Page 27

Tenzin

“ T his one?” I held up a straw Cowboy hat from the massive rack in front of me. “Or this one?” I held up a white one that I’d been carrying around the store we’d stopped at, on our way to the airport.

“This one.” Cooter held up a brown one with a heart pattern woven into it and a little silver heart on it.

“Hmmm. It would go with the boots she already has.”

Cooter grinned at me. “You miss her.”

“Yes. I didn’t expect to miss her this much. Not that I haven’t had fun with you.” We’d been fishing for salmon.

“Well, how can I compare with Babybug?” Cooter laughed. “I should get her a present. Not here. I’ll make her one.” He toyed with the necklace he had around his neck–a penis bone from a raccoon on a leather cord that he wore for luck.

I wasn’t sure what Gwen would make of that.

It had been a great few days. I was so much freer and lighter with the house being settled, Morgan and Jacen behind me, and knowing there was a little firecracker waiting for me in New York.

Not to mention the fishing had been terrific.

“Are you going to date her?” Cooter asked, as I paid for the hat.

“I don’t think she’s ready.” I took the bag, and we got into our rental, which was filled with fishing poles and gear. “I’m not ready. While I adore her, what is the point of starting something if next year she could go literally anywhere?”

Cooter got into the driver’s seat. “Um, because it would be better to be with her for a year than not at all? Not to mention long-distance relationships exist. Also, isn’t she the Knights’ EBUG? Doesn’t that mean she gets a shot next year?”

“I don’t think it works like that. I’m not sure who else is looking at her,” I replied as we drove off.

“Mexico City, even if they think she’s too short. The Hawai’i Tsunamis, who were scouting someone else during that playoff game where her team won the championship–that game where during the sixth round of overtime they dropped the second fucking puck. Though they just brought on a new goalie. The Rockland Daredevils have been keeping an eye on her since she played junior hockey. Oh, and the Quebec étoiles. I’m not sure what the story is there,” Cooter replied as we drove to the airport.

“How do you even know this?” They were all pretty decent teams.

“I asked. Might be some others, but contrary to popular belief I don’t know everyone. If she goes to the Tsunamis, we’re spending off-seasons with her there. Heard the boar hunting is insane , not to mention it’s a fucking island. Fishing should be great.” He turned the music up a little.

They were all so far. Why couldn’t she go to Jersey? We could live together if she played for Jersey. We could make Philly or Boston work too and just commute on the ultra-bullet.

But Hawai’i? Mexico City? Rockland? We could make Quebec work. They were at least in the same conference.

“I don’t even know if she wants a relationship. Or me?” I shrugged.

Cooter snorted. “Babybug likes you. You just need to heal her tender little heart some more. Also, don’t not try just ‘cause you’re afraid.”

“If I have her, I’ll want to keep her. The last thing I’d ever want is to prevent her from having the career she deserves though. She’s only twenty-two,” I blurted, my cheeks warming, as a sad boy country song came on the radio.

“You have it so fucking bad,” Cooter chuckled. “You’re only twenty-seven. Promise me if she wants a relationship, you don’t throw it all away ‘cause she might end up on some other team. You’re overthinking this.”

“True.” I sighed. “There’s a lot to like about her. What if I mess it up? I’m having such a good time being friends.”

He chuckled again. “Then be friends. Dance with her. Feed her muffins. I have a feeling Gwen knows exactly what she wants.”

It was late as I dragged my things down the hallway. Fatigue from the flight pressed down on me. Also, I had a lot of shit–all my fishing poles and gear, which had been at Cooter’s place in Portland, a couple of suitcases, a cooler full of frozen salmon, and her hat.

As I unlocked my door, the one across from me opened.

“Hey there, Big Guy. So you do live across from Clark.” Gwen stood there in a pair of blue satiny pants with stars on them and a tank-top with a matching star.

I opened the door, then turned around, keeping it ajar with my foot.

“Firecracker.” I couldn’t help but grin. “Did you just get off work?”

“Yep.” She grinned. While she’d been working tonight, it hadn’t been that really late shift she often had. That shift always worried me.

“Come over in fifteen minutes?” My belly fluttered a little. Her new hairstyle suited her.

“Sounds good. Do you have everything?” She eyed all my stuff.

“I’ve got it.” I pushed everything inside the door and it closed behind me.

Quickly, I started a load of clothes in the washer off the kitchen. The poles and gear went into the corner of the living room. I dragged my suitcases into the bedroom, then I tossed the fish in my empty freezer, and put the cooler in the sink.

Then I jumped into the shower. The doorbell rang as I got out. Shit. I slid on some shorts, toweled off my hair, and grabbed the bag with the hat in it, dropping it on the coffee table as I opened the door.

“Sorry,” I told her.

“I could’ve given you longer,” she laughed.

“Come in. I was going to make some tea.” My heart beat like a nervous teenager as I ushered her in.

“I’d love that. Tens, you’re ripped.” She joined me in the kitchen and looked me up and down, appreciatively.

Looking down, I realized I wasn’t wearing a shirt. “Occupational hazard.”

Gwen laughed again. How I’d missed that laugh. I started the kettle, then got out two mugs and a wooden box full of tea.

“Pick one.” I handed it to her.

She looked a little different, and it wasn’t only the hair. There was something about her that looked more relaxed. Happier. Not to mention some of the thinness had disappeared from her face. Some of the shadows had disappeared from her eyes as well.

An elaborate spine tattoo peaked out from her tank-top. She had a ladybug tattoo on one ankle and a hockey stick on the other.

I had a tattoo of two fish on my bicep, Cooter had a matching one. Also, I had a yeti face on my shoulder that I’d gotten as a rookie and had been drunk as fuck.

“Clark isn’t going to miss you, is he? He’s back?” I tried to bite back the jealousy. Was he the cause of all these changes?

“He flew back home yesterday, but he’ll return in a few weeks. I can’t wait for you two to meet. He’s letting me stay in his guest room. Which is such a relief. My housing situation got messed up, but it’s fine now.” She bit her lower lip.

“I’m glad to hear that.” I took the tea bag she picked and added it to a mug. Guest room. That must be the two-bedroom side of the building.

“What about when classes start? Are you moving into the dorms?” I asked. “I have a truck, so I can help you move.”

She shook her head. “Housing is full. I could join the waitlist, but Clark says I can stay as long as I want. Knowing you live across the hall makes that very attractive.”

I poured the tea. We sat down on the couch and she caught me up on her week, telling me about Squire camp, shopping, her university practices restarting, and so much more.

It made me realize a few things. Gwen had been keeping a lot from me–and rightfully so. We didn’t know each other well yet. She’d been struggling to figure out how to pay tuition and worried about where she’d live.

“Things are good now.” Gwen smiled. “I never would have thought the Knights–and the Maimers–would come through for me like that.”

“How could they not? You’re one of them. What do you still need?” I asked, glad she had the big things figured out.

“Eventually, a new backpack and some stuff for my classes. I have a few more weeks. But enough about me. I want to hear about fishing.” She finished her tea.

I told her all about our trip, showing her pictures. “I’ve got a freezer full of salmon now. One night this week I’ll make you dinner?”

“I’d like that. Can we go dancing again? I missed that.” She gave me one of her shy smiles.

“Absolutely. Before I forget, I got you a present.” I gave her the bag.

“Tens. You got me a hat.” Gwen put it on her head, smiling bright as the sun. “I love it.”

The sight of her in those pajamas, that showed the outlines of her nipples, her bare feet, and the hat made my groin tighten. She looked kissable. Lickable. Fuckable.

Yeah, I’d missed her so fucking much when I’d been gone.

“My sister is going to be playing a fair down south in a few weeks. I think we can take the ultra-bullet,” I told her.

“I’d love that. Oh, I can’t wait to meet her and hear her band.”

My sister was so curious. I wasn’t sure what they’d make of each other. Hopefully, it would be good.

“Hey, this is so stupid, since I have camp in the morning, but do you want to watch a movie?” Her look grew shy as she bit her lower lip.

“That sounds perfect. Should I get us a snack? I only have a few things that I’d bought for the plane. I need to go shopping.” In the fridge, I found a couple beers, and I put some snacks on a tray. She might not have tried any of them.

“What are these flavors of chips? Crayfish? Cumin Lamb? Red Meat?” Gwen curiously read the packages.

“I like the spicy flavor best, but I ate them on the plane. Also, these are some of my favorite cookies.” I pushed the box toward her. “They’re matcha.” There was also a bag of salted plums and some jelly snacks.

“Oh, I’ve had these cookies before.” She opened the box and ate one. “Mmmm.”

We put on a movie, and I had fun getting her to try all the different flavors. When the movie ended, she looked about ready to pass out on my couch.

“You should go to bed,” I told her. “Are we back to our normal routine? It’s okay if your new living situation changes things.”

“It changes nothing other than you can take the subway with me in the mornings. I’d like that.” Her smile melted my heart.

“I’d like that a lot.” I was looking forward to getting back to our routine.

Cooter was absolutely right. I might not be ready to date again, but if Gwen wanted me, I’d be powerless to stop it.

How I hoped that one day I should be so lucky.