Page 48 of Incubus (The Incubus Saga #1)

“I have to hit the bathroom,” Jim mumbled, pushing up from the table as soon as Sasha returned from performing up on stage. He was a little unsteady on his feet, but managed to make his way through the bar.

This left Nathan and Sasha alone.

Once Jim was out of sight, Sasha stood and threw on his coat, reaching for the guitar as well, now safely back in its case. “Come on,” he said to Nathan, nodding toward the exit.

Nathan was understandably puzzled. “Okay, I know Jim’s a little annoying and all when he’s drunk, but…”

A chuckle rose in Sasha’s throat and he shook his head. “We’re not ditching him. The line for the bathroom is crazy. We’ll be back before he finds the table empty. Come on. Grab Jim’s coat too so no one takes it.”

“What are we doing?” Nathan asked, though he obliged by putting on his coat and threw Jim’s over his arm to carry.

Sasha just smirked and started leading Nathan through the crowd, occasionally having to deal with people telling Sasha how good he had been up on stage. When they reached the front door they turned and headed upstairs rather than outside. Nathan had forgotten that the bar had an upper level.

There were only a few scattered couples on the roof since it was open air and winter in Chicago. The sky was large and clear above them, the stars dim due to the city lights, but still visible. Sasha led Nathan over to the empty, snow-covered bar.

As soon as Sasha set the guitar down on the countertop, he plowed Nathan back against the wooden wall. It was shadowy in the dark, but there were still people out there who could potentially see them.

“Sasha…” Nathan said warningly, but Sasha wasn’t listening. The incubus claimed his lips so hungrily, Nathan wouldn’t have been able to say anything else anyway.

Halfway into the kiss, feeling that deeply probing tongue and Sasha’s hands on either side of his face, Nathan forgot why he would ever want to tell Sasha to stop. He craved this connection, the way Sasha needed him and how their bodies fit together with hard muscle and strong holds.

“Come to my motel room,” Sasha said breathlessly when he pulled away. The hold he had on Nathan’s face dropped down to Nathan’s neck and shoulders.

“What?” Nathan couldn’t think straight, so he wondered if he had heard Sasha wrong.

Sasha smiled in the dark, his blue eyes almost ethereal—glowing. “When we get back to the motel,” he said, whispering still, hot and breathy against Nathan’s lips, “come to my room. I booked an extra one for tonight.”

“Jesus,” Nathan gasped. His mind felt hazier than any alcohol could manage, and he tried to grin in response to Sasha’s request, but he was shivering and there was nothing slow at all in asking such a thing of him. “Extra room, huh? What, you think you’re getting lucky tonight?”

A flash of white teeth responded. “Well, it is my birthday."

Nathan swallowed, hard and heavy in his throat.

“Nathan, I’m not expected anything. Well…maybe a little something. But whatever you want, whatever you’re comfortable with, that’s fine. Just come. Please,” Sasha said, his voice small despite the weight of the request.

And it was weighty. It had been weeks again since Sasha had fed from someone.

"Don't try and act like it’s easy, like it's not a choice between you sleeping with me...or having to sleep with somebody else." Nathan spoke softly but not bitterly—at least, not as bitter as he could have been.

Sasha's mirth crumbled, his suddenly mournful expression clear even in the dark.

"I don't want it to be somebody else, I just want us to be honest," Nathan spoke up quickly, and kissed Sasha again to banish any trace of that sadness.

When they pulled apart, Sasha was smiling again, if a little humbly. "I don't want it to be somebody else either."

“I should...probably tell you, though,” Nathan added. “Jim's onto us. More than guess work, he…pretty much knows everything.”

“Yeah…” Sasha said slowly. “I…kind of figured that after what he said when you slipped out to grab the guitar.”

“Said? What did he say?”

“Umm…it’s…not important.”

If Nathan could see properly in the darkness, he was fairly certain he would be able to see a blush in Sasha’s pale cheeks. “Sasha…” he prompted.

“He just asked how things were going, and when I asked ‘what do you mean?’, he said…well…'how are things working out being in love with my brother?'.”

Nathan was going to kill Jim, drunkenness as an excuse or not.

“And I said,” Sasha went on, grinning a little in the dark again, “much better now that he kisses back.”

Nathan laughed.

“Does it bother you?"

“It doesn’t seem to bother Jim , but if you two start braiding each other's hair, we are so finished." Nathan grinned wide and tugged on the collar of Sasha's coat. "Now let’s get out of here. Unless you can think of any reason to stick around?”

Sasha pulled in close to Nathan again, his arms wrapping around Nathan’s waist, hugging him while his lips ghosted along Nathan’s neck.

“Everything’s been wonderful tonight, Nathan.

Thank you. Really. No one’s ever…done anything like this for me before.

But yeah…” He pulled away, eyes twinkling brilliant blue.

“Calling it a night sounds absolutely perfect.”

Finding Jim wasn’t difficult. They managed to get back downstairs, just as Sasha predicted, before Jim had even gotten into the bathroom. They paid their tab and left soon after, Nathan tossing the keys to Sasha since he was the most sober.

Jim started to doze pretty quickly in the backseat. Nathan would have shoved his brother right out into the street somewhere if Jim brought up anything embarrassing while they were driving.

It was still pretty early for a night out when they pulled up to the motel. Nathan asked Sasha if he would mind bringing Jim inside for him so he could have a minute to get some air. Sasha eyed Nathan knowingly but obliged and, after a few moments, Sasha and Jim went slumping into the motel.

Nathan just needed some time to calm his nerves. No amount of trying not to think would save him from reality this time.

He took a deep breath. Sasha had said there was no obligation, not that Nathan ever followed obligations anyway, but there was still a sense of need there.

"Talk me down, Walter,” Nathan whispered, holding both hands to the hood of the car.

“Do you mean, talk you out of it?” came Walter’s calm and steady voice, “or talk you into it?”

Nathan turned around to face his Spirit Guide, who he often didn’t even try to get advice out of because there was very little Walter could actually tell him. “Uh…either?” Nathan said. “I’m not out of my mind for wanting this, right? I’m not being swayed or manipulated or just plain crazy?”

“Nathan,” Walter said, almost patronizing. “You don’t need me to answer that.”

“Right. So...I guess I better head inside then,” Nathan said, though he wasn’t as confident as he tried to sound. Knowing what he wanted and being able to take it were two very different things, especially when the universe seemed to align against him.

Two steps toward the motel door, Nathan stopped in his tracks, and not because of Walter or any lingering nerves.

“Nathan,” came Gabriel’s chillingly casual voice from somewhere behind Nathan's back. “You didn’t think you could hide from me forever, did you?”