Page 14 of His & Hers

“I’m not seeking perfection. I’m not seeking anything.”

“Maybe you’re asexual?” she said hopefully. She was obsessed with labeling people, much to my annoyance.

“But I like women.” I raised an eyebrow as we heard a knock at the door.

“Who likes women?” drawled my father as he stood in the doorway, grinning at me before winking at Charlotte.

“Alright, Charlie?”

“Mr. F.” Charlotte nodded back before his gaze flickered over to me.

“So come on then. How much did she offer last night?” Dad chuckled.

“No specific amount—”

“Zane. I’m very proud of you for not being a prostitute and all, but I have to say if a beautiful woman offered me money to fuck-”

“Dad, don’t finish that sentence. Please.”

“I’m just saying. It’s different for a guy,” he shrugged as Charlotte looked at us quietly.

“That’s not acceptable, Mr. F. If I wanted to sell my body for sex, you’d say that wasn’t okay because I’m a female?” she gasped as Dad stroked his chin thoughtfully.

“No, you’re different entirely. I wouldn’t comment on your actions.”

“How rude. I’d charge a fortune,” she declared, and I rolled my eyes.

“Really? What is the going rate then?” Dad asked, suddenly interested.

“Five G a night, Mr. F. Zane was offered five G for the whole night,” smirked Charlotte as Dad stared at me.

“Five grand foronenight? Demi Moore was offered a million.”

“I’m not Demi Moore.” I pointed out, as he shuddered.

“No, you’re not. I’d pay a million for a night with your mother.”

“Wonderful,” I said, my voice dripping in sarcasm.

“Where’s your sister?” he asked with interest, and I shrugged.

“No idea. Sorry.”

“Can you not send her a telepathic message? Tell her I need to know where she is.”

“Sadly not, Dad. It doesn’t work like that.”

“You could text her,” suggested Charlotte as she made the texting mime with her fingers. “I know you’re old Mr. F-”

“Shut your mouth, Charles.” Dad winked as he moved away.

“If you get offered five grand again, Zane, tell them for ten they can have me,” he called down the hall as I groaned inwardly.

My dad was a nightmare.

6

ALICE