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I didn’t fully understand the Ikhor’s powers and was bluffing my way through. Maev had been right to be concerned.

I pushed the wet hair from my face, standing tall once more, playing the part of the evil Ikhor.

I demanded my sorrow to build, lifting my arms again and hoping the magic understood what I wanted.

The river responded as a column of water rose and inched its way before me, becoming a moving thing—a cylindrical shape, like the Aspis.

It coiled and slithered before the Guards, just as the Aspis had on the fields waiting to strike me.

Bastane was on his feet, sword in hand. He slashed at the water, only for his weapon to slide right through. The water forced him back, and he fell to the ground, sputtering.

Nuo’s face fell as he just stared at me.

A lump in my throat turned to a knife in my heart.

Nuo belonged to me, as much as he had, as much as my mother.

We belonged in each other’s lives, yet he sat opposite me.

Betrayal was evident—no mask could hide how much he hated me now.

His hair was a mess of wet clumps stuck to his face as the others choked, coughing up water.

But, of course, my Sea-leg friend breathed through it all.

While the others collected weapons and prepared to attack, I pulled the water back toward me.

I commanded my heart to open, to feel it once more and control the river beneath.

I lifted my palms to the Guards and spread my arms wide.

The water rushed toward me, and right before it collided with me, it angled up and out, creating a wall taller than I stood. Only mist hit my face.

I was understanding how the magic worked—how to use my emotion to wield it. Water was sorrow—mist, rain and the steady flow of a river. I needed to use my emotions to tell the elements what I needed, what I wanted. I had to feel it.

Through my wall of water, I could make out the shapes of the others.

I could see the rigid way Nuo held himself.

He was dying from the inside out, and I could no longer let it go on.

Six weeks of my life were gone without my permission.

I had allowed that fog to erase it all, as had Nuo, because of our loss.

I knew what I had to do to bring him out of that fog.

I released the water, letting it smash below me, only to raise a single column. I made it form the Aspis again, knowing it would have the effect I desired. “Guard,” I spat, eyes locking with Nuo.

Please let this work, I prayed.

He flinched, hearing my voice. Was he expecting the voice of evil?

“Look how weak you’ve become. Such an easy target.” I smiled. It was a lie, a mask—one he should have seen right through. But the part of Nuo that knew me was locked away.

His face changed, no longer hiding what lay beneath, and he opened his mouth to speak. To damn me, I was sure.

“I know you,” I cut him off and stared him down.

I moved my hands, controlling the water-Aspis to move.

Kazhi and Bastane were trying to attack, and I beat them back each time, not looking away from Nuo.

“She’s told me of you, as have my worshippers.

‘Shadow and Blood’ is what they call you and the other Guard. ”

Nuo’s nostrils flared as he jumped to his feet, gripping his blades.

So he knew the nickname the Aethar had given him.

It made it all the easier to bait him. “I’m coming for you first, Interrogator .

You’re easy prey. Weaker than the others.

How you became a Guard, I will never know.

When my followers are not at risk, I will come for you.

The fight will be a disappointment, I’m sure.

” I looked him up and down, making it clear I found him lacking.

Nuo screamed, rising to jump toward the water Aspis, but Kazhi stopped him, wrapping an arm around his waist and holding him back. She gave me a concerned look, perhaps wondering why I was tormenting her brother.

“I’ll kill you!” he shouted.

I smiled, and I hated doing it. “Try, Guard. You’re too weak. What a pathetic excuse to defend the beast.”

I prayed the hatred would work. I learned long ago that hate could be used as a driving force to make oneself hard. Hate taught me how to survive the forest and the endless loneliness. Hate fuelled my need to survive, to escape, and to be nothing like the rest of them.

Nuo would hate me more once he realized what Maev and I planned to do, what Kazhi had told us to do. We were stealing their only means of following the beast—Falizha’s empty ship.

The water morphed into a wall again, and I struggled to concentrate on my sorrow while letting him watch my smile grow. “I like borrowing her body,” I said, only for him. “I wonder what secrets I’ll discover while living here.”

Nuo had once trusted me when he trusted so few, and I promised myself I would return to him. We were going to survive this because he was the only one left in Arde I considered my family, and I would not lose him.

He was going to forgive me.

He had to.