Page 18 of Only You

Paris

Damien watched the recruit shift nervously, his eyes constantly roaming, giving away where he planned to strike, but the captain didn’t move. He stayed still, large and intimidating, while the recruit decided on his next move. He shifted to the left.

Easy , Damien thought right as the man lunged. He sidestepped the move, knocking him off balance and sending him tumbling. Damien chuckled as he stepped over him.

‘Again,’ he commanded. The recruit, Leo, got up with a huff.

This time he didn’t take as long to decide his next move, but the result was the same.

Meanwhile, Damien assessed his skills. Leo had only been training with the Republican Guard for a few days since transferring from the cavalry.

He was a good soldier but had room for improvement with his hand-to-hand combat.

His stance was too open and he still looked terrified.

Yet, there was a doggedness in him every now and then that reassured Damien.

Even though the moves were sloppy, they were decisive. I can work with that.

So, he told the recruit to try again and again for hours. Every time Leo got up, his legs got shakier. Damien waited patiently, letting the recruit attack first but still outmanoeuvring him easily. Leo groaned and Damien crouched down to pat his shoulder.

‘Not the worst,’ he commented before stepping over him while the crowd of soldiers around them whooped excitedly. They pulled Leo up from the cobblestone streets in front of their favourite tavern.

Usually, they would go a few times a week but with him splitting his time between the estate and the caserns, it had been much longer since he had spent time like this with the other soldiers. Even with the underlying desire to see Sabine as soon as possible, he loved being back home.

One soldier handed Damien a cup of cider and he sat at a table where Roulet watched the rowdy group with the tiniest of smiles.

‘That was quite tame for you,’ he commented. ‘Usually, you rush in there like a Spanish bull.’

‘What can I say?’ Damien shrugged. ‘I’ve adjusted.’

Roulet hummed as Damien downed his drink. ‘Not sure if I should be happy that my prized captain is losing his fire.’

‘Ha!’ Damien shook his head at the general. ‘Never that. I’ve merely found better outlets.’

‘Ah, yes.’ Roulet’s gaze focused on him. ‘You have been coming back less and less.’

‘I’ve found a room close to you,’ Damien reasoned. ‘Sabine prefers I be close with the whispers of unrest, especially given the country’s past.’

‘The nobility has long been done away with.’

Damien held back a scoff. He may be a loyal soldier, but he was no fool. The titles may be gone, but the land and money stayed exactly where they were, in the tight grip of the aristocracy. The up-and-coming bourgeoisie only disguised that to a certain degree.

‘Yet, there’s still turmoil,’ he pointed out politely. ‘Madame Sabine is still fairly new to the country. The lack of her father’s presence still makes her uneasy.’

‘And you find kinship with her?’ Roulet’s gaze was sharp, but Damien looked straight ahead.

‘There’s a way of life we understand. She was raised by a fighter, as was I. Both deemed outsiders. We’re warier than most.’

Roulet sighed. ‘Yes, unfortunately. While I respect my friend, I truly wish he hadn’t involved her so heavily in his business.

She’s still struggling to accept the engagement.

My guess is that she will have trouble settling in as a wife.

’ Roulet leaned towards him. ‘I hope you are doing nothing to interfere with that transition.’

Damien’s throat went dry at the knowing look. Sometimes, he truly hated that Roulet was so insightful.

‘I’ve told you I would not.’

‘She’s a beautiful girl.’

Damien bristled at the comment, his hands tightening into fists. ‘Many are,’ he said, an edge entering his voice. Inches apart, Damien wondered who would reach for a weapon first.

‘Do not touch her,’ Roulet warned. ‘And stay at the casern tonight. That’s an order.’

‘Yes, sir,’ Damien forced out, knowing better than to delay his answer.

The two glare at each other, neither backing down. Roulet dismissed him with a wave. Damien didn’t say anything else as he stood up, soldiers scrambling out of his way. Stepping outside the tavern, he punched the wall, the pain in his chest overshadowing the one in his hand.

He was growing tired of the rules that only allowed him to have part of what he wanted.

It had been that way his whole life, from Roulet forging him to be a soldier as a child to being Sabine’s secret lover.

Roulet had to hide how he viewed Damien as a son.

Sabine had to lie to her family to be able to show him love.

It seemed the only way people could show they cared for him was by giving him only half of what he needed.

He slumped against the wall, closing his eyes.

He hated picturing only impossible things but couldn’t resist the fantasy.

It used to be living with Roulet as his son or being a war hero.

Now, it was living on a farm far away with Sabine.

They would be safe and alone. She would ride horses all day while he worked the land.

Their children would run free. In the evenings, they would sit together and look at the stars, wanting nothing else in the world.

He opened his eyes, and they landed on grey stone, his heart sinking.

Perhaps Roulet was right. He needed to quit now, save both him and Sabine while he could.

That was the smartest strategy, the only real one left.

He looked down at his side, where his sword rested against this hip.

It was a standard issued weapon; one he had quickly replaced when he became captain with a blade he had personally commissioned.

That sword was his most prized possession; he had traded it for Sabine’s bracelet without a second thought.

I love her.

And that bested logic every time. They may have never exchanged the words aloud, but he knew it was the truth.

It was the only reason either of them would risk so much.

Without a doubt, being in love with Sabine was the most reckless thing he had ever done but it was also the only thing that kept him going. And Damien was not one to give up.

Hours later, he entered Sabine’s room again, burying his nose in her hair as she pulled him into her. He could deal with Roulet’s disappointment later. For now, he focused on the one thing that made surviving each day easier.

‘It’s quite amazing when you think about it,’ Pauline, the blonde, blue-eyed daughter of one lawmaker or another, said to Sabine.

She wished she could keep up with all the names, but despite how much time she spent going over them with Madame Roulet, she was still unfamiliar with the Laurent family’s friends.

She hated to admit how overwhelmed swirling crowds of people made her.

She wanted to stop hosting and just sit down.

Unfortunately, Pauline was insistent on conversing with her.

‘I mean, you got the crown jewel of suitors, don’t you think?’ she asked, a jealous glint in her eye.

Sabine smiled. ‘We suit each other well,’ she answered civilly. Sabine started to step around her, but Pauline followed suit, blocking her.

‘Yes, but you were unaware of him before your arrival in Paris, were you not?’ she continued. Sabine hid her hands behind her back, resisting the urge to force the woman out of her way. She had to maintain relations because… she couldn’t remember anymore. Why was she here?

‘How did you know out of all the suitors in the world that he was so “suitable”? Or was it all that land that pulled you two together?’

‘My, my, Pauline, you’re quite concerned about my upcoming marriage,’ Sabine warned with a smile.

Her eyes widened in faux innocence. ‘Forgive me, I only meant to dispel a few rumours. People say you have long been acquainted, but none have ever seen you two together.’

‘There’s no need for theatrics,’ someone said behind her.

Sabine looked over her shoulder to see Lamont with a goblet of water, handing it to her, standing close but not enough to touch her.

‘Sabine is modest, and I respect such grace in a woman.’ Turning to Sabine, Lamont held out his hand.

‘I believe we should make our way over to my father. Shall we?’

Usually, Sabine would hesitate, but tonight she took it without a second thought.

He walked her in the direction of his parents but changed their course right before they reached the circle of people, instead, leading her to a path just outside.

She hadn’t noticed how warm it was inside the house until she took a deep breath of the cool night air.

‘I hope you are not offended by my rescue,’ Lamont said stiffly, letting go of her hand as soon as they were out of sight. Sabine rubbed her fingers together as she checked behind them. Not Damien nor any of the other guards had followed them out.

They were alone for the first time since their disastrous ride.

‘It’s quite all right,’ she said. ‘I’m actually grateful.’

‘I trusted you would appreciate the gesture. I remembered your fatigue when you first arrived,’ he recounted, a small smile curling on his lips.

‘Yes… I thought it was my lack of practice with such festivities.’ Sabine cleared her throat nervously.

‘Perhaps it is my personality. Maybe I should be grateful I didn’t grow up with the expectation of attending these kinds of events.

I shouldn’t have taken that frustration out on you. I apologise.’

‘There’s no need, I understand,’ he said.

‘Pauline mentioned that you are the “crown jewel of suitors”. I must admit I don’t quite know what she means. I know your family used to be part of the aristocracy.’

‘Ah, yes, before the commoners decided we were all better off dead. They were never fond of the lucky ones,’ he joked dryly.

Sabine forced a small laugh. ‘And how are you lucky?’

‘I’m surprised you don’t know,’ he said. ‘My father owns half of the coffee and cocoa plantations in your country – well, the ones owned by the French, thanks to your father. We’re working on expanding soon.’

‘Oh,’ Sabine said, her eyes wide.

‘You truly didn’t know?’

‘My father has been usually busy lately. He probably assumed you would inform me of your family’s endeavours,’ Sabine forced out as she tried to process Lamont’s words.

She knew her father was selling C?te d’Ivoire land to foreigners, but she didn’t know it was for French plantations, which meant he was in deeper with the government than she thought.

‘H–Have you and your father visited often?’

‘Occasionally, but personally I quite enjoy civilisation. Not to say your home isn’t beautiful but I can’t quite see myself spending much time there,’ Lamont said. ‘Considering how adamant your father was about you being here, I assume you two are of the same mind.’

Sabine bit the inside of her cheek to hide her shock as she realised exactly why her father was enamoured with the idea of her marrying Lamont. ‘Yes,’ she lied. ‘We’re quite alike.’

‘Even if not, I doubt your father would give any less than the best in the world,’ Lamont commented. ‘He cares for you deeply.’

‘Yes,’ she said awkwardly before starting down the path towards the stables. Lamont followed her. She tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear.

‘You’re wearing my ring.’

Sabine looked down at her hand to see the emerald ring sitting comfortably on her finger. ‘Today is a special occasion,’ she told him, not meeting his gaze. She had forgotten she was wearing it, instead constantly aware of her ruby bracelet pressing into her skin under the sleeve of her dress.

‘Right,’ he said. ‘You play the fiancée with great skill.’ The dejection in Lamont’s voice caused Sabine to look at him. He kept his eyes straight ahead, but she could see the disappointment.

For the first time it dawned on her that Lamont might have been excited about marrying her, that he may have viewed it as more than a power grab or gaining a bed mate.

Maybe, he wanted a genuine relationship with her.

Yet, considering his family’s business, she couldn’t imagine why.

Sabine looked down at the path, an uncomfortable lump forming in her throat. ‘It is my duty,’ she responded.

‘I know.’ He touched her arm softly, signalling her to stop. ‘I feel I must apologise for my presumptions. I admit I assumed you would be happy to marry me. I didn’t think about what you may have lost in the process. That was cruel of me.’

‘As my fiancé, you have that right.’

Lamont laughed sadly. ‘And look what it has gotten me,’ he replied. He reached out and took her hand. She stiffened as he brought it closer to his lips. She felt his sigh caress her skin as he let go. ‘I’m starting to care for you, Sabine, even if you don’t feel the same.’

Sabine shifted on her feet, unconsciously stepping away from him. The shadows shifted, and from the corner of her eyes, she could make out Damien blending into the wall of the estate. She looked down at her feet to avoid staring.

‘I’ll tell the guests you are tired,’ Lamont said. ‘Perhaps I should fetch Sandra.’

‘I can make my own way,’ she said gently. ‘Good night, Lamont.’

‘Good night, Sabine.’ He reached out to her again but seemed to think better of it, walking back to the party.

She waited for him to move out of sight before retiring for the night. When she entered her bedroom, a pair of arms wrapped around her. She gasped before digging her elbow into the person’s stomach. She heard an ‘oomph’ but the arms tightened, and she heard a familiar chuckle.

‘Your self-defence could use some work, but not bad,’ Damien said, kissing behind her ear. She scoffed before turning around in his arms.

‘Don’t scare me like that,’ she admonished. ‘I thought you were downstairs.’

‘I saw you and Lamont parting in the garden,’ he told her. ‘Are you okay?’

Sabine tried to smile, but it didn’t feel quite right.

‘Perhaps we should begin sword fighting again,’ she said instead. ‘My endurance is dreadful now.’

‘If you need to rest—’

‘No.’ She turned and looped her arms around his neck. ‘Stay with me.’

Damien smiled before taking her hand, sliding her ring from her finger. ‘Don’t worry about this,’ he said. ‘I’ll take care of you.’

They kissed, and for a moment, she could relax and just give in. She let herself be taken apart, pleasure racing against her skin. She lost herself in every kiss and embrace, letting Damien enjoy every part of her and doing the same in return.

After he left for the night, she could no longer ignore the feeling that settled in the pit of her stomach. She stared at the windowsill, where Damien had put her ring. Studying the gem, she bit her lip as she realised what her marriage entailed.

She was trapped.