Page 7

7

ASA

What the fuck just happened?

Only half aware of what I was doing, I slid into my car and slammed the door behind me.

I’d just walked in on Dex doing…something, but what?

The fear on his face and the way he looked like he was about to either faint, or maybe just drop dead, was almost as distracting as the fact that he was naked except for a pair of underwear, with his dick out, and clutching his computer like it was his lifeline.

My first thought was that I’d interrupted some solo time or he was sexting with someone and panicked when he realized his door was open, but that didn’t track.

His laptop screen had been facing me, but instead of seeing a video or even another person on a webcam, the image was a wide-angle shot of his doorway with me standing in it. Even with the camera angled down and everything above my chest cut off, there was no doubt in my mind that the headless figure on his screen was me.

He slammed it shut quickly, but I saw enough to know that he had to have been either recording himself or streaming to someone.

The only other detail I could clearly picture was the bright gold logo in the corner of the screen. I’d seen it before, but I couldn’t remember where or what it was for.

There also seemed to be some sort of chat going on under the video feed, but it didn’t look like any sort of video call app I’d seen.

Was Dex a cammer?

I’d never watched a cam show, or even logged into a cam site, but I’d seen enough ads for them when I was searching videos for my own solo time that I had a general idea of what they looked like.

Still reeling from everything that had just happened, I pulled my phone out of my pocket and opened my web browser.

There was no way Dex was a cammer. That was absurd. But if he wasn’t, then what the fuck had I just walked in on?

I stared at the search bar for a few beats, then typed in “list of sex cam sites by popularity” and hit go.

The yellow logo from his laptop was the second one on the list.

Holy shit. Dex was a cammer.

My perfect, golden child older stepbrother made money jerking off on the internet.

What the actual fuck?

I was just closing out of the internet when a text came through.

Dex : we need to talk

Asa : now?

Dex : yes

Dex : where are you?

Asa : the parking lot

Dex : see you in a few

Pulling in a fortifying breath, I shut down my phone and reluctantly climbed out of my car. As much as I wanted to forget what happened and never mention it ever again, he was right. We needed to talk about it.

Dragging my heels like I was on my way to the principal’s office, I made my way back up to his apartment.

Was he going to kick me out for violating his privacy? I’d only been here for three days. Had I fucked everything up?

Bracing for whatever he was about to unleash on me, I stepped into the apartment.

Dex stood in the hallway a few feet from the door, not looking much better than he had when I walked in on him.

He was dressed, his backward ball cap on his head like usual, but his expression was eerily blank, and his eyes were still filled with panic.

“I’m sorry,” I said as soon as I’d closed the door behind me. “I never should have gone into your room like that. But I heard these weird noises, then you shouted, and there was a crash. I thought you were hurt or there was an emergency, and I just reacted.”

“It’s not your fault.” He pulled his ball cap off and raked his hand through his curls. “I would have done the same thing in your position.”

Silence descended on us. What was I supposed to say? How did one ask their stepbrother if they cammed as a side hustle?

“So, you’re probably wondering about…a few things.” He slid his ball cap back on, not looking any more relaxed than he had before.

“I might have some questions,” I hedged.

“What you saw…that’s my…I—” He blew out a breath. “I cam.”

I nodded, not exactly shocked by the news after my sleuthing. “Okay.”

“That’s it?” he asked incredulously. “That’s all you have to say?”

“What do you want me to say?”

“I don’t know, something.”

“Like what?”

“You’re not going to give your opinion?” He shot me a flat look. “It’s not like you to keep those to yourself.”

“There’s not really anything for me to have an opinion on.” I shrugged. “I get needing a side hustle in this economy.”

“A side hustle like camming?” He crossed his arms over his chest, his biceps popping in a way that should come with a warning label. “You really don’t have anything to say about me doing sex work?”

“Do you have any idea how many girls I’ve met who have Only Fans accounts?” I asked. “And my coworker’s brother used to do porn and still sells content as a side gig. I’m not about to clutch my pearls over you being a cammer. You do you.” I cracked a smile. “Literally.”

He let out a strangled laugh that sounded more like a stress response than an actual laugh.

“I thought you were going to try and blackmail me or something.”

“Good to know you think so highly of me,” I said dryly. “You’re doing me a solid by letting me stay here. You really think I’d be a dick and blackmail you when you’re the only thing keeping my ass off the street?”

“And if you weren’t staying with me?” he asked pointedly. “Would you be as chill then?”

“Yes.”

“Yes?” He blinked like a confused owl.

“Yeah. Sex work is work. And honestly, if I looked like you, I’d one hundred percent be doing the same thing.”

Something I couldn’t read flashed in his expression, but it was gone a moment later.

“Does anyone else know about this?”

He shook his head.

“I won’t say a word. I swear.”

“I believe you.” He shook his head. “This is so not how I saw this conversation going in my head.”

I shrugged again. “I can clutch my pearls about other stuff if that will make you feel better.”

He snort-laughed. “Thanks, but I think I’m good.”

“I really didn’t mean to barge in on you like that,” I repeated. I hated the little part of me that needed him to know the truth, that needed to make sure he wasn’t mad at me.

“And I didn’t mean to flail like that.” He cracked a small smile. “Live and learn, right?”

“Right.”

“How long have you been doing it?” I asked, needing to break the silence that stretched between us.

“About three months.”

“Do you do it often? Like, do you have a schedule or something so I know when to not be around?”

“I try to get online on Wednesday and Saturday nights. Sometimes I’ll do a Monday show, but Wednesday and Saturday are my regular nights.”

“What time do you go online?”

It was ten, and he’d obviously still been in the middle of things. I could find places to hide out on Saturday nights with no problem, but keeping myself occupied on Wednesdays could be tricky if he was on late.

“I start at nine and usually log off around eleven. Sometimes I finish early, but I try not to go later if I can help it.”

My mind whirred with a crush of thoughts. What the hell was I supposed to do until eleven on Wednesday nights?

“You really don’t care?” he asked, his expression scrutinizing.

“Nope.” I glanced at the door to his room. “Do you need to…finish?”

He huffed out a laugh and shook his head. “I doubt I could after that excitement.”

I rocked on my feet and tried to push the mental image of Dex jerking off at his desk out of my head.

“I need to take a shower,” I said, more to break the silence and distract myself than because I actually needed a shower. I’d already taken one before I’d gone out, but he didn’t know that because he hadn’t been home at the time. “Do you need to go first, or…”

“You go ahead,” he said quickly. “I have to clean up the mess I made.” His eyes widened comically. “Water! I knocked a glass of water over. That’s why I flailed like that. Because I spilled water…and made a mess.”

I smirked.

He shot me a flat look. “Shut up.”

“I didn’t say anything.”

“You didn’t have to.” He pointed to his own face. “This was saying plenty.”

“If you say so.”

He glared at me, but there was no real heat behind it. “You’re annoying.”

“I am?”

Dex rolled his eyes, but his posture was relaxed, and he was acting like his usual self again. At least that awkwardness was over.

“I’m going to…” I pointed at the bathroom door.

“Right!” He stuck his hands in his sweatpants pockets but pulled them out a second later and crossed them over his chest. “Enjoy.”

I couldn’t stop my grin. “I’ll try.”

I’d never seen Dex so flustered and out of sorts before, and I was enjoying it way too much.

We stood there for a few more beats, then Dex turned on his heel and hurried into his room.

Letting out a soft chuckle, I headed to the den so I could grab a change of clothes.

Of all the things that could have happened tonight, walking in on my stepbrother while he was in the middle of a cam show would have been at the bottom of my list of guesses.

Now I just needed to get my stupid brain to stop picturing him naked before I forgot why I’d spent the past four years avoiding him.

“This is a bad idea,” I muttered, staring at my phone as indecision warred inside me.

I was currently sitting in my car in the back parking lot at work. It was ten minutes after nine, and it was Wednesday.

Things had been awkward the first few days after I’d discovered Dex’s secret. He’d been jumpy as hell, and I’d spent the time trying not to picture him naked every time I looked at him.

Things were better yesterday and today but had gotten awkward again as I left to give him the apartment so he could work.

Now I was sitting in my car and contemplating if I should try and find his cam room.

I knew I shouldn’t. It was a huge violation, and he’d probably kick my ass onto the street if he found out, but my curiosity was killing me.

Even with my overly active imagination, I couldn’t picture Dex camming. I could clearly imagine him jerking off, but my brain sort of stalled when I tried to think of him interacting with his audience and doing the non-naked part of the job.

I should put my phone in my pocket and find a coffee shop or something that was open late and forget all about Dex and his camming. I’d brought my computer with me so I could write, but my head wasn’t in creative mode right now.

“Fuck it.” I opened my web browser. I’d see if I could find his room, check out his show, then leave before he got naked. That way I could satisfy my curiosity without risking my living situation.

I navigated to the site and was greeted by a wall of thumbnails filled with people in various stages of undress and doing all the things one would expect to see on a cam site.

Most of the thumbnails were of women, and a few were straight couples. I scanned the page and saw a bunch of tabs near a search bar. I tapped on “male” and the page refreshed.

I scanned the new thumbnails, looking for Dex. Each still photo had a counter at the bottom, and it looked like the photos were arranged with the highest number on top and getting gradually lower as you went down the list.

Were those viewer numbers? Were they organized by popularity?

There was also a counter that told me how many pages of cams there were to look through. On the main page, the highest number had been seventy-eight. On the male page, the highest number was six.

I’d assumed there would be fewer male cammers than female, but that was a huge difference. Unless that had been all active cams on the first page?

Whatever, it didn’t really matter how many pages there were. I was taking it as a sign from the universe that I shouldn’t be doing this if I didn’t find him on the first two pages.

The second to last thumbnail caught my attention, and I zeroed in on it. Holy shit, that was Dex.

I went to tap on his photo but paused, my finger hovering over the screen.

Should I do this? I still had time to put my phone away and find a coffee shop.

Ignoring my trepidation, I tapped on his photo. My screen refreshed, and there was a smiling Dex, looking happy and relaxed in his desk chair.

One nice thing about this site was that I didn’t need an account to see rooms, so Dex would have no idea I’d logged in and watched his show.

It was a bit disorienting trying to read the comments as they flew by. Part of that was because my phone screen was small, but also because they moved fast.

“Yeah, that was quite the adventure,” Dex chuckled and rocked side to side in his chair, looking relaxed and carefree and way too good in a tight white tee and a pair of gray sweatpants. “I think I’ve waited long enough for my regulars to show up. Now we can talk about what happened on Saturday.”

Saturday, the night I’d walked in on him.

“So I’m sure it was pretty obvious that I was interrupted during my last show.” His cheeks flushed a soft pink.

Was Dex blushing? Had I ever seen him blush before? If I had, I couldn’t remember when.

“It was my fault.” He pulled off his hat and smoothed his hand through his curls. “I didn’t know he was coming home early, and I didn’t close my door properly. I heard him, panicked, flailed like a moron, and almost wrecked my laptop, then had to face him in nothing but my jock with my dick out.” He laughed, but it sounded a bit strained.

Wait, those green underwear were a jockstrap? Those and backward ball caps were my kryptonite. Of course Dex would look like a sex god in them.

Shoving that thought and mental picture out of my head, I focused on the screen again.

The comments moved by so quickly I gave up on trying to read them. I didn’t really care what his audience said anyway.

“Yeah, that was my roommate.” He huffed out a little laugh as the chat went nuts. This time I saw the word stepbrother over and over.

“Yup, my roommate, who’s also my stepbrother.” He leaned back in his chair, a lazy grin on his too-handsome face. “That’s right. He’s the same stepbrother I fucked.”

I choked on nothing.

He’d told his cam room about us? What had he said?

“It was years ago. Things aren’t like that between us,” he said, bringing my thoughts back to his show.

I wasn’t sure how I felt about his cam room knowing we’d fucked. On the one hand, they were all faceless strangers on the internet, so it didn’t really matter if they knew or not. But it still felt weird that a bunch of randoms knew my biggest secret.

“Yeah, he wasn’t expecting to get an eyeful of me either.” Dex grimaced. “I’m not sure which of us was more freaked out. Probably me, honestly, but that’s the first time I’ve ever seen him go into panic mode like that.” He chuckled. “I remember this one time when we were teenagers and home alone, the smoke detector went off. We both came running out of our rooms, and there was smoke in the hallway. I freaked out. Like, legit froze, then hit the deck and started army crawling down the hall like a moron. He just put his shirt over his mouth and nose and raced downstairs like he was in an action movie.” He paused, his eyes moving like he was reading the chat.

“No, I didn’t keep crawling like a dumbass. I got up and followed him downstairs, only by the time I found him, he was standing there with a fire extinguisher in one hand and an apple in the other. The bastard put out the fire and had time to grab a snack before I’d even gotten my ass downstairs.”

He paused to read the chat again. “It was a candle fire. One of our parents left it lit before they’d gone out and didn’t tell us. It wasn’t too bad, just some drapes and a bit of the wall burned.” Another pause. “What did he do when I finally got there? He handed me the fire extinguisher, took a bite of his apple, and said, ‘Be a doll and take care of this for me,’ then went right back to his room like nothing happened.”

My chest tightened as I listened to him tell the story. We’d only known each other for a few months at that point.

I’d assumed he either forgot about it or thought it was no big deal. The way he’d told the story sounded like he was impressed, almost like it was a fond memory for him.

But that was probably just cam talk. He was just playing things up for his audience.

“Yeah, he obviously knows I do this now.” Dex pursed his lips, his eyes fixed on the chat.

I dropped my gaze and saw more than a few comments asking if we’d ever cam together.

“Yeah, that’s not going to happen.” He shook his head, his eyes still on the chat. “He’d probably kick me in the nuts if I asked. We don’t get along.”

More comments flowed through the chat. I could only catch about half of them, but they were all asking about me and begging him to ask me to cam with him.

“He’s gay, I’m bi,” Dex said, obviously answering a question I hadn’t seen. “Yes, he’s hot.”

My heart did a weird skittering beat, and my jaw actually dropped.

Dex thought I was hot? Or was this more cam talk? I knew he didn’t find me hideous since he’d managed to get hard and fuck me four years ago, but we’d been eighteen and nineteen at the time. From what I’d heard, it didn’t take much to get most guys going at that age.

“What does he look like? He’s blond, has blue eyes, and is kinda goth. But not like emo goth, more that he likes to wear black and wears makeup and nail polish and has a bunch of piercings.” Another pause. “Yeah, very different from me. But it works for him.”

He paused again, obviously reading something off the screen.

“I have no idea how much it would take to get him to cam with me, Biglife. But something tells me it would be a lot.” He smirked, but I could tell he was trying to cover up his true emotions on the subject. “And like I said, things aren’t like that between us. Not anymore. That night was… Let’s just say I’m sure he’d rather poke his eyes out with a hot spoon than let me touch him like that again.” His cheeks went pink, and the soft glow only made him look hotter. “Would I fuck him again? If I didn’t have to worry about him cutting my dick off with a rusty knife, then yeah. I’d fuck him again.”

My brain did a weird thing where it kind of screeched to a stop, like the mental equivalent of a record scratch.

Dex wanted to fuck again? Or at least he would if he thought I was down for it?

I’d assumed he’d rather walk barefoot on LEGO than touch me like that again. Was this real, or was he just saying that because that’s what his audience wanted to hear?

He had a tip counter in the bottom corner of the screen, and it had been steadily creeping higher the more he said. I knew people had a thing for stepsiblings, and I had no idea how much each token or whatever they tipped with was worth, but he was getting a ton of them the more he talked about me.

“Yeah, I still think about it,” Dex said, his casual tone bringing my attention back to the show. “Want to know a secret?” He shot the camera a lazy grin that did things to my insides. “You know what to do if you want to hear it.”

The tip counter jumped considerably, and my eye was drawn to Dex’s crotch and the noticeable bulge there. He thanked a bunch of the users who’d tipped, but I barely heard their names as I waited for him to tell his secret.

“He’s not just the first guy I fucked,” Dex said, leaning closer to the camera and dropping his voice like he was sharing state secrets with his audience. “He’s the only guy I’ve had sex with.”

I nearly dropped my phone.

The hell? That couldn’t be true, could it?

My super-hot, superstar athlete stepbrother hadn’t fucked a guy in four years?

“I’ve done other stuff with guys, but he’s the only one I’ve had sex with.” He shrugged. “I was in a situation for a while where I had to hide my sexuality. Discreet hookups were about all I could risk for years, but I also didn’t meet anyone I wanted more than a BJ or a handie with, so it wasn’t like I was suffering. And I’m bi, so I still had sex, just not with men.”

His words echoed in my mind. I was in a situation for a while where I had to hide my sexuality .

Dex had gone to a Catholic college. I’d never thought about how that might affect his ability to be out, even with the school having a policy of inclusion and acceptance of LGBT students. Was that why he’d had to hide that he was bi?

Dex chuckled as he read something. “You guys really want us to cam together. But since that’s not happening, how about we get things started?”

More comments flowed through the chat as Dex tapped on his keyboard a few times. Some green text reading “take off shirt” popped up, and a new counter appeared in the bottom corner of his image that looked like a countdown instead of a counter like before.

“I don’t think I’ll be talking about our first time tonight,” Dex said with a chuckle. “I’m still not over how I was talking about him on Saturday and he came home and caught me with my dick out. I’m half convinced I somehow summoned him by talking about him so much.”

Half in a daze, I exited his room and went to a search engine to look up what the tokens people tipped him with were worth and how much he got to take home.

Once I found the info, I did some mental math to convert the tokens to dollars, then took off the site’s cut.

Jesus H. Christ.

Just to be sure I hadn’t made a mistake, I opened the calculator on my phone to double-check my numbers.

Nope. I was right. Dex had made almost eighty bucks just from sitting there and talking to his audience fully clothed, and it looked like he had certain thresholds he needed to hit before he’d even get naked and start jerking off.

Was that typical for him? Or was today an anomaly? And if he’d made that much in the first twenty minutes just talking, how much did he clear at the end of his shows?

A part of me wanted to tune back into his show so I could see how it worked and how much he made, but I was self-aware enough to realize that was a terrible idea. I’d already spent the past few days fighting my attraction to him and picturing him naked every time I looked at him. Actually seeing him on cam would only make it harder to get over whatever the fuck was going on with me.

Was any of what he’d said true? Did he really think I was hot? Was I really the only guy he’d fucked? Did he still think about that night? Did he really want to do it again?

Blowing out a breath, I leaned back in my seat and stared out into the darkness, my mind spinning with everything I’d just learned.

But even with all the truth bombs he’d dropped, the one that I couldn’t shake, the one that was louder than all the others, was that he thought I was hot.

No one had ever called me that, and after so many years of being ragged on for being different, I’d assumed no one ever would.

Had he meant it?

And why did I care if he did or not?

I should never have tuned in to his show. It wasn’t like I could ask him about anything he’d said, and now I was just going to drive myself crazy thinking about it when it was probably just cam talk.

Why did I give a flying fuck what he thought of me when I didn’t give a shit about anyone else’s opinion?

That night four years ago had been a mistake, and I’d assumed I was the only one who still thought about it. But if what he said tonight was true, then we shared another secret. I might be the only guy he’d slept with, but he was also the only one I’d slept with too.