Page 120 of His Atonement

"The purest of souls."

They remain silent, silent in what is obvious confusion until my sweet sister's brows fly to her hairline. "No… "

I nod. "He offered me my soul and my freedom in exchange for the purest soul, a soul belonging to one of you."

"Jesus H, brother,” Colt growls. "That's what that son of a bitch was doing when I saw you with him?"

I shake my head, open my mouth to answer but Cora interrupts. "You saw him?!"

Colt nods because he has no idea why he was able to see him, has no clue he shouldn't be able to see him, something my gem is absolutely aware of so I keep talking.

"No. When you saw me speaking with him that was after I had already willingly agreed to do as he asked."

"You what?!" Havok snaps, eyes glowing red. ”You motherfuck—"

"I only agreed because had I not, The Destroyer would have forced me to do it anyway, and He would have chosen who I was to collect from. He would have forced my hand, hit where it would hurt most and made it as painful as possible for all involved before turning me into a monster anyway.” I spit all that out so quickly I have to take a breath before I blurt the rest of this. "When you saw me in the woods with him he was merely reminding me that my deadline approached, that the many extensions I was able to barter for were coming to an end and reiterated what would happen if I did not deliver."

"Many extensions?" Cora asks as her eyes flood with a warmth I am not expecting. "You couldn't decide, could you?"

I shake my head. "No matter how I looked at it, no matter who I settled on, I could not justify taking the soul of anyone who lives here. Not in the core clan, not in the outside circle. Taking the soul of someone unwilling to give it means they would continue to live but as an angry, empty shell." Much like I will if I fail in doing what I plan to. "A zombie, so to speak, and it would in turn destroy the lives of those around them. Taking from one that is already tainted, collecting a soul already blackened by hate or greed, that is much easier and changes nothing but the eternal damnation they face as it becomes unchangeable. This would mean I'm damning a pure soul to an eternity of misery and I could not justify that, especially for those I care for. I was able to buy time withhe who shall not be namedby promising some of the souls I have collected over the years, the greedy bastard all too easily persuaded by what he cannot attain on his own."

"So what are you going to do?" Cora asks as she rubs her enormous belly. "And what does it have to do with Frankie or getting your name back?"

I drop my eyes to my coffee mug then slam it as if it were liquor. The more I sobered up, the longer I went without drinking prior to their arrival, my plan took on a much more solid shape, adjusted into what it is now and despite my resolution to see it through, the possible outcomes and reason for them are still horrible.

They shall hate me for this, I have no doubt.

“Fuck," Havok grunts as he pushes his hands back through his hair. "Tell me you did not do what I believe you did."

"What?" Cora looks between us.

Colt pushes off the wall and strokes a hand over his scruff. "Christ. Fucking shit, Zan."

"What?!" My gem sits a little taller. "What are you talking about?"

"He already did it.” Havok sighs.

Cora frowns and looks between the three of us.

“Frankie," Colt almost growls. "You took her soul before she killed herself, didn't you? That's why you guys have been so fucking weird, why you've been an insufferable prick. Not just because you knew she was going to do it, but because you knew you were going to take her soul first."

Cora immediately starts crying, something that breaks my heart even further. "Is he right?"

I nod. "It was Frankie's idea. She overheard my conversation withhe who shall not be named, demanded I tell her everything, then offered me her soul because she would no longer need it. My darling mate sacrificed her soul for mine."

"I'd like to be pissed at you for this.” Havok sighs again. "But honestly, I cannot. If Cora and I were in that situation I would have happily offered my soul in exchange for hers, would do it a thousand times over if need be."

Colt and Cora both nod, which leaves me speechless.

And is most likely why Cora speaks her next words. "It was obvious, the bond you and Frankie share, the love you have for each other. It makes sense that she would do that all considering what was about to happen. I get it. I would have done the same."

Well, I wasn't expecting that reaction.

"You do not…" I swallow hard, glance at my sister then drop my eyes. "Do not hate me for doing it?"

“No." She sighs as she wipes her tears. "It was a sacrifice she made out of love, one that caused the least damage and since she offered her soul willingly she won't be damned, right?"

Ok, perhaps now she will hate me.