Page 107 of Lust & Lies

Those words would’ve brought a smile to my face just yesterday. Today, they confused and angered me. He opened his arms to me.

“Wrap your arms around me, beautiful. I’ll take you upstairs and get you ready for your bath.”

My body didn’t move, but my mind sprinted in circles, questioning everything. Was this love? Was this kindness? Or was it the bait in the trap he’d set for me? The dream still clung to me, refusing to allow me to ignore the things Past-Me had said.

However, no matter how I felt right now, I was still pretty much at the mercy of this man. Therefore, I couldn’t reveal that I’d remembered some of our darker moments. Not yet. Slowly, hesitantly, I lifted my arms and wrapped them around his neck.

He slipped one arm beneath my knees, the other around my back, and lifted me, something he’d done so many times before.Though I didn’t resist, I couldn’t get my body to relax in his embrace. My mind and heart were too unsettled for that.

However, I did stare up at him while he carried me through the house, eyes scanning his chiseled jawline, the relaxed curve of his mouth, the peaceful look in his gaze. He was just a man carrying the love of his life to the bathroom.

That’s what this looked like. That’s the story he wanted to portray. And it was a beautiful story. One I’d fallen in love with. But what if it wasn’t real? Or what if it didn’t have a happy ending?

This could be just another performance in a long line of practiced gestures by Aiden Park. I’m sure he’d done this before. It was probably how he’d made me fall in love with him in the past. He’d made me think I was safe, only to later rip the rug out from beneath me.

God. What kind of man was I married to?

“Since our bathroom doesn’t have a tub,” he started. “I’ll have you bathe in the guest room. Okay?”

I nodded. We reached the bedroom, and he didn’t stop walking. He carried me straight through it, into the bathroom, and set me down in front of the tub. I saw the loofah and the body wash already on the edge of it.

A lavender-scented candle was burning on the corner of the tub, its scent filling the room. I looked away from it, refusing to be swayed by this princess treatment. His fingers moved to the hem of my shirt, eyes meeting mine like he was asking for permission to undress me.

I didn’t give it.

But I didn’t stop him either.

And maybe that was permission enough. He peeled the fabric over my head slowly, carefully, then worked on the waistband of my bottoms. As he slid those down, his knuckles brushed my hips.

My body responded automatically, goosebumps rising along my arms and legs. I hated that reaction. Hated that he still had this effect on me. Hated that I didn’t have the strength to tell him to stop.

“Step out of those flip-flops for me,” he whispered.

I hated myself for doing what he asked. He kept going, removing the rest of my clothes in silence. I’d been naked in front of him before. But this time, it didn’t feel intimate; it only made me feel exposed, stripped bare in every sense of the word.

He knelt beside the tub, tested the water with his fingers, then said, “It’s still hot enough for you. Put your toe in to check.”

Lifting my leg, I dipped my toe in the water, pussy all in his face. I didn’t bother to look and see if he was staring down there. This pussy was off limits toMr. Park. The water felt perfect.

I stepped in and slowly sat down, letting the heat wrap around my legs, my hips, then my chest. I couldn’t hold in my sigh as my muscles started relaxing. How did this bastard always know exactly what I needed?

I sank all the way down until the water kissed my shoulders. I closed my eyes for a brief second, just long enough to imagine myself disappearing beneath the surface and floating away. Not in a self-harm type of way. I’d harm him before I harmed myself.

But more of an escape from my current state. I wished I could disappear to a place where I could be alone to clear my head while I healed and waited for my memories to return. Being with Aiden while I healed wasn’t entirely beneficial to me.

“Here you go, love.”

Opening my eyes, I looked over and saw him still kneeling next to the tub, but now holding out a loofah.

“I’ve got another video call to handle, but I’ll lay out your clothes for you on the bed. When I’m done, I’ll join you in bed. We can sleep in the guest room tonight if you’d like. Or, you can return to our room, and I’ll find you there. It’s up to you.”

I reached for the loofah, fingers brushing his in the exchange. That soft contact made me want to reach for him. It made me want to tell him to stay with me. To join me in the tub. To not leave me alone.

Fuck!I couldn’t help it. My heart still belonged to him despite the turmoil it was experiencing because of him. Though I was immersed in hot water, a chill crept over me when he moved away.

He started picking up my clothes from the floor and carried them to the hamper. As I watched him, moments from the past few days replayed in my mind. Moments like this one, where he took care of me, spoiling me in a way that made me melt for him.

I thought of all those sweet kisses on the forehead, the meals he’d prepared, and every husky laugh he gifted me. I thought of how silly he’d been lately, how happy he’d been. I used to think he was romantic. Thoughtful. Attentive.