Page 49

Chapter

Thirty-Six

Liv

The days that followed his return were a fog, much like the days after his death. I lost myself in the disbelief and the fear of too much hope. Back in the Endless Forest, I learned that if something good happened, you would be punished for it later.

M y cheek stung as I rolled my head on my pillow.

A crystal unstuck itself from where it had lodged into my face and dropped onto the padded fabric, glowing and full of magic.

I stretched, my body feeling less burdened than it had in weeks, and I checked the crystals stuffed around my bed to find a glow emanating from them all.

In a single night, I had filled every crystal.

I stuffed them in my pockets excitedly. I got up to tell Ollo, but before I reached him, my steps slowed, seeing what was outside the large window.

All my excitement from the dream and crystals vanished.

A dull yellow hue bathed the bridge, muting the reflections and casting shadows behind every structure.

“The world is burning.” I stopped behind the control panel, and Ollo looked over his shoulder at me.

The ship had landed in sand, yellow desert stretching out before us. In the distance, large rock formations jutted from the earth, round and nearly hidden in haze.

Maev sat near the front window, putting her hair into braids. “It was hard to tell it was daytime at first due to the smoke,” she said, voice muffled against the glass.

“What’s going on?”

“Like the Guardian in the temple said, South Aspis has burned. We are landing for a bit before we fly through the smoke. It’s spread far, and Ollo made a good point that we don’t want to get caught by anyone and need to land where it’s difficult to breathe.”

“This is all from South Aspis?”

“From surrounding villages, too.”

“The Guards told me South Aspis was where the veteran Guardians trained and guarded Veydes from the Aethar that crossed the canyons. I wonder how many were lost? And those villages …”

The destruction was unimaginable. The lives lost. Who could do this?

“They will blame you, Saviour.” Ollo turned in his seat to face me.

“Based on the maps, it was a large camp.” Maev finished with her hair, standing.

She was peering at the dark sky. “It was built out over a distance, rather than tall buildings like the Guardian City.” Maev’s faded reflection in the window showed her face pulled down in concern. “How are you feeling today, Liv?”

“I feel really good today. The crystals are taking some of the magic, easing the stress.” I approached the front window and stood next to Maev.

She didn’t seem as excited about the news as I thought she would.

“What’s wrong?” I asked.

“Your hair is lighter, near white. You could almost pass for a Day-Leg, from our bloodline.”

Ollo approached the window too, his reflection to my left, Maev’s on my right. The strange colour of the sky had turned the twins’ skin a pale green. We were silent for several moments, watching the smoke swirl outside the ship.

Past the smoke were the canyons, and I remembered what Nuo had said about them.

“ Those who have gone to Aethar lands do not return. The land is as scarred as their faces, and the southern borders of our lands are a maze of canyons, impossible to travel through. If somehow you make it through the maze and the long desert, you won’t go much farther from the violent nature of the Aethars waiting for intruders. ”

Yet, that’s exactly where I was going.

“Any more dreams?” Maev asked quietly. When I turned to her, she added. “Ollo overheard you speaking of them last night. He knows.”

Heat rushed to my face, but his slight smile told me he would not ask me about them.

“Yes. I saw him again,” I said.

“Your boyfriend is chasing you down in every reality,” she said, not teasing. She was worried.

“Are we calling the beast her boyfriend now?” Ollo asked, a shade too dark to be casual.

“We are not,” I replied, ignoring their stares and watching the smoke in the distance.

Ollo put his hands behind his head, peeking over at me.

“You know, before this mission, I was leading a life of peace. I was making handfuls of friends, had achieved an early high ranking in the aerial division, women were giving me attention, and I was worrying less about Maev, who spent too much time alone.”

Maev frowned. “What does any of that have to do with today?”

“I always knew my life was good. I will better appreciate it when I am home. I will appreciate the good days after seeing the worst.”

We were quiet again, perhaps all thinking about our own mortalities.

How fast had the fires burned through South Aspis? How could the Guardians fight against an enemy capable of causing that kind of damage?

“What you’ll appreciate when your home is the welcome party where everyone will sing your praises,” Maev muttered.

Ollo took a deep breath. “I admit, Mae, I enjoy the friends I’ve made and the attention I get.” He clenched his jaw, eyes flashing with regret. “But this trip with you … it’s shown me I’ve neglected my family. That I must change a few things.”

Maev’s mouth popped open. “How very observant of you.”

I should have left them to have this conversation alone, but it was captivating to see siblings who cared—who tried.

“I have observed that you have changed since before we left for the city and went our separate ways.” He gave his sister a thoughtful look. “You’re different than you used to be. When we get home, Mae, I want to make sure we spend more time together.”

“All of our lives have changed,” I added before thinking. I had become so comfortable around these two that my thoughts spilled so easily. “I would like to spend time with you guys, too.”

Maev toyed with the end of her braid. “I am glad of your change of heart, Livy, and that you are not feeling sorry for yourself today, but that doesn’t make this situation any better. You’re infatuated with your enemy.”

“I’m not infatuated,” I muttered.

“Mae,”—Ollo returned to his seat at the control panel—“did you pack the bags as I asked?”

“Bags for what?” I tore myself away from the window.

“Ollo thinks South Aspis is a bad sign. Since you obviously didn’t start the fires, and if the Governor’s daughter is with the Guards, then who caused that much damage? The Southlanders couldn’t overtake that many Guardians.”

“The Guards were always worried a war would start once the Aspis rose. I think it has,” I said.

“But a war between who? No plans were made for South Aspis from the Aerial defences,” Ollo mused.

“It’s why we’ve packed emergency exit bags. We may need to abandon the ship at some point.” Maev moved behind a seat near the panel and patted it for me to sit. When I did, she braided my hair like hers.

“But maybe not if Liv is filling crystals for us. Nice job, by the way.” Ollo winked at me, and I didn’t feel guilty for the attention. Ollo gave it to me freely, asking nothing in return. He made me feel bold. Was that so bad?

Maev dropped the first braid. My hair had grown long enough that it fell over my shoulder, and I looked out into the desert landscape while she worked on the other. I sat in silence, thinking how scary it was out there, yet how safe I felt right now—uncertain of myself, perhaps, but safe.

Was … Brekt out there somewhere? Was he returning as himself and seeing what had become of his lands?

The ache in my chest took my breath away. I wanted to find him, to see him again.

“I’m going to go and make sure I have everything we need packed.” Maev patted my shoulder, dropping my second braid.

Ollo surprised me by turning in his chair toward me. “When we return to Avenmae, I would also like to spend time with you, Saviour.”

“With me?” My voice cracked. “Doing what?”

“Worried I am trying to ask you on a date?” His eyes glittered with mirth. “I want to spend time getting to know each other when we aren’t on the run.”

He held me trapped in his navy-blue gaze. Yet, I didn’t fear Ollo. I had shed my fears. I had become bold, too.

“I want to take you out,” he continued, taking a quick peek behind me to make sure Maev wasn’t listening. “Show you my home. Show you me. I want to get to know you, and … I want to be better.”

“Better?”

Ollo looked down while a hand lifted to the back of his neck.

It was the most unsure I had seen him. A crease formed between his brows as he took a deep breath.

“I want to be someone who is missed. I want someone to fray the edges of a photo of me while I am gone. I want to earn that affection, not because I can do great things. I want someone to miss me because I was good. And all the other things you’ve said about your Guard.

” Ollo placed his hands on his knees. “Maybe it’s strange that I ask such a thing of you.

But after his return—I—I think you understand what love is.

Something I have yet to fully figure out. ”

“Why do you say that?”

“You don’t mince words with him. Or with the Interrogator. Just as Maev doesn’t with me. You are a strong woman who loves deeply. I want to know how to fill that role in someone’s life.”

Ollo was talking of a specific woman. I bent forward, laying a hand over his, and it tensed beneath my touch. “I think you are already in the hearts of the most important people. You don’t have to improve.”

His jaw clenched, about to argue.

“You don’t. I know something was said to you once. I’m guessing from an old lover. Maybe she was right in the moment. But from what I see, you are a really good man.”

Ollo’s grim demeanour changed, growing soft. “Are you flirting with me, Saviour?”

My neck grew warm. “No, I was telling you what I think. Maybe you have an ego, but it’s not in the way of you being good.”

“I plan to save you, Liv. They say the host dies … between Maev and I, we will make sure to save you.”

I couldn’t control the overwhelming gratitude. “I don’t know what my future holds, but I intend to save myself. And now that I know the Shadow Guard isn’t dead …” I wrung my hands together. “I plan to save him, too.”

“Are you telling me I am aiding in this quest to save your past lover, who happens to be my enemy?”

“Depending on your perspective.”

Ollo barked a laugh. “I like your form of manipulation, Saviour. I will help you. If the Shadow Guard is saved, well, that’s not something I will stop you from doing.”

“Because you are a good man.”

“The bags are all ready to go.” Maev returned to the bridge, taking a seat next to me.

Ollo stood, taking one last look out the window. “I’m going to get changed for the day, and then we will head through the cloud. It’s getting quite hot, too hot for these long-sleeved Guardian shirts. I think they have some lighter ones here somewhere.”

“Your hair has gotten very long.” Maev grabbed a length of braid and tugged on it as Ollo left.

I admired how intricate the weaving was. “You’re very good with styling it.” And then, I asked before thinking, “Does Ollo have a girlfriend?”

Maev scrunched her nose at me. “Why? Are you asking for your own sake?”

My face fell. “You think the day after the Shadow Guard returns is when I will go after your brother?”

“There are constantly women asking about him. You could be, too.” Maev pursed her lips and stared.

“Does Ollo get mad when his friends flirt with you?”

Maev quickly changed her features, looking away shyly. “They haven’t. No, they—they wouldn’t.”

“Does Ollo get pissed about the guy you went to school with?”

Her cheeks went pink. “You remember him? He’s too busy for me, but …”

“But what?”

“I’m not good at this girl talk.” Her shoulder slumped. “We had a night together. But we didn’t … Have you ever, umm …”

“Had sex?” I asked bluntly.

Instead of blushing, she gave me a terse nod. “I don’t have girl friends. Have you—um—were you and the Guard together like that?”

Somehow, she sat stubbornly, angry that she had to ask, but I could tell she was trying to get to know me better, and I shook my head.

“Only with one man, and it wasn’t him. I think if I had been with the Guard, with Brekt, he would have ruined all men for me.

” I checked to see if Ollo was back yet, embarrassed at where the conversation had gone.

“So tell me about this guy,” I said, hoping such a simple topic as men would be enough to distract myself from the one I was desperate to find.

“You’re not talking of Hanold, are you?” I jumped.

Ollo had returned wearing lighter clothing, still in black.

Maev’s irritation was immediate. “So what if I am?”

“He’s too dumb for you.”

Ollo’s flippant remark sent Maev into a fluster. “We were in the same tech class. He can’t be that much dumber than me.”

“Cause his uncle was a professor. He had the lowest grades and spent more time on his hair than his studies.”

“Whatever,” Maev huffed. “Yes, I like him. He is smart, and he’s interested in the same things as me.” She turned to me and said in a low voice, “And a fantastic kisser.”

Ollo stopped in his tracks, a look of disgust coming over him.

“Seriously?” Maev’s hands shot to her hips as she stood. “I’m supposed to say nothing when you make eyes at the Ikhor, but you can’t deal with the fact I kissed a guy?”

“Are there any men you do approve of?” I asked Ollo, trying to end their bickering.

He shrugged. “What can I say? I actually care for my sister’s future.”

“Well, you don’t have to worry about Hanold out here.” She spun in a circle, motioning to the mess we’d made on the bridge. “I’m quite safe.”

I wondered about Maev’s men and what they were like while trying to ignore the emotional mess I was in. I thought of spending time with Ollo in his city, alone.

Without realizing it, my fingers stroked the picture in my pocket.

I let go, standing and heading to the front window for a better view of the sand-covered horizon.

I reached the glass, gazing out into the smoke-filled desert.

It was a scene I had never imagined back home in my cold and bleak forest. This place, though desolate, made me feel bigger, part of something important.

The desert seemed to stretch endlessly, and I was sure, through the cloud of smoke, it went on until it disappeared behind the horizon.

To the left, massive rock formations rose towards the sky.

On the right, shapes hid in the smoke. I inched closer to the window, squinting.

One shape, in particular, moved in the dark cloud.

It wasn’t the swirling shadow I had been hallucinating these past few weeks, and my cheek pressed against the cold glass to see better. “Safe isn’t the word I would use, Maev. We are all dead meat.”

“What do you mean?” She looked to where I was pointing.

“The Guards have caught up.”