Page 112 of Pet: Torment

We lie in silence, both of us aware of the uncertain future that awaits us. But no matter what comes of it this time, we’ll face ittogether. So we enjoy that, at this moment, nothing and no one is willing to come between us.

For this moment, at least, we finally have peace.

Chapter Forty-Nine

Remus

My mother was very calculating in the ways she taught me and Xion. She taught us enough that we would always be at the top of the food chain, but never enough that we could overpower her. She taught us to master the conversion of energy that surrounded us, but nothing of the world we came from. Shetaught us unknowingly to suppress our power so that no one could ever find us, but never taught us how to find her. She taught us how to travel to her plane of existence, but never how to create our own. She spent centuries doing this, hiding us from our true world. A world that I apparently was born to rule.

The room is quiet as Iris sleeps peacefully.

It’s become a new obsession of mine: watching her sleep. It calms me to know that she is here, safe, and breathing. I know that something in me has changed, but at least around Iris, I feel like myself again, even if she doesn’t see it. I don’t feel as lost. I realize now that the “changes” she saw in me when we first returned toXyranniswere my mother’s block weakening and the effects of maturing as aCelestivineslipping through.

I shift my attention to the hairpin I gave her. It’s still resting in her hair. It has become a part of her the same way the necklace she inherited from her parents has, and that makes me happy. She may be reluctant to admit it, but I am important to her in some way.

And that is all that matters to me.

I pull myself away from her bedside, making my way out of my room to the rest of the ship. She obviously wasn’t aware of the loss of life that occurred during our time apart, my siblings keeping it from her, no doubt. I plan to keep it that way if it will ease her mind that much more. I can’t imagine what it would do to her already fragile mental state to know something so traumatic occurred.

Unfortunately, the aftermath of Kuron’s arrival has left us all weak and divided. Xion, though relieved to hear about Ezra, was devastated to find out about her companion. She hasn’t spoken in days and refuses to eat. Ezra still has yet to awaken. He was only offered the medical attention that could save him if I agreed to return with Kuron. And I, having awakened a new part of myself thanks to Kuron, can feel whatever once existed of meslipping away. I don’t know who I am anymore, now that it has been revealed that so much of my life was a lie. That, on top of all the lies and betrayals among us, has left me with no one I trust anymore.

No one, except for Iris.

My footsteps falter as I pass the glass window that revealsXyrannis. My disgust for it still boils. I never liked it. I was only manipulated into thinking I did. The only pleasant memories once again come from Iris. Had she not asked, it would have been rock and debris in the middle of another dead star system.

“Can’t say I’m disappointed to see you’ve changed your mind.” Kuron approaches from the opposite end of the hall. He’s always near when I am walking around, and I know it’s because he’s watching me. He has given me even more access to my power as aCelestivine. It won’t be long before I surpass him once I have more training and understanding. I am to take over for him someday, after all.

I don’t respond as he comes to stand next to me. I don’t know that I can ever return to this world to even justify sparing it. It’s as if every moment of my past meant nothing. It was all for nothing. Every war, every battle, every addition to this “empire” was all for nothing. The entirety of my life lived under my mother was a dark shroud that never should have been. It was a coercion against my will, and I feel nothing for it but resentment.

I push the emotions out of my mind as they become overwhelming.

“This doesn’t mean I am going back on my word. As long as you keep yours to help my brother recover,” I say. “And that Me’Rite faces consequences for what she has done.”

Kuron nods. “Of course she will. What she has done is—”

“Despicable, I know,” I say, turning to face Kuron. “But if she is ever let within five feet of any of us, Ezra included, I will kill her.”

Kuron watches me carefully but doesn’t respond. I mean what I say. My mother and I never had a relationship before this. Before, there was a mutual respect between us. But that has been doused, and I feel nothing for her other than hatred. If I could, I would kill her.

After a moment, Kuron turns to faceXyrannisbefore speaking.

“Why did you spare it? If you hold this much animosity for her, why spare the planet she chose over you? When I sent you down there, you were so certain of your decision, but you suddenly changed your mind. Why?” he asks.

“It means something to others who are close to me,” I say.

Kuron laughs.

“You continue to surprise me.” He places his hand on my shoulder, looking me in the eyes. “I look forward to getting to know you better, Remus.”

He walks away, leaving me alone once again, and as I look in the glass, I notice my reflection. My eyes now mimic his and my mother’s, a testament of the newfound power swirling around in me. It’s so consuming. I’m confident it is the reason my father was willing to track me down across the cosmos to bring me back. Whatever power is swirling around inside of me is enough that he would rather find it than start over.

“Me, too,” I murmur.

I take a deep breath, wanting nothing more than to crawl into bed with Iris and pretend nothing has changed. I want to go back to the moments we shared the day I left. Everything at those moments was perfect. The future held promise. Now, it only holds uncertainty. And with a new path forced into my life, I’ve been given no choice but to walk it. At least this time, I will have one person by my side as I do so. One person I can trust, always.

My siblings have lost that honor. My anger towards them has been weakened by the events that have passed since, but itdoesn’t change the lies and secrets told. I couldn’t imagine being in Xion’s shoes, especially since I was only a few hours prior. And once Ezra awakens, his life will also feel like it has imploded within itself. He has no idea the horrible things our mother has done, including takinghisfather’s life. It makes me weary of the place we are returning to. What about it was so terrible that my mother fled, taking us with her? We are divided and weak, heading to a place we know nothing about, with no other choice.

I quietly move away from the glass, going back to the room Iris is in. When I am apart from her, and I think of all the things that have transpired, I feel myself moving into a dark place that consumes me. It’s a place that, without her and the memories she brings, I would settle into for the rest of my life.