Page 36

“Tell me everything and leave not a single detail out,” Mandy says once the door closes behind Travis and Harper.

“He said some mean things and I said some mean things back and I regret it but I can’t change it,” I ramble. She has her own story to tell considering she’s wearing the same clothes she wore last night to the Gridiron and I haven’t seen her in nearly twenty-four hours.

She grabs the brown paper bag she set on the counter a few minutes ago and brings it over to the couch, where I’m currently collapsing. She pulls a bottle of Tito’s out, cracks the cap, and hands it over to me to take the first sip.

I chug a bit more than necessary before handing it back, and the burn feels good as it spreads warmth through my chest.

“Start from the beginning,” she suggests as she takes the bottle from me and chugs her own sip.

I blow out a breath. “So I heard this knocking on the door, and it was Harper. She was crying and scared, and I guess she walked from Travis’s place here.”

Mandy’s brows dip. “Where does he live?”

I shrug. “No idea. She said he keeps threatening to pull her from Stratford and find her a new school, and it’s like the one stable thing in her life right now that she actually likes, and she didn’t know where else to go.”

“How’d she find you here?” Mandy asks.

“I was showing her how to message me in my office one day if she ever needed me and I shared my location with her to show her how that works when we were at school. I never imagined she’d actually track me down.”

“Jeez. Poor girl.” She hands the bottle back to me.

I nod before I take a sip, and then I say, “I think she just really misses her mom, you know? Can you imagine how hard it is for a kid that age to lose both parents and have to move to a different state with a father she never met? Not only did she lose both her parents, but then she finds out her dad wasn’t really her dad…it’s all so messed up, but she’s a special little girl and I just want to help however I can but he keeps pushing me away.” I sniffle a little as I feel the burn of tears threatening. I hate that I’ve become so attached to her in such a short time, but I care about her. I want to help her succeed, and while it’s not my place to parent her, I want to be there for her in whatever way she needs me.

“I get it.” She takes the bottle back for another swig. “Maybe he’s pushing you away because he’s scared, too. His life just got flipped upside down, you know? And we’ve both dealt with rough cases in our careers, but there’s something really special about that little girl.”

I press my lips together as I consider her point that maybe he’s scared, too. She’s right, but I don’t want to defend him right now. I’m too angry with him. “There is. I did my best to let her know she can always trust me but that I had to call her father, and she eventually relented. I think part of her wanted to scare him, and she succeeded. You should’ve seen his face when he walked in. He looked so scared that I just wanted to hug him.”

“You wanted to hug him because he looked scared? Or because you wanted to feel his body pressed up against yours again?” she asks, a little sly smile playing at her lips.

“Stop.” My voice is a little tired, as if I can’t quite muster up the denial to her claim because she’s partially right. “I just…” I shake my head. “He’s such a jerk, and I hate him, but…”

“But you want his penis inside your vagina?” she guesses.

I can’t help a laugh at her words. “No. I want his tongue up in there first.”

“I knew it!”

“I don’t understand it, though. I hate him so much but when those blue eyes fall on me…” I trail off as I picture them in my mind…as I picture his lips on mine like last night, as I remember how he smelled. I sigh. “I could just get lost in them, you know?”

“You’re a smitten kitten. What are you going to do about it?”

I shrug. “Nothing. I’m going to keep his little girl safe when she’s in my care, and I’m going to ignore the attraction I have to him. It’s my only choice after the things he said to me tonight.”

“What did he say?”

“That he has a little black book full of women who won’t reject him the way I do.” I don’t admit how much those words cut into me.

“Ouch. You think he’s fucking around all over town still with a kid now?”

“I have no idea.” I chug more from the bottle, but it doesn’t seem to help ease the ache in my chest. “I think I’m starting to have real feelings for him, but it doesn’t matter. It’s not like I can do anything about it.”

“Sure you can. Why not take the shot? What are you scared of?”

“I’ve seen how just his words can affect me. I can’t imagine what sort of emotional suicide I’ll be making if I were to actually get involved with him. Besides, there’s a kid in the picture. It’s not so simple, you know?” I point out.

“Yeah, but kids are resilient.”

“She’s been through enough,” I say firmly, as if that’ll end the subject.

I should know better. Mandy always gets the last word.

“And she could probably use a steady female figure presence more often in her life…especially if she’s running away from him to you on the weekend,” she points out.

I sigh, and then I change the subject. “So what happened after I left the Gridiron last night?”

Her cheeks burn pink. “Oh man, do I have a story to tell.”

I raise a brow, glad that the attention is off me for a change.

“So Jaxon and I were flirting all night, and he bought me some more drinks, and good God he’s smooth, and we made out in the booth a little so he could preview the things he can do with his tongue, and then he invited me back to his place for another drink, and then I gargled his ten-inch dick for a bit, and I slept over but we didn’t have sex, just the oral stuff, and the things he can do with his tongue?” She kisses her fingertips. “Chef’s kiss.”

I’m cackling by the time she’s done with her explanation. “You gargled his dick?” I repeat.

She giggles, too. “Sorry, would you prefer I say I gave him a blow job?” She gets all serious for a beat as she says it with the most formality she can muster.

“Ten inches, huh?” I ask, twisting my lips as I consider that. “So when are you going to bang?”

“He had somewhere to go tonight, but he invited me to dinner tomorrow.”

“Whoa, already?”

She shrugs. “It’s the gargling. He was a big, big fan. It’s not the first time I’ve been told I give good head.”

I giggle. “Too much information, my friend.”

She elbows me. “Never too much. So when are you gonna slob Woods’s knob?”

I wrinkle my nose. “Half past never?”

“Wrong answer. What do you have to lose?”

I think about that for a beat. There’s an awful lot to lose if I shoot a real shot with Travis Woods. My heart, for one. Harper’s heart, for two.

Do I think what we could have would be explosive and powerful?

For sure.

But do I also think the inevitable end of it would be horrific, particularly with a child involved?

Absolutely.

And I’m just not ready to set myself up for that sort of failure.