Page 3 of Heartstruck
Alli
“I should’ve joined a club or something,” I mumble to myself, pushing the last pin into the corkboard above my desk.
The burden of missing home still clings to me, but I shove it aside as I step back to assess the pictures on the wall—family moments frozen in time.
Each one stirs a pang of nostalgia, but dwelling on it won’t get me anywhere.
I should be grateful and make the most of my time here.
Earning a full-ride scholarship wasn’t luck; the least I can do is figure out how to actually belong.
Joining a club on campus couldn’t suck so bad, right?
Chess club?
No, I’d be horrible at it.
Book club?
Let’s be real… I wouldn’t last a week.
Hiking club?
Do I even own hiking boots?
“This is insane.” I strike, then begin to tidy the pile of homework on the desk.
It’s Friday night, and I finished all of it.
I even started on next week’s assignments.
My back aches from spending the afternoon hunched over my coffee table, trying to focus on biology in a spot that’s definitely not designed for studying.
I ended up saying no to Olivia’s invitation.
I wanted to be alone and at peace with myself, and apparently, with the worst posture known to man.
I grab my phone and call my older cousin, Evelyn.
She’s the whole reason I’m studying hours away from home.
Evelyn is like the older sister I never had.
As a girl with three older brothers, I always wished for a sister, someone who could balance out the endless sea of testosterone.
When she moved from California, I wanted to be like her.
It sounds pretty psycho, but she was everything I idolized as a young girl.
She’s beautiful, confident, smart, and her personality lights up the room the second she walks in.
As we got older, our bond grew stronger.
She took me out on late-night drives and weekend coffee runs before hitting up TJ Maxx—she was always there.
She’s the one who encouraged me to apply to Carolina Coast University, insisting it would be an amazing opportunity.
‘We can’t spend our whole lives in the same town,’ she’d said, practically shoving the application into my hands. And maybe she was right.
“Hi, Alli girl! How’s my favorite prima doing?” Evelyn’s cheerful voice greets me.
“Hey, Evie,” I say in return, feeling a little better just hearing her voice. I sit down on my bed, absentmindedly picking at the corner of my textbook. “I’m… okay. Just feeling a little homesick, I think.”
“That’s totally normal,” she assures me. “I remember my freshman year was rough. Sophomore year was better, though! You’re tougher than you give yourself credit for. You’ll figure it out.”
I exhale slowly, her words easing the tightness in my chest. “Thanks, Evie. You’re the best. Seriously, I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
“Of course! So, what’s up?”
“I was supposed to go to this party tonight,” I admit, glancing at my reflection in the mirror across the room, “but I bailed to study. Now I’m second-guessing it.”
“Definitely go,” she urges. “You need to have some fun and make some memories. College isn’t just about studying, you know. It’s about finding yourself all while having fun.”
“I know, I know.” I sigh, running a hand through my hair. “It’s just, I feel out of place moving here. Can you remind me why I decided to enroll at CCU?”
“Because you’ve loved science ever since you were a kid and got that full-ride scholarship,” she says, her voice calming, like she’s trying to remind me of what I’ve accomplished.
“Plus, you wanted to challenge yourself and experience something new. With that being said, definitely go to the party and let your hair down.”
“I guess you’re right,” I say, my lips curving into something more genuine.
“When am I not?” Evie’s teasing voice comes out. “Anyways, I have to go. Call me tomorrow and let me know how the party goes.”
“Of course, te amo .”
“ Yo te quiero también. ”
Evelyn’s words bounce in my mind like ping pong, reminding me of why I chose this path in the first place. I send a quick text to Olivia, letting her know I changed my mind. I stand up and walk to my closet, rifling through my clothes to find something cute for the party.
I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror and pause. “You can do this,” I tell the girl staring back at me. “You belong here.”
With a deep breath, I put on my favorite black top and mom jeans, feeling confident as fuck. Tonight, I’m having fun. I’m stepping out of my comfort zone and embracing the adventure that college is meant to be.