Page 49 of Only You

‘…I don’t know what happened to my father,’ she confessed.

‘My sisters and I had heard about the war and all the other shit that’s always happening, but he was a good dad.

He was strict but he never hurt us. Not until he got fired from his job and started drinking more…

it was like a switch. One day, he loved us and the next we were the reason his life was shit.

You and Jack are lucky. You can punch your way through life while I’m stuck. If not with him, then another man.’

Demir said nothing, making her nervous. He didn’t want to be out here and now she was telling her life story. She knew better than that.

It was only when he took her hand that her mind stopped churning.

‘Punching only gets you halfway there,’ Demir told her. ‘Walking away, well, that will take you anywhere you wanna go.’

Selene looked up at him, his skin blue in the pale light of the moon.

It made her think of the river in front of them as the light danced across his striking features, and she wished she had asked more about him.

Over and over, she realised she didn’t know much.

Even worse, she found the desire to know more growing stronger every day.

And the thought of him one day not being in her life…

‘What do I do if someone wants to walk away from me?’

‘Jack won’t do that. He’s just figuring it all out. Give it some time.’

She faced the water, watching the moon’s shimmering reflection. She didn’t want him to see her disappointment at his answer, one she wasn’t even sure about herself. She pulled her hand out of his.

‘Is that what you needed with Nora?’ Selene asked. ‘She seems happier when we go to the club. Or at least hates me less.’

‘Why does she hate you in the first place?’

‘She probably thinks I’m pretentious, just like I think she’s a whore. Not that either of us were wrong,’ she said with a shrug.

‘Sel, come on.’

She put her hands up as if surrendering. ‘I promise, I am not talking bad about her. I’m just saying we’ve had our views of each other from the beginning. We’re not supposed to get along. We understand each other better now and that’s enough. But you haven’t answered my question.’

‘Which is?’

‘Are you and Nora better now?’

Demir was quiet as he thought about her question. From where Selene stood, the answer was obvious. Nora had been smiling more, and Jack was always mentioning Demir going on dates. She swallowed the bitterness that seemed to appear every time she saw the two together.

They’re good together .

Demir was her friend. She needed to be happy that he’d found someone that suited him. And yet…

‘Yeah,’ he finally said. ‘We are. We’re still taking it slow but I’m not ruling it out like before.’

Selene bit her lip, holding back a frown. Slowly, she nodded. ‘Thanks for talking to me that night. I needed it.’

‘It’s the least I could do. You’ve looked out for me since the beginning,’ she said.

‘Wouldn’t be too sure about that,’ he replied. ‘Once upon a time, we hated each other, remember?’

Selene huffed, laughing. ‘How could I forget?’ she said. A sudden wistful smile crossed her face. ‘That’s kind of the ironic thing about our relationship. The first time you helped me, you were actually being an asshole.’

Demir tilted his head in confusion before motioning for her to continue.

‘I can’t thank you enough for taking the money Jack wanted to give me after that first fight. Do you remember?’

Demir nodded.

‘It was the first time someone was on my side for that kind of thing. Maybe you won’t get it as a man because, no matter what, you can own something .

Jack will never see a problem with it, because he’s always taken care of me, but I always feel like I have to prove I own everything I’ve got, which is why I don’t want Jack’s handouts.

He’s already given me too much. I’m not even his wife. ’

Demir’s eyes flickered to her hand, her fingers bare, but they both knew jewellery only amounted to so much.

‘You might as well be,’ he pointed out. ‘Everyone knows you’re his girl, no matter what you do or who you talk to. You might as well have a ring on your finger.’

‘I’m not his wife,’ she snapped, her skin hot from the implication. ‘Don’t matter what anyone has to say about it, that’s the truth. Got that?’

Demir blinked several times, probably shocked by the intensity of her words. She fidgeted under his lingering gaze but didn’t take back what she had said.

Selene could see herself spending the rest of her life with him, but being a wife was different.

It came with responsibilities she didn’t want.

It also meant being tied to someone for better or worse, and she had seen how quickly people could change.

Hell, she changed all the time. Just the thought of Jack becoming a stranger to her in the worst kind of way made the hairs on her neck stand on their ends.

‘Loud and clear,’ he answered. ‘Are you ready to go?’

Selene opened her mouth before closing it, uncertain. She stood instead and walked towards the passenger side.

Demir didn’t comment on the change as he went around. ‘You heard about Mackie booking Parker this weekend?’ he asked once they were in the car.

Selene paused, looking at him in surprise. ‘I… no. He got Charlie Parker?’

‘Nora said they go way back,’ he said. ‘Apparently, the place is going to be packed.’

‘I–I mean of course it is!’ Voice budding with excitement, she squealed. ‘It’s Charlie Parker! I love his record with Dizzy. I can’t believe Mack made that happen! I have to find a new dress!’

‘Of course, that’s the first thing you think off,’ he said dryly.

‘Of course it is,’ she repeated and stuck her tongue out at him. ‘I’m seeing someone important.’

‘And why would he want to see a brat like you?’

‘Don’t call me a brat.’ Scowling, Selene smacked his arm. ‘I’m way smarter than you’ll ever be.’

‘Oh, I know,’ he said, the corner of his lips lifting into a smile. ‘But you’re still a brat.’

‘Nobody asked you,’ she grumbled, anticipation bubbling up inside her as they drove home.

She wiggled in her seat, humming one of her favourite Charlie Parker songs.

At some point, Demir put a hand on her leg to stop her from moving, but she just grabbed it, singing into it like it was a mic.

The song was off key, and, for a moment, he stiffened awkwardly while driving with one hand, but eventually her bad singing made them both laugh the rest of the way home.

It was the most fun Selene had had in a long time, and she was glad it was with him.

The sudden thought made her laughter stop short as they parked behind Jack’s apartment building.

When did that happen?

The change in energy was immediate, and Demir’s smile disappeared. He looked at her curiously, but she shook her head, getting out and waiting for him to exit the car so they could take the back way in.

‘And here we are,’ he announced once they had reached Jack’s door.

Selene dug into her purse for her keys. ‘Thanks for walking me,’ she said politely. She stopped before unlocking it, facing him.

‘Maybe next time…’ She licked her lips nervously before clearing her throat. ‘We shouldn’t talk about Jack or Nora.’

‘Seems like we’ll run out of things to talk about.’ ‘There’s other things.’

He raised an eyebrow before stepping closer. She tensed but didn’t move away, despite having the room.

‘Like what?’ His voice was quiet, and she stared at him, a sudden sense of longing punching her in the gut.

Tongue-tied, she tried to force a smile. ‘Jazz,’ she whispered and turned to unlock the door, slipping inside.

She leaned against the door, heart racing a mile a minute. She felt her cheeks heat up and patted them in an attempt to calm herself. This needed to stop. It was bad enough she had wanted to dance with him at the party weeks ago, but now this?

‘Baby, is that you?’

Selene jumped, turning to look in the living room. Groggy, Jack lay on the couch. He must have fallen asleep there.

‘Hey,’ she said breathlessly. ‘I thought you were at the fight.’

‘It ended early. Guy was a dud,’ he grumbled as he sat up. ‘Called the gym but no one answered. Figured you left so I came home.’

‘Oh, I grabbed some dinner,’ she explained, taking off her shoes. She went over to him and held her hands out. ‘Come on. Let’s get you to bed.’

Slowly, Jack blinked and took her hands. She almost laughed at the sleep lines on his face. He had definitely been dreaming. Wrapping his arm around her shoulder, they walked to the bedroom. He flopped down on the mattress, and she giggled as she pulled off his shoes.

‘Who did you go with,’ he asked sleepily. She froze.

‘Huh?’

‘Dinner,’ he clarified. ‘Who did you go with?’

‘Oh, just Demir. We got sandwiches.’

‘M-hm,’ Jack mumbled and drifted back to sleep.

Selene felt a pang of guilt as she watched him. She had no real reason to lie to him. Yet, it didn’t stop her from standing over the sink, scrubbing off the mud from her shoes.