Page 10 of See the Stars

‘I can’t believe I have to go home for the holidays tomorrow,’ said Alice to Zelda.

They were in a relatively quiet area of the student union bar, but it was the last night of term before the Christmas break, the bar was busy and Alice was drunk.

‘Uni has been so awesome, like living in a magic bubble. And if I leave, I worry I won’t be able to get back in again. ’

‘You’re right,’ said Zelda. ‘If you pierce the surface of a bubble, it will pop.’

‘I knew you’d understand.’ Alice smiled at Zelda, who despite the heat was fully hatted to insulate herself from the ambient noise. They’d become inseparable in the first term and Alice was going to miss her new friend intensely. ‘It has been brilliant, though, hasn’t it?’

Zelda seemed to consider this for a moment. ‘It has been better than I thought it might be,’ she admitted.

‘But you can’t stay here on your own at Christmas,’ said Alice.

‘You sound like my mother,’ said Zelda, fiddling with her bracelets. ‘I can and I will. I’ll tell my mum I’m going to my imaginary boyfriend’s house.’

‘But you’re a terrible liar,’ pointed out Alice.

‘True,’ said Zelda. ‘But this is a lie she’ll want to believe. She likes the idea that I’m a normal girl.’ She took a sip of her tonic water. ‘It’s like she’s never met me.’

‘You could have a boyfriend if you wanted one.’

‘I don’t,’ said Zelda. She put her tonic down. ‘I’m going to have a lovely time right here. The book I wanted on igneous rock formations in south-west China has finally come in.’

‘I don’t know how you can possibly study boring old stones when there’s a whole universe out there,’ said Alice, starting a familiar argument that always cheered them both up.

‘I’m going to learn more about the universe from my rocks than you ever are from your telescopes.

You know why?’ Zelda asked. Alice did, but she shrugged so that her friend would continue.

‘Because I can pick rocks up. Study them. Break them into pieces and look at what’s inside.

All you can do is take a wild guess, because your stuff is millions of light years away and if you got close enough to a star to take a proper look, it would burn you to a crisp before you could say “Zelda was right”. ’

‘I’ll never say that,’ laughed Alice.

‘That’s right, because you’ll be a crisp, and crisps can’t talk.’ Zelda smiled.

‘And what about when this planet eventually becomes uninhabitable?’ asked Alice, swirling the straw around in her glass so that the ice chinked. ‘What good will your stones do you when the sun explodes into a supernova and earth can no longer support life?’

‘Ah, your exoplanet ambitions again,’ said Zelda.

‘Trying to find somewhere habitable that we could one day relocate to. Completely unnecessary. This planet has five billion years left, give or take a few million. And of course, if humanity has the same life expectancy as the average species of mammal, then we’ll have disappeared within a million years anyway, so we’ll all be long gone before we’re in need of a new planet.

’ She took another sip of her tonic. ‘And that’s if a super volcano doesn’t erupt and suffocate us all before we could even board a spaceship. ’

‘You’re in a good mood,’ said Alice.

‘Just being realistic,’ said Zelda. She adjusted her hat. ‘But perhaps your exoplanet would be useful for the next dominant species.’

‘Well exactly,’ said Alice with a laugh. ‘We can build a tiny spaceship and a map for the ants.’ She paused. ‘Still, it would be quite something, wouldn’t it? If we found an alternative planet that could support life.’

‘There are probably lots,’ said Zelda. ‘But they will be so far away we’ll never find any of them.’

‘Well, geologists aren’t always right,’ said Alice.

‘We are right more often than astrophysicists. We do have actual evidence . . . ’

‘Evidence is cheating,’ said Alice with a smile. ‘It’s much more exciting to have a theory . . . ’

‘A guess.’

‘An educated guess. Then other people can have a go at disproving it, and if no one manages, we decide that we’re probably right.’

‘I’d still rather examine a rock,’ said Zelda.

‘And that’s why we’re such a good team.’

‘Hey, girls, there you are.’ It was Callum. ‘Nice hat, Zelda, is it new?’

‘You’ve seen me wear this one at least four times,’ replied Zelda.

‘She looks great,’ said Alice, her voice warm.

‘So do you,’ said Callum. Alice coloured. A new song came on. ‘I love this one,’ he said. ‘Let’s dance.’

Alice looked at Zelda. ‘Shall we?’

‘No,’ said Zelda.

‘It will be fun.’

‘If you two want to kiss, I don’t see why you have to gyrate around each other first,’ said Zelda. ‘And I don’t want to be involved.’

‘We don’t want to kiss.’ Alice felt herself blushing.

‘Speak for yourself,’ said Callum.

‘You two always kiss when Alice has had more than four vodka and Cokes,’ said Zelda. ‘And she’s had five.’

‘I feel special now,’ laughed Callum. He pulled more insistently on Alice’s hand. ‘Come on,’ he said. ‘Let’s gyrate.’

*

Alice sat on the train from Edinburgh. She had a Coke and a bag of crisps sitting on the table in front of her and she was debating with herself whether eating would make her feel better or worse.

She couldn’t feel worse, she decided, and opened the packet.

The motion of the train was horrible, but the greasy salt did cut through some of her hangover.

She took a swig of Coke, and for a moment she felt normal again, then she had a flashback to snogging Callum on the dance floor while his rowing buddies cheered, and she felt dreadful again.

She’d lost Zelda midway through the night, but her friend had magically reappeared with Alice’s coat when it was time to leave the union, and had helped her back home. Like she always did.

Alice had two weeks of Christmas holiday in front of her before she went back to Edinburgh for the new year.

She missed Zelda already. Perhaps, if she were honest with herself, she’d miss Callum a little too.

She’d certainly miss the lectures, and although she’d packed her suitcase so full of books from the university library she’d struggled to get it on board the train, it was no substitute for the live learning the university provided.

Even her grandfather’s telescope didn’t seem as appealing as it used to. She’d had time in the university observatory and had seen things she’d never thought possible. Looking through his old lens would feel like putting on glasses with the wrong prescription.

She took another sip of her drink. There were a few things she was looking forward to. Her mother’s roast dinners. The smell of the open air. And the look on her grandfather’s face when she told him what she’d seen in the skies.

‘We’ve all missed you.’ Alice’s mum was at the front door to greet her. Alice felt she was being inspected for changes.

‘Merry Christmas,’ she said, leaning in to accept her mother’s hug. ‘Where’s Grandpa?’

Sheila lowered her voice. ‘He’s in the kitchen,’ she said. ‘But before you go in there, remember what I said. He gets a bit confused sometimes. It’s worse than the last time you saw him.’

‘I can’t wait to tell him about the university telescope,’ said Alice, hurrying past her.

‘Did you hear me?’ Sheila called after her. ‘Listen, he has good days and bad. You’ve been gone for months. Don’t worry if he doesn’t recognise you at first.’

Alice felt sick at that thought, the crisps she’d had on the train seeming to travel back up her gullet. She swallowed and tried to pull herself together as she walked into the kitchen.

‘Alice!’ said her grandfather. He remained seated but opened his arms. Relief flooded through her. Her mum had been overreacting; he was fine. She went to hug him, burying her face in his leathery neck. ‘I’m so old now,’ he said, with a smile. ‘But there’s life in the old cat yet.’

‘Dog,’ said Alice.

‘What? Come on, come out to the shed.’

‘Let Alice get settled in first,’ said Sheila, her voice gentle. ‘She’ll want to see her brother too.’

‘Nonsense. She can come with me.’

‘It’s time for your medication,’ said Sheila, her voice patient. ‘No fuss this time.’

‘Medication schmedication,’ said her grandpa. ‘That stuff makes me sleepy.’

‘You’re eighty-nine,’ said Sheila. ‘Everything makes you sleepy.’

‘Pah.’

‘Sit down. I’ll finish off the lunch and then call Eddy down. If you’re still awake, you can talk to them both.’

‘She’s so strict with me,’ said her grandpa. ‘This wife of mine.’

‘Daughter,’ corrected Sheila gently. ‘And it’s for your own good.’