Page 12 of Lust & Lies

AIDEN

I STOOD OUTSIDE THE guest room with my palm pressed against the door, wishing I was on the other side of it...with her. My cock throbbed, a constant, punishing reminder of everything I couldn’t have. Not yet.

Fuck!

I wanted that woman so damn badly. Closing my eyes, I forced a slow breath through my nose, trying to bury the need clawing at me. She wasn’t ready. Not yet. Maybe not ever if her memory returned before I could make her fall in love with me again.

Her memory!

That was the biggest threat in the room. I hated how much I feared it coming back. Not just because it could ruin us before we had a chance to start again, but because it could hurt her. She deserved better than to relive the worst parts of our past, of her past.

Sighing, I stepped away from the door, even though every part of me screamed to go back inside, to pin her to that bed, bury my face between her thighs, and worship her the way she deserved to be worshipped.

But I wouldn’t. Couldn’t.

I forced myself down the hall and into the kitchen. A plate and bowl we’d used were shattered across the floor, as if this were a crime scene. That mess was on me. I’d lost control and damn near fucked her right there on the counter.

Only she could pull that type of response out of me. Grabbing the broom, I swept every jagged piece into a pile. The last thing I needed was for her to come in here barefoot and step on glass.

I made sure to get everything, even the fine pieces that were barely noticeable. I swept the pile of glass and food onto the dustpan and dumped it in the trash. Then I wet a few sheets of paper towels and wiped up the food stains.

My cock pulsed as I worked, begging me to drop everything and go back to her. I ignored it. No pain. No gain. Once the floor was spotless, I stashed the broom and dustpan, grabbed my keys, and stepped outside to get our luggage.

Walking with a hard-on wasn’t the most comfortable thing in the world. I could only blame myself for that. I shouldn’t have let it go that far. I knew better. I knew what the plan was. I thought I could handle being close to her without touching her. I was wrong.

In my defense, I’d only planned to kiss her. One kiss. That was it. My first mistake was thinking one kiss would be enough. My second mistake was challenging her. Her competitive ass could never resist a dare.

The second she touched me there... fuck! All my good intentions went up in smoke. Still, no matter how much we wanted each other physically, we couldn’t go there. She needed time. So did I.

Guilt threaded through me as I thought about why I needed time. My reason was much different than her reason. Dr. Mercer told me that with her condition, if the memories didn’t return in three to six months, they likely would never return in full.

The fact that she’d remembered something today had scared the hell out of me. Thankfully, it was only a memory of Ethan, not of me. There were certain memories of me that I hoped she’d never remember.

We’d been through those dark times once. Neither of us could survive going through them again. I opened the trunk, grabbed our bags, and hauled them back inside. There wasn't much. Not enough to get us through the few months I planned for us to stay here.

I’d have to order some stuff for both of us tomorrow. Maybe I’d bring the laptop into the living room so we could recline on the couch together while she chose the things she needed and wanted.

Smiling at that thought, I took the luggage up to the main room and set mine in my closet and hers inside hers. I turned to stare around the bedroom. Our bedroom. A room I wouldn’t sleep in unless she asked me to.

I desperately hoped she’d ask me to. Even though I should say no if she did, I wouldn’t. Couldn’t. I wasn’t strong enough for that, despite knowing that sleeping next to her would make keeping up my pretense as the perfect gentleman hard as hell.

I was already struggling. I didn’t know how much longer I could keep my hands off her. Needing space to clear my head, I headed to my office, hoping burying myself in work would stop me from obsessing over how badly I wanted her.

Storming into my office, I slammed the door shut. Since the guest room was on the other side of the house, she couldn’t hear or see me having a breakdown. I settled at my desk, flipped open my laptop, and turned the device on.

My fingers hovered over the keyboard, but I didn’t type anything. I just stared at the screen and the blinking cursor. There were plenty of emails for me to respond to, calls I needed to return, documents to sign. I didn’t do any of that shit.

Instead, I reached for the security pad beside my laptop. I knew I should put it down. I knew I didn’t have any good intentions. That didn’t stop me from turning it on and swiping through the icons until I landed on Small Guest Room #1.

I clicked the three buttons at the corner of the icon so a drop-down box could appear. I resisted selecting live feed and clicked audio instead. I just wanted to listen in to find out whether my petty ass wife was doing what she’d said she would do or not.

Was she pleasuring herself? I turned the volume up to listen. Silence stretched. I smiled. She wasn’t doing it. She was still just as sexually frustrated as I was. I started to turn the audio off, but I heard something that wiped the grin from my face.

The softest moan filled the air. I turned the volume up more so I could hear her better. She was breathing harder now, faster. My cock pulsed when she released a ragged little gasp that coiled around me, damn near pulling me out of my seat and dragging me back to her.

She was really doing it. She was touching herself. She couldn’t remember her middle name, but she could remember how to finger herself. Why the fuck was I getting angry? Frustrated, I leaned back in my seat and ran my hand through my hair.

Her moans taunted me, teased me, challenged me. I glared at the guest room icon. I shouldn’t do it. I should put it away and answer those emails I needed to work on. But fuck it, I wasn’t the gentleman I pretended to be.

My fingers trembled as I hit the live feed button. The screen flickered, then there she was, sprawled out on the bed, naked. She was fucking naked! I’d never seen a more beautiful sight in my life.

She was lying on the bed, looking like temptation itself, soft light spilling through the blinds, striping across her beautiful brown skin. Her eyes were closed, feet planted on the bed with her thighs spread wide, looking like she was ready to be devoured.

Every inch of her was a fucking masterpiece. My gaze drank her in, taking in her full breasts, taut stomach, slender waist, and toned thighs. She looked edible and untouchable at the same time.

One hand cupped her breast, thumb flicking over her nipple, while the other was between her legs, massaging her clit. I watched her throw her head back, hips lifting as she gyrated against her fingers.

Desire shot through me like a lightning strike and I almost came in my damn pants, right there at my desk. She was giving herself what I couldn’t give her. She wasn’t waiting around for me to take care of her. Never had. She’d always been the take-charge type of person.

Except for when it came to...

I shoved that thought aside. I didn’t want to think about that. She didn’t remember that, and I didn’t want to remember it either. I tore my eyes away from the screen, but the image of her fingering herself was burned into my mind.

I dropped my head into my hands, torn between guilt, craving, and fear that the past would come knocking soon. I needed to exit the guest room cam. I shouldn’t be spying on her during her private moment.

“Aiden,” she moaned softly, the sound pulling my gaze back to the screen.

“Baby,” I whispered.

“Oh, Aiden....”

She was moaning my name while she pleasured herself. Fuck!

“Yes, Aiden,” she moaned, moving her fingers faster. “Just like that.”

Shit. I couldn’t take it any longer. My fingers fumbled with my button in an attempt to undo my pants.

How the hell had she undone this button so easily?

My eyes remained glued to her while I freed my cock and leaned back in my seat. Wrapping my hand around my thick length, I watched her buck against her hand.

Damn it, baby, you look so sexy doing that.

My pulse pounded, heat rolling through me as she cupped her breast tightly. I squeezed my cock, precum leaking from the tip. Trailing my thumb over it, I used it as lube and began stroking myself, matching her pace.

She whimpered, head falling back, lips parting as she gasped, “Aiden...”

I bucked against my palm, my entire body jerking. Her hand continued moving between her legs, faster now, thumb circling her clit. With her other hand, she played with her breast, fingertips twisting her nipple as her breaths came fast, uneven.

“Aiden...” she whispered, a low, desperate plea.

And I wanted to answer. Heaven knows I wanted to answer. Her hips lifted, pussy sliding against her fingers. I leaned forward, hand stroking in time with hers. My cock throbbed, my grip slick with precum.

“Oh...Aiden... just like that...”

“Fuck, baby,” I groaned, fisting my cock tighter as the wet sounds of my hand working my length blended with her moans that were drifting through the speaker.

Her body jolted from the pleasure, eyes squeezing shut, chest heaving. She was close, so damn close. I wanted to come with her. I stroked faster as her body jerked again, her back arching off the bed.

Her hips were moving in time with her fingers now, and it was the sexiest shit I’d ever seen. I desperately wanted her to move like that on my face. I wanted that pussy against my tongue.

I wanted her juices to rain down on me. I wanted to drown in that pussy. I wanted to sleep with my face pressed against it, so when I woke up, it would be the first thing I breathed in, the first thing I tasted. Fuck, I needed this woman.

“Aiden!” she cried out, body convulsing as her orgasm crashed over her.

“Damn it, baby,” I growled when my own bliss slammed into me, hitting me hard and unexpectedly.

White-hot pleasure shot through me. Muscles tensing, I came, hard, hot, thick spurts coating my hand, splattering across my lap, and streaking the surface of the desk. Some of it landed on the security pad, dripping down the side.

I continued stroking, unable to stop until every last drop had been wrung from me. Sated, but wanting more, wanting the real thing, I slouched back, still gripping my cock. My ragged breathing blended with her soft exhales as we struggled to catch our breath.

She lay there, spent, her sweet juices coating her fingers, looking beautiful as hell. And I stayed frozen in place, heart pounding, staring at the screen with cum dripping between my legs. My wife stared at the ceiling, her breath slowly returning to normal.

Then she did something unexpected. She brought her finger to her mouth and tasted her juices. Jealousy surged through me as I watched her sexy ass lick her fingers clean. This woman would be the fucking death of me.

Then she hopped off the bed, smiling like she’d just won the fucking lottery and headed into the guest bathroom, closing the door. How had her masturbation left her smiling while mine left me more frustrated than I’d been before I jerked off?

I stared down at the mess I’d made. Cum every damn where! I was sure this wouldn’t be the last time I was forced to jack off to take the edge off.

“Fuck!” I muttered. “How am I supposed to survive living with this woman and not fucking her until she can’t walk?”

The only thing holding me back was her memories because if they returned, she’d hate me. I needed to find a way to make sure her memories stayed lost in the recesses of her mind. That was the only way we could truly be together and be happy.

That was the only way I could win her heart and keep it. It was also the only way I could protect her from her past and the demons that awaited her there.