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Gwen

NOTE: This chapter contains content that might be upsetting to some readers.

I held my breath as the clock on my phone changed to midnight. His phone rang, and we jumped from our spots on the couch as we watched TV. My heart squeezed. Please be good news.

“Tell me they sent a contract?” Austin hopped up from the couch and paced our small living room.

The look on his face said it all. Austin knocked the lamp over.

I flinched as his spicy anger filled the small space. He’d had too much to drink as we’d waited for midnight. I hated it when he got like this.

One thing that had attracted me to Austin when we were teenagers, was that while he was a beast on the ice, and an ass with his friends, he was gentle with me. He saw me. Remembered little silly things about me. Was kind and undemanding.

Until recently…

“Did anyone else send a contract? What about Hungary? I have to have a contract now or I’m screwed. How many times do I need to tell you that? Not an invitation to a camp. A contract.” His anger flooded the space, and I made myself small on the couch.

He needed a contract by tonight? That was news to me–and not part of our plan. We should have done things differently if that was the case.

Why did he need a contract by tonight, when no one but the Aces could offer him a contract until right now?

“Get me a fucking contract by morning,” he yelled, then ended the call.

“I’m sorry you didn’t get a contract. Don’t you think you were a little hard on her though? I’m sure she’s trying her best.” I wrapped a blanket around myself for comfort.

“She works for me,” he snapped.

The entitlement made me frown. Like me, he valued hard work.

“What did you mean about needing a contract tonight?” I prodded, puzzled. We’d talked about our plan in great detail–and he’d never mentioned that.

His shoulders hunched and he plopped back down on the couch, but didn’t cuddle me. “When I moved to Rockland to play junior hockey, I made a deal with my dad and grandfather. I had until one month after university graduation to sign with a team. I had to do it on my own with no help–no connections, no financial assistance, no family name, nothing.”

“Didn’t your parents pass away?” Back in high school, he’d told me that he lived with his grandpa after his parents died and that it was so bad he basically ran away to junior hockey and went no-contact.

The similarities of our stories drew us to each other.

Austin grimaced. “I wish he died instead of my mom. He’s an asshole–so is my grandpa. I want nothing to do with them.”

“Is Austin Blake not your name?” I chewed on my lower lip.

“I lied. It’s not like you don’t have secrets,” he snapped.

“Hey, I’m not mad about that. I can only imagine what you must have gone through to feel like you needed to tell everyone your dad was dead,” I soothed.

I could forgive lying about his family, his past, and his name. After all, I understood that completely. My dads were assholes too, and I hadn’t talked to them in years.

Though I didn’t wish they were dead.

I surveyed him. “What now?”

“I have to go home and take my place in the family business. I hate them. They’re so toxic. Even my brothers.” He grimaced as he raked a hand through his blue hair. “They’re shitty, small-minded, conceited people, who want you to do everything their way.”

“Why didn’t you tell me about the deal? We should have structured the plan differently.” Sure, he didn’t talk much about his family, but this was an important detail.

“I… I almost told you so many times, but I was so sure the Aces would sign me,” he confessed.

“Me, too.” I squeezed his shoulder. “It’s awful that your family put you in this position.”

“I feel like I failed you. We were supposed to be a team. Play together, take the PHL by storm, form a pack, have a cute little house and kids,” he told me, remorse crossing his face.

“We can still do all that. You have until morning, right? We can come up with a plan by then.” I nodded.

His phone rang. There was no name on the screen, and it wasn’t an area code I recognized. Hope built within me. Maybe a team was contacting him directly? The international teams did things differently.

Austin looked at it, scowled, and hit the silence button. Oh.

“Maybe we should go to bed?” I offered, trying to make the best of things. “In the morning, hopefully, your agent will have a contract for you. If not, I’ll get out the spreadsheet, and we can go over all your options. We’ll make a presentation and convince your dad to give us more time.”

Surely, his father would listen to reason if we made a good case. There’d be plenty of time for Austin to take his place in whatever they did after he retired. Hockey players didn’t have long careers.

“Now I have to go work for them and do what they say.” He stood, the spicy scent of alpha anger raining over me. His phone rang again.

I took a deep breath. “I understand that you’re hurt and frustrated. But hey, I’m here. We can do this.”

“There’s no we. It’s over. That plan, that dream, is gone,” he roared, flipping the coffee table over

Confusion coated me and I took a step back at the violence. “I don’t understand. Just because you have to move home and work for your family doesn’t mean we have to break up. We’ve been together for so long, been through so much, we aren’t going to throw it all away for one setback, are we?”

My hands balled into fists as hurt and fear shot through me. I’d never seen him direct his anger at me like that. It was one reason he played hockey– a way to deal with his rage.

Was he truly going to end things because he didn’t get a hockey contract? Given how long and hard we’d practiced, the nights we spent dreaming, the sacrifices we made, it seemed ludicrous.

“I’ll fight for us, including convincing them to give you more time. We can still make it in the PHL together,” I assured. All this anger confused me. Did we mean nothing?

Was he using me?

“Oh, come on, if the PHL wanted you, you’d be on a team by now.” His face contorted with so much loathing that I didn’t recognize him.

My heart dropped. Was this the frustration and stress talking, or had he somehow hid this part of himself from me for all these years?

Was the man who brought me flowers and told me he loved me, the one who twirled me around on the ice, the one who’d lay in the dark and talk about the future with me, a lie?

“ You didn’t want me to put in for the draft, remember?” Now I was too old. “I haven’t signed with an agent or networked, or declared free agency since your plan called for us putting you first. Which is fine, but it also means that you can’t put me down for not being signed yet.” I didn’t raise my voice, but I put an edge to it.

The plan made sense given I was a goalie and we took a little longer to develop. Not to mention starting over at sixteen had slowed me down prospect-wise.

He sneered. “You’re not that good. I mean, you were when we were younger. I also thought you’d be an omega–and that would be our ticket. But no, here you are, just a dumb cunt beta who hasn’t even finished university yet. You’re too stupid to even take advantage of your job with the Knights.”

“You don’t get to talk to me like that,” I snapped, my face growing warm with anger. How dare he?

He thought I’d be an omega? Yeah, no.

“You know what, tensions are high tonight. I’ll stay with a friend so you can cool off, and we can talk this out in the morning.” Yeah, I needed to leave before I said something I regretted. This conversation was leaving me hurt, angry, and confused.

I grabbed my phone and backpack. In the bedroom I threw some things inside, not that I had much. This was his frustration talking, right? Doubt crept through me.

He blocked the bedroom doorway with his shirtless frame. “Where the fuck do you think you’re going?”

“I told you, I’m going to stay with a friend, and give us time to cool off. Do you want me to come by before or after work so we can talk this out?” I did a few deep yoga breaths as I threw more things into my bag. Something about this mood differed from usual.

“Friends? You have no friends.” A cruel grin toyed on his lips. Lips that had kissed me so many times.

“I do so.” My voice shook. His words hit me in the chest. While I knew a lot of people, I was always so busy with work, school, and hockey that I didn’t have many friends who I could call at midnight and ask to crash on their couch. Austin was my bestie.

“Fine, call someone right now.” He smirked.

“Okay.” Most people were away for summer. The few here barely had a place to live, let alone a place for me to stay. Bonnie was working late and her phone was off.

Oh, Clark had texted me? I’d try him. No answer. Shit. My stomach dropped. Carlos? He’d absolutely help me. But his phone was set to do not disturb.

“Wow. Sucks to be you. I guess you’re not fucking one of them. Always wondered with all the extra shit you did this year,” he spat.

“I’m not fucking anyone but you. The Knights made it to the playoffs, then won the championship, which makes the season longer. Please, let me pass.” I made my voice hard as I tried to find a space to squeeze through.

He thought what? Austin sometimes got jealous of me hanging out with the Knights without him, but I’d thought it was because they were pros. Not shit like that.

My shoes were by the door, my keys were already in my bag. If I had to, I’d go to the rink and work off my frustrations on the ice until my head cleared.

His phone lit up with texts.

Ris

Sorry you didn’t get the contract. If you want to stay with me instead of your dad, let me know. Love you.

It was like plunging into an ice bath.

“Who’s that?” My heart sank. Had he been cheating on me? I wasn’t sure how else to take that text.

“That’s your fault, you know. If I’d gotten the contract, we could stay together. Now we can’t and I have to mate with an omega they chose. I wasted so many years on you. I thought you were special, but you’re just some useless beta bitch.”

His words made me recoil.

“You don’t get to call me names. Do you honestly think our relationship was a waste? You didn’t think that when I was paying your tuition, making your food, and washing your underwear. When I put my goals, my dreams, on hold for you. ” The words turned bitter in my mouth.

How could he have kept all this from me? How did I not see it? No, I knew how I didn’t see it. Sometimes I was too tired to even finish my homework, let alone look to see if the man I trusted more than anyone was someone else.

“Sure, we had good times. But it doesn’t matter anymore. We can’t be together because I didn’t get a contract . You didn’t even end up being a fucking omega,” he spat.

There he went with the omega thing again. While sure, omegas were made for alphas, plenty of alphas married betas. Omegas were less than ten percent of the population to alphas, who were over a quarter, while betas were more than half.

“I never said I’d be an omega. People just thought that when we were in high school because I like fairy lights. I don’t want to be an omega. I… I thought you loved me.” All the life drained out of me as my voice broke. “I loved you. You were my everything.”

Tears pricked my eyes. I thought he was my forever alpha. My love. My one and only. I’d trusted him. Believed in him.

“I did love you. I wanted to be with you. Now I can’t. I told you, it’s over. There’s no we, because I didn’t get a contract. Also, my family would eat you alive. With your pink hair, your clothes, your tattoos and nose piercing, and your manners. They didn't even fix your nose right the last time you took a puck to the face,” he sneered.

“It’s only hair. I can be fancy when I want to be.” I flinched. Most of it was intentional, including taking several pucks to the face.

I ducked under his muscular arm. He grabbed me by the back of the shirt and threw me into the living room. Not only did he work out a lot, but alphas were stronger and faster, with better reflexes, by nature. They were leaders and protectors. Betas were the average everyday people who got shit done.

All the air whooshed out of me as I hit the couch.

“You bitch,” he roared.

Red swam before my eyes as I tried not to let the force of his anger overpower me. While we’d fought, he’d never, ever laid a hand on me.

“That’s it. We’re over. You don’t get to touch me like that.” I peeled myself up off the floor, grabbing my phone and backpack.

That was my uncrossable line.

“Get back here,” he yelled, tripping over the table he’d thrown.

“We’re done.” Voice and body shaking, I shoved my feet into my shoes and unlocked the door. When I turned to get my hoodie off the hook, something hit me in the forehead, knocking me backwards.

Pain seared through my head as an object clattered to the ground.

An ice skate. He’d thrown a fucking skate at me. It felt like the blade nicked me. Shit.

Without waiting another moment, I slipped out the front door and ran down the apartment hallway, shoving my phone in the pocket of my ratty sweats, so I didn’t drop it. Sure, he was bigger than me, stronger.

But I was fast.

“Where are you going?” he shouted down the hallway.

“You hit me, I’m out,” I yelled back, blood running into my eyes, which I wiped away. I had to get out of here. As much as leaving hurt, this wasn’t the man I loved.

This was someone else entirely. One that could kill me.

A body slammed into me, knocking me face first into the hallway wall, further aggravating the cut on my head. He spun me around, alpha body crushing me, as his hand smacked my face, then wrapped around my throat.

A tear trickled down my face as pain shot through me. How could I have ever loved him? Wanted to spend forever with him?

I kneed him the balls, and he let go.

“Fuck,” he yelped.

Free, I ran, fueled by fear.

“You’re nothing. You’re a fucking nothing who will never fucking make it,” he yelled as I careened down the stairwell, taking them as fast as I could.

I didn’t hear or see him follow, but I kept running until I reached the subway station, stopping occasionally to wipe the blood out of my eyes. I pulled my hoodie on to cover the blood on my face and continued to try to stem the flow. First, I’d go to the rink, use the first aid kit, and get myself together.

That sounded good.

Getting on my phone, I changed all my passwords. I blocked my location from him and took a picture of my face.

And ignored Austin’s mean texts.

“Are you okay?” a man who’d gotten on at my station asked. “Are you bleeding?”

“I… I’m on my way to get fixed. It’ll be fine.” I ducked my head more, not liking the attention.

Clark had texted.

Clark

Sorry I missed your call. Is everything okay?

Me

Broke up with Austin. Going to the rink to work shit out.

Someone should know where I was for safety.

By the time I reached the rink, Austin had stopped rage-texting me, so I replied.

Me

It’s over. I’ll be by after work tomorrow to get my things.

That was my only response. Maybe Clark and Carlos would come with me. I didn’t want to go by myself.

Where I’d put my stuff–or go–I didn’t know. It wasn’t like I had much. My hockey and class stuff, and some clothes.

The rink was nearly always open, but nighttime was quiet. I should find the first aid kit and get cleaned up. Instead, I found myself at the small rink, my tennies slipping slightly as I walked to the center and laid down in the darkness on the ice, exhaustion coating me.

It was comforting to lie on the ice, reminding me of better times when I’d do this on the pond at my nonna’s.

What had happened? I’d come home to a guy who made me brownies and left to someone throwing a skate at my head.

He’d never even raised his voice to me until this past year, let alone pinned me to a wall and tried to choke me.

I swallowed a sob. There was so much I didn’t understand. His deal. The complete mood shift. Why couldn’t we still be together even if he had to work for his dad?

Not that I’d give him a second chance. He hit me. That was it. No amount of apologies in the world would fix that.

My phone rang, but I was too tired to answer it as I sobbed.

What was I going to do? I couldn’t afford to live in New York on my own–or finish my degree. He was right. I’d lost my best paying job. I was homeless. Friendless. I didn’t even have a place to crash.

I’d trusted him. Invested everything in him. Never did I think I needed more than him and I’d made him my world. I hadn’t seen us as simply dating. To me, we were a young couple, starting our life together, figuring things out… together.

He’d betrayed me, leaving me with nothing .

The tears flowed fast and hard as I cried and cried until the world slipped away. Someone called my name as everything grew dim.

Hopefully, it wasn’t Austin coming after me.

But I was too tired to care.