Page 58 of Only You

Detroit

Old Man Eddie’s bar was different during the day. It didn’t carry the undercurrent of all the impromptu parties it hosted or the drunken secrets it kept. It was bright and open, the most fitting place for Demir to be.

He had been lucky that it was poetry night when he stumbled up into the place the night he quit boxing.

He was also lucky that Haze was weirdly loyal to people he had only known for a short time, which the man chalked up to being biracial with a lot of siblings.

Either way, Demir was grateful that for once he wasn’t running to a fight.

He wondered if his aunt would be proud of him or would accuse him of doing the same thing he always did.

Wiping down tables in preparation for opening in a few hours, he heard someone whistle behind him.

‘How’s it going?’ Haze approached, an easy smile stretched across his face.

Demir shrugged. ‘It is what it is.’ He straightened and gave the man his attention. ‘I thought I wouldn’t see you till tonight.’

‘I figured you would dip out before then.’

‘I was going to work a few hours before heading your way. Eddie offered extra money plus tips if I stayed a while,’ he explained.

Haze hummed before sitting in a nearby chair. ‘Well, I figured I should stop by and check on you. Jack just called me about trying to find you. Sounds like he has cash waiting for you. And before you ask, I didn’t say nothing. I’m a messenger, not a snitch.’

‘I don’t want it,’ Demir answered gruffly. ‘I’m tired of fighting.’

‘I don’t blame you. Tough taking hits like that. The old man might call me soft for saying so, but I’m not one for bloody noses. Too pretty, you know?’ Haze smirked as Demir rolled his eyes.

‘I wouldn’t recommend it,’ he said, returning to the counter to soak the towel. ‘It’s like you’re a bird trapped in a cage they keep forcing to sing. All the while, you’re left wondering how they don’t understand that they’re war cries.’

‘That sounds like poetry to me,’ Haze pointed out. Yet again. Demir held back a sigh.

‘Come on, D. You know you have something to say,’ Haze pressed.

Demir stayed silent even though he agreed. He knew a lot of truths, harsh ones that could make the world feel hopeless. But was that the truth he wanted to tell the world? No.

If he was going to say anything, it would be how running never solved anything, but it was the only thing he knew. How sweet memories were crueller than reality, that hope killed more than men. It tortured and killed dreams, too.

‘He’s not wrong.’

A chill went down Demir’s spine as the sound of heels echoed through the bar.

And it was like a trance fell over him as Selene walked over, looking just as sultry and mysterious as she had when they first met.

Except this time, he could point out the smallest trace of stiffness in her gait as she approached Haze.

‘Hi, honey,’ she greeted sweetly.

Haze stood and kissed her on the cheek. ‘Looking lovely as ever, Ms Selene,’ he complimented.

She smiled, tossing her hair over her shoulder before giggling. Every movement was scripted, right down to the way she squeezed Haze’s arm. ‘You’re not so bad yourself,’ she winked, glancing at Demir for a moment before turning her gaze back to Haze. ‘Looking for another artist, I see.’

‘What can I say?’ He held his hands up and shrugged before clasping Demir on the shoulder. ‘I’m a patron of the arts. And I’m telling you right now, this one right here is better than any of those washed-up Ivy League brats. Bet he could knock out Shakespeare without using one fist.’

‘I wouldn’t be surprised.’ Her tone was soft, genuine.

Demir ignored it, talking to Haze instead. ‘I’m sure some racist piece of shit is rolling in his grave right now,’ he said dryly, earning a bout of laughter from Haze.

‘Eh, fuck them. They never had taste anyway.’

He snapped the towel at the man. ‘Get outta here, Haze. I’m trying to work.’

He raised his hands in surrender, grinning as he made his way to the door. ‘All I’m saying is it can’t hurt to try.’

Shaking his head, Demir started wiping down the tables again.

‘Well, hello to you, too.’ Selene sat down in Haze’s former seat. ‘I’ve been looking for you.’

‘Can’t say the same.’

‘I’m sure.’ She smiled blandly before looking around. ‘Nice gig you got.’

‘I’m not fighting again.’

‘Because of me?’

‘Because I’m tired of getting knocked out and cleaning up your bullshit after,’ he snapped, staring her down.

She scowled, pushing her hair behind her ears. ‘But you still go to the gym. Late at night. Benny told me he ran into you the other day.’

Demir almost sighed. He should’ve known Benny would tell her that, probably even told her that he had stayed there until dawn.

Some days, the only way he could sleep was punching out the hurt.

Not that it helped much; five minutes in front of Selene, and he felt just as raw as that day in his apartment. ‘It’s an itch. It’ll go away.’

Selene stared at him for a moment before opening up her purse, and he narrowed his eyes as she pulled out an envelope, placing it on the table.

He picked it up carefully, looking inside. It was a stack of bills. ‘What is this?’

‘The money from the last fight that Jack keeps telling everyone he has for you,’ she said. ‘Figured you didn’t want to talk to him either so I’m getting rid of his excuse.’

‘Won’t he ask about this?’ He lifted up the envelope.

Selene laughed, but it sounded bitter. ‘Don’t worry about that part. I’ll handle it.’

He sighed tiredly. ‘Selene, why are you here? What do you want?’

‘I wanted to make sure we were done.’ She looked up, sadness slipping from beneath her flirtatious facade. ‘And now we are.’ She stood up, her hips swaying invitingly as she walked away, leaving Demir feeling cold.

If this was going to be the last time he talked to her, he refused to talk to the character.

Fists clenched around the money, he got up and caught up to her halfway to the door, stepping in front of her. She stopped short and he grabbed her hand, placing the money into it. She struggled to pull out of his grip, but he held on.

‘What are you—’

‘Why didn’t you believe in me?’

Selene stilled as their eyes met, hers full of remorse. She opened her mouth, but nothing came out.

His grip loosened as his heart dropped to his stomach. ‘You should have told me you didn’t.’

‘Of course, I believed in you,’ she said quickly, pulling him back.

‘You’re an amazing fighter. But Jack was lining up wild cards and, after that fight with Johnny, I couldn’t watch you get hurt like that again.

I figured if I arranged easier fights between the official ones, it would help. That’s all.’

‘You should have trusted me to get better.’ ‘It wasn’t you,’ she whispered.

A shadow fell over her face, one he had seen too many times when she didn’t think anyone was watching.

How much longer did she plan on carrying the weight of the world?

With her determination, it could be forever.

For a moment, all he could do was sympathise for the woman in front of him, someone who spent all her time protecting everyone but herself until it was too late.

And he couldn’t save her. All he could do was hope she would do it herself.

‘You can’t fix his mistakes, Sel,’ he told her. ‘And we both know you don’t want to.’

Selene bit her lip, and he had a feeling that the habit came from keeping in all the things she never said.

‘One day, when you do share your words, you’ll be great,’ she told him, but he knew what she really meant.

I won’t be there.

He took back the envelope, running his fingers through her hair as he placed a kiss on her forehead, her hand resting comfortably on his chest, right over his heart.

‘I know,’ he whispered.

Selene didn’t look at him as she slipped out of his arms and Demir didn’t watch her go. Instead, he went back to work, arranging the tables and checking inventory. He didn’t linger on the thought of what could’ve been, choosing to look ahead.

‘I’m telling you this is it,’ Haze said as he scribbled Demir’s name on the setlist. He’d wanted to put Demir last, but the former boxer convinced Haze to put him in the middle. It was his first performance after all; he didn’t think his confidence would last the whole night.

‘Let’s just get this over with,’ he said, feeling the sudden urge to stretch like he did during a fight. He kept flexing his hands, so they didn’t become fists; the last thing he was in the mood for was another pep talk from Haze about rivers and letting things flow.

If life was a river, Demir was a rock.

‘You know what, let’s get a drink to celebrate. You don’t look like you can stay on your feet much longer,’ Haze teased.

He scowled in his direction, but Haze wasn’t looking at him.

Instead, his friend’s gaze was locked on a beauty at the bar.

She wore a lavish, purple dress that was dangerously short under her winter coat, hair pinned in tight curls, her smile wide as she threw her head back in laughter.

She was stunning but Demir didn’t expect much less from Nora.

He followed Haze, staying in his shadow as she greeted him with a flirtatious smile and a kiss on the cheek. Haze smiled at her, his dimples showing, and Nora’s eyes softened.

Oh.

‘I got an old friend here, for ya,’ Haze said, motioning to Demir.

Her eyes widened in surprise as he nodded to her.

It wasn’t their first time seeing each other since their break-up months ago – they saw each other at Mackie’s all the time – but this was the first time they had to say more than a quick hi.

‘Good to see you,’ she said.

‘You, too.’ Demir’s voice was reserved, making Nora purse her lips in displeasure. He waited for Haze to say something, but someone yelled his name from across the room.

‘Ah, fuck,’ Haze said. ‘I’ll be back. Get me an old fashioned, will you?’ Before Demir could respond, Haze was walking away.