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DEX

Silence greeted me as I entered my dad and stepmother’s house for my little sister’s birthday party. Pausing in the doorway, I pulled off my hoodie and hung it up in the coat closet.

I’d lived in this house for four years before I’d left for college, but it had never felt like home, and a strange feeling of unease filled me as I closed the door behind me.

The party wasn’t starting for another half hour, and the main floor was quiet as I made my way to the kitchen at the back of the house.

“What do you mean you didn’t pick up tape?” Miranda, my stepmother, asked as I approached the kitchen, her voice shrill and way too dramatic for someone talking about tape.

“You didn’t tell me to pick any up,” a familiar voice said flatly.

My heart rate picked up slightly as I came into the kitchen to find Miranda glaring at Asa, who held Ruby on one hip and looked completely unbothered by his mother’s anger.

Chloe and Tanner, my eight-year-old half sister and six-year-old half brother, were sitting at the kitchen island coloring, and Dad was at the table with a glass of wine in his hand and reading something on his tablet.

“Dex!” Ruby screeched when she saw me, letting go of Asa and waving at me with both hands with so much enthusiasm she wobbled precariously in his arms.

Every head in the room swung toward me as Asa steadied her before she could fall and gently placed her on the ground.

“Hi, Dex!” she shrieked at the same time Chloe and Tanner did. Their little voices were so filled with joy I couldn’t help smiling, some of my earlier trepidation leaving me.

My siblings were one of the main reasons I’d moved home, and I’d missed them while I’d been away.

“Hi,” I said stupidly as Ruby rushed toward me and Chloe and Tanner abandoned their art and sprang out of their chairs.

Ruby grabbed me around the knees and hugged me tight, grinning up at me with her cherubic face and nearly white-blond hair that was scarily reminiscent of Asa.

Chloe and Tanner had taken after Miranda and my dad and had dark hair and eyes, while Ruby was the spitting image of Asa with her pale hair and dark blue eyes. Genetics were funny that way.

Gently, I untangled her from my knees and got down on her level so I could give her a proper hug. “Happy birthday, princess.”

Before she could answer, Chloe and Tanner crashed into me, causing me to sway on my feet.

It took a bit of shifting, but I managed to wrap my arms around all three kids and give them a big hug without toppling over.

“Dex,” Miranda greeted with a bright smile, all traces of her earlier anger gone.

“Hi,” I greeted her, then flicked my gaze to the table.

Dad gave me a quick once-over, then nodded in approval and went back to his tablet.

I’d chosen my clothes carefully and put on a blue polo and a pair of crisp khakis. I was used to his inspections and had learned long ago that it was easier to just dress up instead of pushing back and wearing what I wanted when I was around them.

“You’re here early,” Miranda commented.

“I thought I could help set up. Or keep these monsters out of your hair before everyone gets here,” I said, ruffling Tanner’s hair, which looked like it hadn’t been brushed yet with how wild it was.

“That’s so thoughtful of you,” Miranda said, shooting Asa another glare. “At least one of you knows how to be helpful.”

I glanced at Asa before I could stop myself.

He looked the same as he had a year ago—and every year since he’d turned eighteen and grown out of his awkward teenage phase.

His platinum blond hair was still in the same shaggy cut he’d had for years, and his lean frame was draped in baggy black clothes that had been his signature look since we’d met eight years ago.

He wasn’t wearing the chunky chain jewelry he used to favor, and his eye makeup was more subtle than before, which only emphasized his big blue eyes and angular features, giving him an ethereal, almost elven look.

He’d taken out most of his facial piercings, leaving only his ears and septum ring in, but usually wore a stud right under the center of his bottom lip and a barbell or ring through his left eyebrow. He also had his tongue pierced.

My body tightened, and I silently cursed my dick as it twitched in my briefs.

I’d figured out I was bi years ago, and even though Asa was the furthest thing from my type, my treacherous body still reacted to him every time I saw him.

Asa met my gaze, his expression stony and his eyes blank. Another thing that hadn’t changed since we’d met eight years ago. At least his attitude made it easy to ignore my inconvenient attraction to him. And it reminded me that what happened between us had been a colossal mistake.

The kids all started talking at the same time, their words blending together into an excited din and knocking me from my thoughts. Tanner poked me in the thigh with his small finger, and Chloe grabbed my pant leg, holding tight like she was afraid I might be swept away.

Chuckling at their antics, I shifted my attention from Asa and glanced down at them. Ruby immediately put her arms up and made grabby hands at me, silently asking for uppies.

I scooped her up and settled her on my hip. My heart melted a bit as she rested her head on my shoulder and wrapped her thin arms around my neck, snuggling into me.

I’d worried it would take time for the kids to get used to me again after being gone for so long. Chloe had only been three when I left for college, and Tanner had just turned one. I’d only seen Ruby a handful of times since she’d been born, and not at all in the past year.

Those fears had thankfully been unfounded, and it had only taken a few hours for them to warm up to me the first time I’d come over after moving home.

There was honestly no better feeling than seeing their excitement and elation every time I saw them, and I was grateful for the chance to get to know them better and be there for them as they grew up.

Unlike most people in my life, their happiness came from a place of love. There were no strings or ulterior motives attached to their smiles and affection. They loved me because I was their big brother, and they didn’t give a damn about my accomplishments or the other things that were usually a prerequisite for people giving a crap about me.

“I want to show Dex my room,” Tanner announced, giving up his poking and grabbing my hand.

Tanner was six, but he was small for his age, and his hand looked tiny in mine.

“He’s already seen your room,” Chloe said, shooting her brother an exasperated look.

She might only be eighteen months older than him, but she had more sass than most adults I knew, and I loved that for her.

“He hasn’t seen my rocket sheets,” Tanner countered, tossing her a triumphant look.

“How about you take the kids upstairs until everyone starts arriving?” Miranda suggested. “That’ll give me a chance to finish getting everything set up down here.”

“Yeah, sure.” I avoided looking at Asa and instead turned my attention to my little siblings. “How about I check out Tanner’s sheets, then maybe we can get you guys ready and into your party clothes?”

Something told me that Ruby’s bright pink pajamas and the mismatched sweatpants and t-shirts Tanner and Chloe were sporting weren’t the outfits Miranda wanted them to wear for the party.

“Can you fix my braids?” Chloe asked, pushing a hank of hair that had come loose from one of the twin French braids that fell over her shoulders. The braids had obviously been done yesterday, and a mess of flyaways and locks of hair had come loose from the weave, making her look a bit like she’d put her hand on one of those electricity balls that made people’s hair stand on end.

Ruby’s hair was loose around her face, but the mess of tangles in it told me that it hadn’t been brushed since she woke up.

“I’m not quite at French braiding yet,” I said apologetically. “I can do regular braids, but I’m still learning how to do the fancy ones.”

“Asa can show you,” she said with a bright grin. “He does the best braids. Nails too.” She held up one hand to show off the soft pink polish on her nails.

Ruby nodded her agreement against my shoulder.

“Who cares about braids and nails.” Tanner dug his heels into the floor and tugged on my arm hard enough his whole body bent at an angle. “I have rocket sheets,” he reminded me like that was the most important thing in the world.

“Right,” I let him pull me toward the kitchen door. “Let’s go check those out, then we’ll get our party clothes on and Asa can fix your braids,” I said to the kids.

I was almost out of the kitchen when I heard Miranda light into Asa again, belittling him for forgetting to pick up tape and making her already busy day even more difficult.

He didn’t say a word, not even when she called him stupid and blamed him for the kids not being ready yet.

Wordlessly, I followed my siblings to the stairs, her voice fading away the further from the kitchen I got.

Miranda had always been harsh on Asa, way harder on him than she’d ever been with me or the other kids, but had it always been this bad?

Asa was annoying as fuck, and he seemed to delight in pissing people off and making them lose their shit, but he wasn’t the type to fight or even argue with people. He preferred a more passive-aggressive approach and tended to just let people berate him, even when he wasn’t in the wrong.

I’d heard her lecture him hundreds of times over the years for things even dumber than not picking up tape, but for some reason, I didn’t like that she was talking to him like that today. And it bothered me that he was just standing there and taking it.

Shrugging off those thoughts, I focused on the kids who were still vying for my attention and followed them upstairs.

Asa wasn’t my problem, and his mother being pissed at him had nothing to do with me. He was a big boy and could take care of himself.

Besides, it wasn’t like he hadn’t been delighted every time our parents lit into me while I still lived at home. He didn’t give a shit about me, and I didn’t give two fucks about him.

That was the way it had always been and how it would always be. I just needed to get used to him being around again and everything would go back to normal.

The party was finally winding down, and I was beyond ready for it to be over. I’d spent the last few hours surrounded by people I barely knew and didn’t really care about, answering their questions and telling the same stories over and over again.

I was proud of my time at Notre Dame and damn proud that I’d managed to get a double major while on a football scholarship, but that didn’t mean I wanted to spend my sister’s birthday party talking about my time in college and rehashing my plans for the future over and over again.

I’d much rather hang out with my siblings and the other kids, but every time I’d tried to slip away to get a break from the constant attention, someone would sideline me, and I’d get roped into another conversation with people I barely knew.

“Dex,” Miranda said, coming up to the small group I was currently in the center of, a suspiciously bright smile on her face and a petite blonde girl on her heels.

She’d always treated me way better than she treated Asa, but I hated how fake she was. How every smile or kind word felt like a manipulation, and how she had no problem throwing fits in order to get what she wanted.

Her “my way or the highway” attitude was one of the reasons I’d been so eager to go to school out of state, and I really hated how my dad just sat back and let her say or do whatever she wanted.

He hadn’t always been like this, and his jokes of “happy wife, happy life” and “what’s mine is hers and what’s hers is hers” covered up that he enabled her behavior and even seemed to find it attractive.

That was only one of the many differences in him since my dad decided to have an affair with Miranda that broke up both Asa’s and my families.

My parents hadn’t exactly been happy before the affair, but that didn’t give my dad a pass to stick his dick in his new paralegal. Or for him to knock her up and leave my mom for his sidepiece.

I tolerated Miranda to keep the peace with my dad, and because I didn’t want to risk her keeping my siblings from me or convincing my dad to cut me off more than she already had.

“Do you remember Cecily?” Miranda asked, nudging the girl closer to me. “Jefferson’s daughter,” she added when I didn’t say anything.

“Oh, right. Of course.” I gave Cecily a tight smile. “How have you been?”

Jefferson was one of the lawyers at my dad’s firm and one of his golf buddies. I hadn’t seen him in years and hadn’t seen his wife or daughters since I was in high school.

“I’m good, thanks.” She smiled at me, her expression a strange mix of shy and seductive that didn’t have the effect she was probably going for. “How are you doing?”

“Good.” I forced a smile. “Settling in and all that.”

“Cecily goes to Rutherford,” Miranda cut in. “And she was kind enough to volunteer to show you around campus and give you the ins and outs before you start your program in the fall.”

Rutherford College was a small but prestigious university about an hour from town. I’d been accepted into the DPT, or Doctor of Physiotherapy program, for the fall term, which was the other reason I’d moved home after being away for almost five years.

My hackles instantly went up. Miranda knew I’d spent a ton of time on campus since most of my high school friends had gone there. This felt like another one of her manipulations.

“What are you studying?” I asked Cecily, more to be polite than because I actually cared.

“I’m still undecided.” She twirled a lock of hair around her finger and batted her eyelashes at me.

Undecided? How old was she?

It was hard to place her age just by looking at her. Her outfit and makeup made her look like she was older than me, but if she was still undecided in her major, that meant she was probably a freshman.

“Are you an undergrad?” I asked, shooting Miranda a look.

I’d been dealing with this matchmaking crap since I was seventeen. I’d told both her and my father that I wasn’t interested in dating anyone, but that didn’t stop her from constantly trying to set me up with their friends’ daughters.

Cecily nodded, flipping her hair back with a flirty smile. “I’m just finishing up my first year.”

First year? That would make her eighteen, which was way too fucking young for me. I might only be twenty-three, but I had a hard time relating to anyone more than a few years younger than me and wasn’t interested in barely legal hookups.

“Are you excited to start your program?” she asked, leaning over slightly to give me a better view of her cleavage.

“I am,” I said, my tone as flat as my mood.

“You must be so proud,” one of the people in our little circle said to Miranda. They’d told me their name, but I’d forgotten it after meeting so many people today.

“We are.” Miranda shot me a syrupy-sweet smile that was as fake as a seven-leaf clover. “It’s every parent's dream to have a doctor in the family.”

I bit my inner cheek so I didn’t remind her I was getting a doctorate degree, not an MD or even a PhD. I wasn’t comfortable with people calling me Doctor, especially since I hadn’t even started my program yet.

“You never know, you might have more than one,” another woman I’d met today said. “You still have three little ones.”

Miranda laughed. “That’s true. Here’s hoping Dex’s influence rubs off on them, and I don’t end up with three more Asas.”

Everyone, including Cecily, laughed with her.

I couldn’t even muster a smile. I was so ready for today to be over.

“It must be so annoying having him as your stepbrother,” Cecily said, leaning in like we were sleepover buddies sharing secrets.

I glanced over at the couch where Asa was reading to a group of kids. He was holding up a picture book and using his finger to show them the words as he read them. Ruby was perched on his lap, her head on his shoulder, and the rest of the kids were gathered around him and utterly enthralled with his storytelling.

I didn’t like the way my stomach tightened at the sight, and I turned my attention back to Cecily.

What the fuck was going on with me today?

“He’s so weird,” she continued. “Someone needs to tell him that 2001 called and wants its fashions back.” She snickered and gave her hair a flirty toss.

I ground my teeth together so I didn’t say something in his defense.

Asa was weird, but that was one of the few things I actually admired about him. He didn’t give a fuck what people thought of him, and he was unapologetically himself, even when people demanded that he conform.

I went along with what people wanted and always had. Some days I wished I wasn’t so agreeable all the time, but it was easier than pushing back or causing waves like Asa constantly did.

“Would you excuse me?” I said suddenly. “I need to go see to something.”

I was done with this conversation and needed to escape before my facade cracked and I said what I was really thinking.

Before anyone could protest, I slipped away from the group and made a beeline for the back of the house. Thankfully, no one was in the powder room off the kitchen, and I hurried inside, locking the door behind me.

This was exactly why I hadn’t wanted to come today. I hated being paraded around like some sort of trophy for Miranda and my dad to show off like a prized pig at the county fair and act like they had anything to do with my accomplishments.

Pulling in a deep breath, I leaned my hands against the counter and closed my eyes. I just had to make it through the next thirty minutes or so, then everyone else would leave and I could finally spend some time with my siblings.

I had no idea how long I spent in the bathroom, just breathing deeply and waiting for the unease inside me to fade away. When I felt more like myself again, I glanced at my sports watch.

What the hell? According to the time, I’d been in here for over twenty minutes and the party was over.

As much as I wanted to keep hiding, I couldn’t spend the rest of the night in the back powder room without getting an earful later.

Heaving a sigh, I unlocked the bathroom door and strode into the hall, not really paying attention to my surroundings.

I was just turning into the kitchen when I crashed into something warm and solid.

“Fuck!”

I stumbled to a stop at the impact as the person I’d run into tumbled backward and landed on the floor with a soft thud .

“Ow,” Asa muttered, his face twisted up like he was in pain.

“Asa?” I asked stupidly.

He glared at me and slowly climbed to his feet, wincing as he straightened up.

“Are you okay?” I gave him a quick once-over out of habit. He seemed to be favoring his left side, but I couldn’t tell if he was hurt or if the impact had just jarred him.

“Fine,” he grumbled, still glaring at me.

“What are you doing back here?”

“Mom sent me to look for you.” His glare melted into a sardonic smile. “Your fan club doesn’t want to leave before saying goodbye to their supreme leader.”

All the goodwill and concern I’d felt for him disappeared in an instant. This was the Asa I was used to, combative and full of childish insults.

“Jealous?”

The corner of his mouth curled up in a smirk. “Why would I be jealous?”

“Because…” Now it was my turn to glare at him. I couldn’t say anything without sounding like an egotistical asshole. “You’re annoying.”

“And you need to watch where you’re going.” He rubbed his back, his eyes tightening slightly.

Was he hurt?

Asa wasn’t a small guy by most standards, but next to me, he looked downright scrawny. He was only an inch shorter than me, but I had at least thirty pounds of muscle on him. Running into me would be like running into a wall for him.

“Maybe you would have been able to see me if you hadn’t painted your eyes shut,” I said, a weird flare of anger hitting at my concern for him.

It wasn’t my fault he’d run into me. It wasn’t like I wasn’t a big enough target to avoid.

“Really? That’s all you got?” He arched one eyebrow at me. “A crack about my eye makeup? I thought you were supposed to be the smart one. You did go to Notre Dame, after all.”

“Are you done being a dick?” I clenched my fists and tried to calm my anger. Only Asa could make the name of my college sound like an insult.

“How am I being a dick?” His voice was calm and sweet and only served to piss me off more. “I was just pointing out a fact.”

“Move,” I said, not bothering to answer him.

Asa had an annoying habit of twisting my words, and arguing with him always left me in a fouler mood than him. I’d had a shitty enough day already; I didn’t need to add verbally sparring with my asshole stepbrother to make it worse.

He stepped to the side, clearing a path for me to slip past him.

As I did, our arms brushed, and the scent of peppermint and citrus invaded my senses.

I had no idea if Asa wore cologne or aftershave or if that was just his deodorant, but he’d been wearing that combination of scents since I met him.

Flashes of memories hit out of nowhere. Warm skin, soft whimpers, and low moans. An eager mouth and a strong, solid body.

Quickening my steps, I forced those memories back where they belonged and hurried into the kitchen. As much as I wanted to hang around and spend more time with my siblings, I needed to get the fuck away from Asa until my damn body remembered that we hated him as much as he hated me.