Page 142 of Remiss

“Megan told her.” Another certainty.

Panic entered Knox’s eyes, but Christopher held up his hand and explained how he knew that Roxanne was aware of the truth.

“She’s never once said anything to me.”

“Your woman don’t hold grudges. If she mad, she hand out her punishments and let it the fuck go. Almost losing Kendall was so fuckin’ hard on her. She probably don’t want to revisit that trauma. And, fuck, if she start talkin’ to you about what the fuck you did, she might cut the fuck out of you. Be thankful she let it go.”

“It just doesn’t seem like Roxanne. Kendall’s one of her babies. She’d hand me my ass on a platter.”

“Not if Megan ain’t told her right away.” Christopher’s stomach growled. As far as he was concerned, the matter was settled. “Now is you fuckin’ finished cuz I’m fuckin’ hungry.”

“C’mon,” Knox grumbled and stalked back to his house.

Sighing, Christopher followed, suddenly hoping Roxanne had made her delicious praline pancakes. Once he walked into the house and closed the door, he breathed in the scent of bacon and maple syrup with an underlay of the cinnamon and apples air freshener she favored. It was nice and toasty inside with the sounds of a family preparing for breakfast.

All at once that lost feeling rose inside of him again. He was too hungry not to eat, so he’d scarf his food then get back home and pray Megan called.

“You coming in the kitchen, boy?” Roxanne called.

“I’m fuckin’ comin’,” Christopher grumbled, unsure why she had the power to make him feel like a small kid. Fuck, she wasn’t even that much older than him. “I ain’t gonna be too long,” he said as he reached the kitchen and found Val sitting at the island with a goddamn mega stack of pancakes. “You left some for me, assfuck, cuz I—”

She came out of nofuckingwhere, swinging that goddamn broom like a motherfucking battle ax. The first blow landed on Christopher’s back and stunned the fuck out of him. The second blow on his chest sent him fucking running.

“Boy, if you ever put your motherfucking hands on Meggie again, I will cut those motherfuckers the fuck off,” Roxanne snarled, chasing him and beating the fuck out of him with that broom.

She hit him again. Christopher covered his head and tried to reach the back door, but she swung that motherfucking handle like she was a batter at the plate, whacking his bicep.He was so fucking glad his leather jacket had a thick lining. However, he didn’t trust her not to break his fucking hand if he touched the knob again, so he started toward the other side.

Somefuckinhow, she met him head-on and raised the broom above her head, ready to crown him. She must’ve run in the opposite direction.

Christopher raised his hands in surrender, various parts of his body stinging like a motherfucker. “I ain’t ever doin’ what I did again to Megan,” he swore. “Just put the fuckin’ broom down.”

She narrowed her eyes.

Swallowing, he took a step back.

“I never took you for a dirty, low-down motherfucker, Outlaw,” she said. “But you picking up that little girl, shaking her, and then dropping her is beyond fucking comprehension.”

“You did that, Outlaw?” Val asked, as appalled as Christopher felt hearing Roxanne and seeing the look in her eyes. “Puff must not know.”

“She doesn’t,” Roxanne confirmed. “Meggie told me.”

“I’m sorry,” Christopher said, his pervasive guilt making him lash out. “But I’m so fuckin’ tired of this same shit. First, CJ. Now, you. This between Megan and me. I ain’t gonna do it no more, but I was goin’ through shit, too.”

If she narrowed her motherfucking eyes anyfuckinmore, she wouldn’t be able to fucking see. She readjusted her position, swung, and hit the side of his head so fucking hard, he saw stars. It all happened so fucking fast, he couldn’t react.

“You’re lost your motherfucking mind, standing there like a fucking bitch, feeling sorry for yourself and making excuses. Kindness, motherfucker, is free.Free, and you haven’t given Meggie much of it lately. Love is precious. The love you two had was on a different level—”

“Had?” Christopher asked. “What the fuck you meanhad? She ain’t lovin’ on me no more?”

She hit his stomach and sent him running again. Motherfuckers jumped out of the way of her swinging fucking broom.

“Motherfucker,” she snarled. “Feeling sorry for yourself ass bitch!” She swung and hit himsomefuckingwhere. He was in too much pain to realize where. “You want sympathy and empathy when you haven’t shown Meggie none!Empathyis human. It humanizes you. That’s what made Meggie love you so much. You showed her what she hadn’t gotten anywhere else. Show her some now and you might get your woman back.”

Christopher put the sofa between him and Roxanne. “She still might not forgive me. That’ll heal us. Her fuckin’ forgiveness. Whatever we goin’ through. Forgiveness is healin’ ‘cuz when I forgave Big Joe the wound inside me closed up. It freed me.”

Roxanne considered that, then swung again, hitting his shoulder.

“You get forgiveness when you deserve it.”