Page 101 of Remiss

She giggled again, then burped, and laughed wildly. Somehow, her chuckles turned into sobs. Deep, gut-wrenching sobs that she couldn’t stop.

Suddenly, arms encircled her. She hadn’t heard that dark gray door opening, but she knew it was Roxy because of the coconut and bergamot she favored.

“It’s okay, sugar.”

Kendall held on tighter. “It isn’t, Roxy. Because I can’t do it anymore. I can’t stay with Johnnie. I tell myself I’m giving him one last chance by going home and trying to convince him to work with me. He won’t do it, though. He’s such a fuckhead.”

“I won’t deny that.”

“I don’t want to leave. Despite everything, I love Johnnie, but I just can’t stay. Not under the circumstances.”

“Sugar—”

“I know you’re going to tell me to talk to Outlaw. Christopher,” she amended glumly.

“That’s the last motherfucker I want you to talk to right now,” Roxy snapped. “Not until after I punch him in his fucking mouth and cut off his fucking hands.”

Kendall snapped her brows together. “What did he do?”

Sniffing, Roxy scooted back and folded her arms. “Let’s focus on you right now.”

Squinting, Kendall considered what Roxy was to do to Meggie’s husband. Punch him in his mouth. He had spoken horrendously to his wife. But cut off his hands? “Did he hit Meggie?”

“No,” Roxy grouched, then explained what hediddo.

“So, let me get this straight? He screamed at Meggie, manhandled her, and hid shit from her?”

“All in one fucking evening,” Roxy confirmed.

“They are all fucking assholes,” Kendall seethed. “Except Mortician.”

“And Val.”

Kendall nodded. “I’ll agree with that.”

“Digger hasn’t been the nicest recently, but we can give him a pass, too.”

“No the fuck we can’t,” Kendall snarled, detailing Digger’s fucking crimes.

“Lawd Jesus, I’m about to catch a case in this motherfucker,” Roxy said. “Are you serious, Kendall?”

“Very,” she grumbled, rapidly sobering.

“These motherfuckers are out of hand.”

“They are. But Johnnie is the worst of the lot. He’s betrayed the club and…Mattie’s afraid of him.” Kendall started to sob again. “Did you hear my baby talk about her own father? I can’t stay under those circumstances.”

“I thought he was getting better.”

“I thought so too. But she sounded so sad and distraught. I think…I think she’ll be perfectly happy living with me and her brothers somewhere else.”

“Johnnie is going to give you a lot of push back, baby.”

“Not if I leave Rory,” Kendall whispered, deflating again. “Rory loves me, but it’s Johnnie who has his complete devotion. He sees nothing wrong with protecting that motherfucker, even though he’s endangering his own life.” She crawled closer to Roxy and leaned her head on her shoulder. “What do I do?” she said hoarsely. “Rory needs me too. I can be a buffer when Johnnie leaves him out to hang. He’s a minor as well. If I walk away and leave him, that will affect him. If I force him to come with me, that will affect him. But my sweet, beautiful Mattie. Idon’t know all the particulars of what happened with those two assholes and I’m waiting for her to open up. However, it can’t be easy for her with Johnnie acting as he has been. What do I do? How do I protect my sons and my daughter?”

“Three years is a long time to suffer Johnnie’s behavior, sugar. When Rory turns eighteen, he’ll be an adult. If you want to leave with Mattie, JJ, and Blade, it’ll be up to him to choose. You wouldn’t abandon him, and you wouldn’t force him to your will.”

“Do you think I’m a bad person for wanting to leave Johnnie?”