thirty-five

Penelope

I hold Kai in my arms, tears streaming down my face as I rock back and forth. We’re in a room, and Liam, Ben, and Quinn are standing around us protectively.

None of us speak as we wait for either time to expire or Miles to come through the door.

I kiss the top of Kai’s head and keep chanting to whatever higher being there is to please let Miles come back to me.

I need him.

I love him, and want to spend the rest of my life with him—no, that’s not how it ends.

He loves me and that was not a proposal, I want him to say it to my face. Not as a way to get me to leave him in the hands of men who won’t hesitate to kill.

Ben steps closer to Liam, keeping his voice low. “One minute.”

Liam nods, and I track him moving around the room to Quinn. “We should move her and Kai. Get them out of the building.”

Quinn shakes his head once. “Not yet.”

“We are running out of time, Quinn. We need to get out of this building.”

I get to my feet. “We’re not leaving him,” I whisper. “He saved me, and we are not walking out of here without him, do you understand, Liam Dempsey?”

My brother and Liam both sigh at the same time. “Penny ... ”

“No.” Even though the word is barely audible, it rings out like a gunshot. There is no option here. “No, you go get him then. We’re not leaving here without Miles.”

Quinn turns to Ben. “You stay here with them and be ready to hit send to Ainsley, telling her to push the information immediately. Liam and I will go get Miles.”

Ben adjusts, moving us deeper into the room. “You both stay in that corner.”

I rest my hand on his arm. “Thank you.”

“Stay down and listen to whatever we say, okay?”

“Okay,” I reluctantly agree.

The three of them look at each other. “If we move, we can’t undo this.”

“It’s been a minute,” Ben says.

No, no, no.

No.

I refuse to accept this. That after all we’ve been through, I’ve lost Miles. I can’t.

He’s too good. He’s everything to me and he found me, just like he promised. Even though he didn’t know if I went willingly or not, he came for me and then saved me.

Tears fall unbidden down my cheeks in rivers. I have had my heart break more in the last five days than I ever knew was possible. I’ve felt despair deeper than I knew anyone could feel. I’ve also felt loved more than I deserve.

Miles walked into a room that he knew he might not walk out of—for me, for us. He allowed himself to be sacrificed just because he loves me.

It would be so cruel for the fates to give me this outcome after everything, but I see all three men check their watches, and the realization that time is up is clear in their eyes.

It’s been ten minutes, and Miles hasn’t come back.

He’s most likely gone, and it’s too late to save him.

I sink to the ground and cover my mouth as a sob tears through me, full of anger, sorrow, and anguish. Even though I muffle the sound, it rips through the room.

“We give him one more minute,” Quinn says after his eyes meet mine. “We don’t press send until we have Penelope and Kai secured out of the building.”

Liam looks to me with a sadness I’ve never seen there. He knows the outcome of this story. There is no happily ever after. The princess gets saved by the handsome prince only to be left planning his funeral.

I’m not living a romance—it’s a tragedy instead.

They check their watches and Quinn gestures his hand forward. Ben moves to me and I get to my feet, pulling Kai with me and starting to fight. “No. No, please, Ben. Please don’t ... I can’t leave him. I can’t go.”

“Penelope, we have to move. Your brother and Liam will do what they have to.”

I can’t give up on him. He didn’t do that on me. Not when I was scared or pulling away or threatening to leave him.

“Mommy, where is Miles?” Kai asks, and I keep him against my body so he can’t see me fall apart.

I hold it in, looking up to the sky as the agony of his loss is felt through my body. I hear Quinn and Liam open the door, but before they can take a step out, Miles is standing there with a smile.

His voice is thick as he stares into my eyes. “It’s over.”

Relief rushes through me, and he’s moving to me before I can unlock my muscles. Then he’s in front of me, his warm hands cup my cheeks, and his lips are on mine. It’s not a long kiss, but it’s the best one of my life.

He pulls back. “Are you okay?”

I nod. “You’re okay?”

He smiles and looks down at Kai. “And you, buddy?” Kai wraps his arms around Miles’s torso as an answer, and he pats his back. “Good. Now let’s go home.”

We are on a private plane back to Ember Falls. Ben, Liam, Quinn, and Miles have spent the last thirty minutes debriefing, or whatever they call it, with me sitting on Miles’s leg. He hasn’t let go of me since we were reunited .

Kai is sound asleep on the couch toward the back.

“I don’t think we have to worry,” Miles says, rubbing his thumb in circles on my hip. “He looked through the book before he made his choice, and he thinks we don’t understand anything that’s in it, since it was no help. Plus, he doesn’t know that Ainsley was already working on a story that he would’ve been tied up in, and with the new evidence she’s collected, I think he’ll be arrested within a day or two.”

Quinn nods. “I agree, he’s arrogant enough to think that him having the book is enough.”

“All of this sounds great, but they know where I am,” I say.

Miles pulls me tighter. “It doesn’t matter. We have the upper hand now, and the story Ainsley’s paper is going to run doesn’t mention you or the book. No one will hurt you or Kai. This is going to be over very soon.”

I nestle into him more, feeling like even if I could burrow inside him, it wouldn’t be close enough.

“Liam and Ben are going to stay in Ember Falls for a few days. Once the information breaks, it’ll be over,” my brother says with confidence before turning to Miles. “I was worried this would go much differently. I wasn’t sure ...”

Miles’s body tenses. “I wasn’t either for a minute. I think he thought we were bluffing at one point, and then I informed him time was up and he better kill me now or be ready to wish he was dead.”

“I’m glad he picked the right option,” my brother says as he extends his hand. “You have my respect and gratitude. Even if my sister drives me crazy, I couldn’t imagine my life without her. Thank you for not being willing to let her go.”

Miles shakes his hand. “There is nothing I wouldn’t do for her and Kai.”

Quinn nods once. “I know. You two should talk. We’ll head over there and give you some time together.”

The three guys get up, and Liam and Ben both shake Miles’s hand as well. We’re alone and he moves me so my legs drape over him. I’m tucked in the corner, and the back of the chair is providing us some privacy.

My fingers brush against his stubbled cheek. “Hi. ”

He grins. “Hi.”

“You love me?” I ask, even though I’ve felt his love in everything he does.

“Very much.”

“I love you too. With all that I am.”

The words come out much easier than I thought possible, but it’s the truth. He is everything I’ve ever wanted, and I’ve spent our entire relationship fighting this, but I don’t want to anymore.

He is the man I love, and he needs to know it.

Miles wraps his hand around my wrist, pulling it to his mouth and kissing the inside. “I love you with my entire heart, Penelope. When I thought you left me, I wanted to ... well, I was a bit dramatic. All I knew was that I had to find you, bring you back to me, find a way to make you see that we were right for each other.”

With my other hand, I brush his hair back. “I didn’t leave you.”

“I didn’t know. I ... I didn’t know and then I didn’t want to believe it.”

“I know, but I need you to know now. I would never have left you like that. Ever.” He must’ve felt so betrayed when he found my house empty. “How did you figure it out?”

Miles lets out a huff with a grin. “I found your brother and went to him, demanding he tell me where he moved you.”

“Oh God. You both must’ve been out of your minds.”

“No, sweetheart, we knew something was wrong and immediately sprang into action, looking at how someone would’ve gotten you out of Ember Falls.”

“It felt like it happened so fast. I was at the table with Kai, and next thing we were in the back of a van. I didn’t have time to do anything.”

The anxiety I felt bubbles back up. I wanted to believe they were coming for me, but I was prepared for the other outcome. I will never forget how it felt to think it was the last time I would see Kai. To recall Miles and the fact that I couldn’t tell him I loved him.

Miles brings our foreheads together. “I should’ve been there with you.”

I let out a small huff of a laugh. “No, this is not your fault.” I lean back to look him in the eyes. “You found me. You came for me, even though you thought I left you.”

“I told you I’d always search for you. I would’ve never stopped, Penelope. Never.” His eyes move to my cheek, and he brushes it. “Which one of them hit you?”

I blink in confusion. “What?”

“You had a red mark, right here.” Tenderly the pad of his finger slides against my right cheekbone. “I saw it when I entered the room.”

When I was backhanded. “It doesn’t matter.”

“I think it does.”

I shake my head. “None of that matters anymore. I’m here, in your arms, and safe.”

“Yes, you are.”

It’s the only place I want to be. I lean in, bringing my lips to his, still a little dazed that he’s here. His hand moves up my spine, gripping my neck and keeping pressure there before releasing it and pulling back.

The two of us look in each other’s eyes, saying so much. I want him to know how much I love him. How much he means to me.

“I love you,” I say the words again.

“Now, I meant what I said. Marry me.”

My eyes go wide. I thought maybe he forgot he said that. I didn’t really want to bring it up, but apparently, he wasn’t lying. “You . . . what?”

“Marry me, Penelope Walker. I love you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. We’ve both experienced the pain of being apart, and I never want to feel that way again. I love you and want you to be my wife.”

I suck in a breath, my mind going in a million directions. It’s too soon. We never even moved in with each other. Marriage? That’s ... nuts.

But is it?

I love him. He loves me. He literally walked in front of a bullet for me. Miles has shown me over and over that I come first. That he’ll always be there, whenever I need him. Whether it’s a storm or a hostage situation, I’ll never be on my own .

My hands cup his cheeks, staring into his eyes, looking for any glimmer of hesitation, but it’s not there. All I see is love.

“I’ll marry you,” I tell him. “Also, it’s Penelope Miller.”

I kiss him again, until I hear my brother gagging, and then I smile and bury my head in his neck.

I’m sitting on Miles’s bed—well, our bed, I guess now—drying my hair with a towel after taking the longest and best shower of my life, in his robe I found hanging.

Miles called Eloise when we were driving back from Virginia Beach, asking if she would go to the store to bring me some necessities and some clothes she had that she thought would fit. Since Ethan and Kai are the same size, she grabbed some of his stuff as well. She had everything in bags when we arrived home, because I have nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

They cleared out my house and destroyed all my belongings, leaving me and Kai without a thing.

It’s a funny feeling, being completely without. A lot of the things I owned I didn’t have an attachment to anyway. The furniture was used and there when we moved in, but Ember Falls, and that house in particular, became a home.

It was where Kai and I would laugh as we danced around the table where he did homework, and it was the first place I felt safe in. It’s where I first made love to Miles and where we spent most of our nights. That house held a lot of memories, and a part of me feels as though it’s been stripped from me.

I squeeze the excess water from my tresses, trying not to let my mind get hung up on things that don’t really matter. I have my life. I have my son and I have Miles. The rest is just stuff.

“I’ll trade you a penny for your thoughts,” Miles says as he’s leaning against the door, the light behind him making him almost look angelic. He enters the room, closing the door behind him. “Although, I already have the only Penny I want. ”

“You do?” I ask with a grin, instantly feeling better just from the sight of him.

“Yes, you are the only Penny I want or need.”

He comes to the edge of the bed and scoops me up in his arms. I wrap my arms around his neck. “Well, you have me.”

“I do.”

I do. Those two words strung together mean something monumental. I want nothing more than to be with him for the rest of my life, but I worry that his proposal was a spur-of-the-moment, we-almost-died kind of thing, and now that the dust has settled, maybe he wants to take it back?

I would completely understand, and it wouldn’t change anything, but I want him to be sure.

He sits down, keeping me in his lap, and I decide to give him the out if he needs it. “Miles?”

“Yes, love?”

“Are you sure about ... what you asked me on the plane?”

I feel him tense a little, and then his eyes meet mine. “Of course I’m sure. Are you having second thoughts?”

“No, nothing like that. I just ... it’s a lot and it’s fast and we almost died and ... you know. Sometimes people make really bad decisions in the heat of the moment.”

I would know, I’ve done it enough.

He reaches over, grabbing something out of the bedside table.

“What did you get?”

He places a velvet pouch on the bed and then with one hand opens it.

I gasp when I see the ring resting in his palm.

“Penelope, I knew I wanted to marry you after our third coincidental date. I knew there was no other woman in this world who could make me as happy as you did after our first real date. I would’ve married you the night we made love, but I knew that might scare you a bit. This was my gran’s ring that she wore until my pops died. It’s been in my family for a long time, and I went to her after our first official date and told her I met the woman I wanted to marry.”

Tears spring to my eyes as I look at the ring, not sure what to say. “Miles ... you don’t ... ”

“I planned to do this right, take you and Kai somewhere, ask him for his permission to marry you. Clearly that went a little sideways.”

“Clearly.” I brush the tears away, not wanting to miss anything from blurry vision.

He takes my hand. “I’ve never been more sure of anything, and while I didn’t get to ask you in a way that you’d know I was sure, I hope this proves it. I love you, Penelope Miller. I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?”

I smile, the weight of the world lifting. My tears fall and I nod. “I already said yes, but I’ll say it a hundred times. Yes, I want to marry you.”

“You’re sure?” he asks with a grin.

“I’m sure.” Miles slides the gold ring with a pear-shaped diamond on my finger. “It’s beautiful,” I say.

In the last few days I’ve felt the lowest of lows, and Miles just gave me a high I didn’t know was possible. I hoped that he wasn’t just asking me because of fear, but this shows it. How did I ever get so lucky?

“Not as beautiful as the woman whose finger it’s resting on.”

The diamond shimmers in the light, and I bring my hands to his face, kissing him softly. I pull back, knowing this next part is tricky. “I do want to ask if you’re okay if we wait a bit, let Kai settle in before we spring it on him.”

“I understand. He’s been through a lot, and I think we need to make sure he’s okay before we tell anyone. I’ll keep the ring, and when you’re ready, I’d like to ask you with him.”

The fact that he worries about my son above his own wants is why I love him so much. “I love you.”

“I love you, Penelope.”

He kisses me softly, and I imagine what this life could be.

When will we marry? Will it be a small wedding or does he want something big?

A part of me wants everyone to see us happy and in love. Also for Kai to get to watch us choose each other.

I want him to witness a relationship and how special and beautiful it can be.

Obviously, we’ll live here since he owns his home and our house is ... gone in a way. I’ll also want to make some bigger changes in my life regarding work. And then who knows about a family and if he’ll want more kids. It’s definitely something I wonder about.

I brush my thumb against his lips. “Do you want kids someday?”

I know I always wanted another, but I don’t know if he does. Miles is quiet for a bit, and then his voice is soft. “I didn’t. For a long time I was completely fine with being an uncle. When you came into my life, it became different. I not only fell in love with you, I fell in love with Kai as well. I want to be his father in every way that matters. You know my mother died four days after giving birth to me and Eloise, right?”

I nod and my chest aches at what he must’ve felt. “I know.”

“So I don’t know if I want more kids. I want to want them. I know, logically, that millions of women have perfectly normal births and don’t die from it, but I ... I can’t lose you, Penelope. If Kai is the only child we have and raise, I’d be okay with that. I promise I will love him like he’s my own. However, if we’re blessed with a baby, then of course I’d be happy. Terrified,” Miles says quickly, “but happy. Do you want another baby?”

My immediate reaction is to say yes, because I always have wanted a bigger family. I sort of gave up on that dream because life took me in another direction. Now it’s going in another turn, and the future feels so wide and unknown.

“I’m open to it, but”—I sigh, placing my hand on his chest—“I just want you for now.”