Page 37 of Playmaker
Maddie
I put off packing until the last minute, and now I’m racing around my room like a madwoman trying to get all these clothes shoved inside my suitcase.
After my mom tried to console me yesterday, I spent the night crying into my pillow and stuffing my face with ice cream. I didn’t want to tell Maya or Ethan about what happened. They went on a date last night, and I didn’t want to ruin it. Telling them Cameron and I are over and speaking the words aloud will make it real, and I’m not ready for that yet.
Plus, admitting I was wrong is like pulling teeth for me. They both warned me, and I ignored all the signs because some idiotic part of me thought it could work between us.
The joke’s on me.
Cameron called four times last night but I didn’t have the strength to answer. Hearing his voice would only make this more difficult than it needs to be. I still want him as part of my life, but it’ll take some time before we can get to the point where things return to being platonic.
I’m attempting to sit on my suitcase when knocks on the doorway pull me from my failing effort. Ethan strides into the room, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest, lips pursed into a frown. We haven’t spoken since he decked Cameron at the canyon, and I don’t plan on starting now.
“Is there a reason you’re in my room?” I ask, aggressively removing a sweater and tossing it to the floor.
“I wanted to apologize to you.”
My eyes shoot up to his, the aggressive unpacking coming to a halt. “Come again?” An apology from my brother is like finding a needle in a haystack.
An impossibly rare occurrence.
“I’m apologizing,” he reiterates. “I shouldn’t have punched Cameron when I’m doing the same thing with Maya. He’s my best friend, and regardless of his track record, I should have listened and heard you both out. Although it’ll take some getting used to, I’ll be fine with it eventually.”
I force a smile, swallowing thickly when he comes to the bed to help me zip my suitcase. Little does he know there’s nothing to be okay with anymore. Fighting on those rocks was all for nothing, and soon enough, things will go back to how they used to be.
“Thanks,” I manage to reply. When I’m ready to talk to him about it, I will. For now, I need to heal through this heartbreak on my own. “That means a lot, Ethan. I know apologizing isn’t your strong suit, but if I’m being honest, I owe an apology to you too. You went about things with Maya the right way, and I’m sorry I wasn’t more considerate of your feelings before starting things with Cameron. You deserved better than that from me.”
“I appreciate that,” he says. “So, are we good now?”
“We’re good,” I confirm.
After another two attempts, we finally manage to get my suitcase shut, and he hauls it off for the bed for me, taking a glance around the room. “Are you all packed?”
I nod, looking for anything I might have missed. “Yep. That was the last of it.”
“Well, you better get going then. He’s outside waiting.”
“Dad? I thought Mom was driving me to the airport.”
Ethan stares at me as if I’m losing it. “No, Cameron is. We pulled in at the same time, but I asked if I could talk to you first before you leave.”
Cameron .
Cameron is here .
Outside .
“I’m confused,” my brother continues. “Didn’t you know he was taking you?”
I thought he was leaving for school today too. I thought he’d be long gone by now, not outside in my driveway waiting for me. Ethan apparently doesn’t know we broke up, so I have to act like everything is fine until I figure out what Cameron’s here for.
And despite me chastising my heart to stop getting ahead of itself, it’s beating like a drum at the possibility of why Cameron would show up here unexpectedly.
Stop it , I warn. It doesn’t mean he changed his mind .
“No, I did. I just forgot.”
“You forgot,” Ethan enunciates slowly, clearly not believing me.
“Yeah. I probably shouldn’t keep him waiting, though. I’ll be back.” My palms are sweaty, and my heart is racing when I leave Ethan behind in my bedroom and try to walk calmly down the stairs. I’m a trembling mess as I step onto the porch, seeing Cameron leaning against the hood of his car. He’s twirling something between his fingertips, seeming deep in thought, but as soon as he hears the front door click shut behind me, his eyes lift to mine, and then he smiles .
It’s such a switch from the version I saw yesterday that I almost don’t believe it’s him, but that smile can only belong to one person, and those green eyes are ones that live in every fantasy I have. He’s wearing a white T-shirt that’s snug to his muscled body and a backward white cap holds his curls at bay. That damn chain glistens beneath the sunlight, and damn him for making me feel like this. Damn him for breaking my heart and showing up here as if nothing happened. Damn my heart for ignoring the heartbreak and instead trying to persuade me to run right into his arms.
Traitorous bastard .
“Hi,” he says softly.
“What are you doing here?” I’m rooted on the porch, unable to move another muscle until he tells me why the hell he showed up.
He flinches at the hurt behind my words, but the breath gets stuck in my throat when he opens his palm, showcasing a crystal. Not just any crystal, but the crystal I gave him after his mom passed. I assumed he threw it away after he told me to get lost that day, but he kept it.
“It’s always been you,” he whispers so softly I almost don’t hear him. “You check all the boxes, Maddie.”
“I . . .what does that mean?”
When he takes a step closer, I try to control my breathing, but it’s useless. I’m a panting mess as the distance closes between us, fully consumed by every word that leaves his lips.
“You’ve always seen the very best in me even when I gave you no reason to. You cared enough to give me this crystal when I pushed you away. You thought I was hot even with my braces and my obsession with Pokémon cards because you liked me for me, and I’m so fucking sorry it took me this long to realize it.”
Tears well in my eyes as he continues to turn the crystal in his hand, a symbol of how much he’s cared about me over the years. It’s something so small, but it holds the weight of the world in this moment.
“You have every reason to turn me down, but I told my dad there can’t be an ultimatum. He came home last night, and for the first time, I was honest with him. You were right about me standing in my own way, and I don’t want to be that person anymore, so I did something about it. I’m going to put in the effort to become the man you need because you’re worth it. We are worth it, and although I have no idea what the future holds, I promise to fight like hell to ensure we make it because—” He’s right in front of me now, eyes locked on mine when he says, “I’m in love with you, Maddie Davis. I always have been, and I always will be.”
The breath whooshes from my lungs. If it wasn’t for his hands coming out to steady me, I might fall over from the admission.
“I don’t deserve it, but if you give me another chance, you won’t regret it. I’ll never break your heart again.”
I laugh, and it’s such a bad moment to do it, but I can’t help myself.
Cameron seems concerned. “I can’t tell if you laughing is a good or a bad thing.”
“I’m sorry,” I say with another giggle. Tears are threatening to spill but I hold them back when I add, “It’s just funny that you think I would ever be able to say no to you.”
Finally, that arrogant grin I used to hate appears on his face, and I decide I never want it to disappear again. I want it to stay put forever.
“Is that a yes, then? You’ll give me another shot?”
I hook my arms around his neck and he lifts me off the ground so my legs can wrap around his waist. It’s a little awkward with my walking boot, but the extra weight doesn’t seem to faze him. In his arms, I feel whole, and right now, I realize it was useless for him to ask me where I wanted to live after college. The truth is, anywhere he goes, I’ll gladly follow because home isn’t a place. It’s with him .
“I love you, Cameron Holden. Always have, always will.”
His cheeky grin grows wider before he kisses me, and like the heavens above want to get in on the celebration, a beam of sunlight hits us both, encasing us in a blanket of warmth. The locket around my neck shimmers, and Cameron pulls away to squint into the sky. I’m not sure what happened in the past twenty-four hours to give him this revelation, but the acceptance that he seems to have fills me with joy.
In the long run, it doesn’t matter what made him get to this point.
I’m just glad he did.
—
Two hours later we’re on the interstate, my suitcases packed in the back of Cameron’s car. The windows are rolled down, whipping my curls in all directions, and Cameron has one hand on the steering wheel, the other on my thigh. After explaining more about the conversation with his dad, Cameron told me he’s not flying out until later tonight so they can spend some much needed time together, so I’m grateful he wanted to take the time to drive me to the airport.
A long-distance relationship is going to be an entirely different battle, but with the love we have for one another, I’m confident we can make it work. We’ve gone through far worse than distance, and if anything, we’ve proved we can overcome it.
I turn to admire the profile of my insanely hot boyfriend. His jaw is working overtime chewing gum, and his sunglasses make him look sexier than usual. His thumb strokes my thigh in calming, happy patterns, and the sky remains a bright blue with no clouds in sight.
Our future may still have uncertainties, but today?
Today is a good day, and I’m going to enjoy every second of it.
That’s why, when Cameron leans over to switch on the radio, I allow the country music to play at full blast.