer comfort.” She patted me on the shoulders, gave me a weak smile, and sat against the crate next to me.

“I’ve had this fog in my head, preventing me from thinking straight.” I pulled at my hair, testing its length, to be sure. Real. It was real. Time had passed while I was unaware.

“The body and mind do amazing things to protect us from pain. You were mourning. Don’t blame yourself for the floods. None of this is your fault. Just learn to control it now and prevent further harm.”

Control my emotions. Control the magic.

I knew how to hide them, box them up, but control them? “I would have thought an Aethar would be happy these lands are drowning.”

“I don’t hate the people here. As a Rydavian .”

“The magic is controlled by how I feel. That doesn’t seem like how magic should work.”

“I’ve never read or been told how the gods use their magic.

” Maev tapped her lower lip, not paying attention to the growing threat in the market.

“I knew they controlled the elements, but not how. The pure bloodlines could control single elements, but I thought they died out. There’s a lot we lesser legacies don’t know. So much knowledge lost.”

I turned back to the market. The Guards were gone, and in the distance, Bastane’s retreating form disappeared into the crowd.

“They’ve left for now. We need to find a way out of the city. Ollo is waiting at the landing site. We can pay for passage on an airship and figure out the next step.”

Six weeks. The more I let it settle in, the further his memory was. The further I felt from the possibility of reaching Nuo.

Did I trust Maev enough to tell her about my dreams? Would she believe me when I said I thought they might be real, that they may be trying to tell me something?

I took a deep breath. I had so few options. I could try to make it on my own, but that scared me even more than following the Aethar.

Not Aethar. Rydavians.

“Okay. Let’s go.”

I stood, brushing the dust from my borrowed cloak. A wind crept along the back of my neck. It hummed, just like the magic inside me, and dread pooled in my gut as I searched for its source.