Page 73 of Pet: Torment

My mind shifts to the way Remus looked at me in that records room. For some reason, he let Ezra believe that he was threatening me for stealing. But he got the truth about the hairpin from me. He even watched me afterward, testing to see if I understood their language. He knows I am important to his siblings, and he knows there is no connection.

I scoff aloud, shaking my head.

“He already suspects.”

Chapter Thirty-Two

Iris

Learning to live with my new reality has been a struggle. It’s been weeks since Remus had his memory wiped, and we are no closer to answers than we were the day it happened. Everyone has accepted Remus’s choice to end Iriel himself and sees it forwhat it is—a warning. Or in my eyes, a blunt reveal of how little control any of us have.

No one has questioned any decisions Remus has made. Even Ezra has accepted the decision without rebuttal. Everyone is content to let things settle the way they are, all because they are afraid of what it could mean if they push back. I see now why, in the past, Remus was so intrigued when I did. It wasn’t just because he hadn’t seen it in humanity. It was because no one who surrounds himeverpushes back.

I was so naive back then. I shudder to think of the times Remus smiled and laughed as I argued and fought against him. It was amusement in its purest form, which is chilling to think about now that he has returned to a version of himself that would splinter my bones without hesitation.

I am a refugee. I have no home here or on Earth. And though Xion has taken me in, her patience is nothing like her brother’s. It’s beginning to take a toll on both of us as her control of the situation slips away. Not that she ever had any. Xion has always been an intimidating being. But now I see where that intimidation extends to. Remus was in control of everything, making me think of his words to me the night he revealed the truth about the bond.

“I do wish you had remained in the bubble of the false reality I allowed you.”

It seems to be his signature trait, allowing everyone to believe they are in control. It is only when that control is ripped away suddenly that we realize how controlled we were. I can’t help but wonder if it’s a trait he somehow inherited from his mother.

She has yet to return or show a sign of her existence since stripping Remus of his memories. I don’t know if I should feel relieved or anxious about it. I have a feeling she’s gone because she’s trying to tie up any loose ends that arose after Remus and I bonded. With each passing day, the twist in my gut grows deeperas I fear the moment she shows up again. When that happens, Remus won’t be here to protect me.

“So, youcanread.” I look up from the book I was reading to see Xion standing over me. The book is a light history of the Leviathan society that Ezra gave to me after the incident with Remus. I’m sure he thought it was just something I was interested in; otherwise, he would never have handed over to me the possibility of finding a way to lock his mother away. But like the books in the records rooms, this one has nothing about it.

“Remus taught me,” I say, closing the book.

Xion scoffs, shaking her head. In the past, I would have taken the gesture as a dig toward me because she doesn’t like me. But after having my arm fractured by Remus for reading, I understand her amusement. It is a crazy thing that Remus taught me their language amidst taking over my planet.

“I can’t imagine what got into him to teach you our language,” she says, sitting across from me.

I bite back my smile as I recall my tactic to get him to teach me. But my amusement is short-lived as I am quickly reminded of why I was learning in the first place—all the humans who were counting on me, including Jude. I shift my attention to Xion, studying her closely for once. I can see that day vividly, when she and Remus destroyed the resistance.

I pull in a deep breath, pushing the memory from my mind as I rub the top of the book gently, enjoying the feel of the foreign texture beneath my fingertips.

“I get what you mean,” I say. “He had changed a lot, huh?” I ask, desperate to change the subject.

Xion watches me with an eerie gaze, her eyes mimicking her brother’s. She is still wary of me. She and Remus are the same in that regard. She doesn’t allow people to see past her hard exterior.

“Yes. He never once mentioned you, then one day suddenly he’s bonded,” she says.

“Hm,” I say.

I can see that she is trying to find some form of comfort as she speaks to me. I may have lost Remus, but our emotions were just beginning to bloom. She’s lost a piece of her brother and is aware of the manipulations her mother used to get it. She’s probably, at this point, questioning everything about her existence.

“If only he hadn’t bonded with me. All of this could have been avoided,” I say.

Xion doesn’t respond immediately, but then she leans forward, allowing her face to give off what she’s feeling. Confusion slowly appears on her features as she studies me.

“Whydidhe bond with you? It was stressed so heavily that we do not bond with a species weaker than us. Remus knew this. Why would he disobey her?” she asks.

Now it’s my turn to laugh. “I couldn’t tell you. It was an accident. I pushed him too far, and he made sure I could never attempt something like that again,” I say honestly.

Xion remains confused as she studies me so I explain further.

“He decided that day that he refused to live without me. Whether it was because of an accident or my short life span compared to yours,” I say.

Her expression softens.