Page 103 of Remiss

“Most of all, baby, remember that it’s okay to change your mind. If that motherfucker finds his fucking brain again and earns your trust again, becomes the father that Mattie deserves, and you decide you want to stay, no one will hold it against you.”

“And sex?”

“Do you want sex with him?”

“Sometimes. Recently, though, I don’t. He isn’t the man I re-committed myself to after my recovery. He doesn’t deserve my body.”

“If that’s how you feel, that’s what you do.”

“If he cheats, I’m leaving sooner than three years.”

“If that motherfucker cheats, I’ll help you leave whenever that is.”

“Thank you so much, Roxy. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“I’m not going anywhere, so you won’t have to find out, sugar.” She nodded toward the pillow. “Under the covers, missy.”

Smiling, Kendall scrambled to do Roxy’s bidding. The moment her head hit the pillow, Roxy pulled the covers over Kendall and tucked her in, then kissed the top of her head.

“Sweet dreams, baby.”

Kendall smiled sleepily, the stress of the day and the copious amounts of wine finally catching up. “Same to you, Roxy,” she whispered, and closed her eyes.

Christopher stared at the ceiling, clutching his cell phone and praying Megan called him. He was happy Bailey brought food and Celia helped to serve it, but there was nothing like having Megan there, fussing over him, at his right hand.

Kissing him. Loving him. Teasing him.

Loving him.

Wanting to be in his company.

“Baby, please,” he whispered into the dark silence.

If he went on a run and she stayed behind, his motel room would be in total darkness. She needed a nightlight. He hated those motherfuckers. Tonight, though, he was even more restless in the dark.

Besides, her staying away from him a second night astounded him. Fuck, it frightened the fuck out of him. Suppose she really meant to stay away until her surgery?

Fuck! Suppose she went through with the surgery?

He never would’ve…fuck, he’d already told himself this.

He’d done a fucking lot and might’ve lost Megan because of it.

His blood ran cold and he stiffened, unable to imagine her not coming back to him. She was at Mort’s LA mansion. They had a house phone, but Christopher was afraid to call and piss her off more.

Any other time, he would’ve blazed to LA and…

What fucking other time? When the fuck had Meganleft him? Once, when he’d been acting like a supreme assfuck after she lost Patrick, she’dalmostleft. And she would’ve if he hadn’t come to his fucking senses.

How could he have forgotten those feelings? First, when she’d been guiding CJ out the door and again when she’d beat the fuck out of him at a party he’d banned her from? Both times had put the fucking fear of God in him.

How the fuck could he have taken her for granted?Whenthe fuck had he began taking her for granted?

Turning on his side, he reached out to her empty spot. “I love you so fuckin’ much, Megan. I’m so fuckin’ sorry. Come home.Please. You…”

Nausea twisted in his gut and fear spread through his veins like poison. Gripping her pillow, he pulled it to his nose and sniffed. Immediately, his cock stiffened and his heart sped up.

“You my everyfuckinthing,” he said into the silence for thecountless time, hoping love bridged the gap. “I need you so fuckin’ much. I want you. I love you. I miss you.”