Page 10 of Heartstruck

Alli

What the hell did I just agree to?

The question bounces around in my head like a ping-pong ball in an empty gym as I push the door open and step inside the apartment.

The faint, sweet scent of vanilla clings to the air, but the place feels deserted.

Too quiet. My bag slides off my shoulder and lands on the kitchen counter with a dull thud.

A neon Post-It, barely hanging on to the fridge door, flutters dramatically like it’s auditioning for a rom-com.

Olivia’s unmistakable handwriting sprawls across it.

Went to Sigma’s party, don’t wait up on me!

Xo, Olivia

I collapse onto the couch, the weight of my stress hitting me all at once.

I glance at the coffee table, where my half-finished notes for Genetics are scattered among textbooks.

Ever since my desk broke—one of the legs gave out when I accidentally leaned on it—I’ve been studying at the coffee table or dining table.

It’s not ideal, but I’m making it work, despite my back protesting the lack of comfort.

I really need to find a new desk on Craigslist, but I just don’t have the time with quizzes, lab reports, and my paper on genetic mutations.

And now, I’ve added “fake girlfriend” to the list. What was I thinking?

I shake my head, trying to shove the stress and swirling thoughts into the far corner of my mind.

There’s no point in overanalyzing it now since it’s a done deal.

Besides, it’s not like this arrangement with Jared actually means anything.

It’s just a temporary fix to an awkward problem.

I’ll play my part, he’ll play his, and then he’ll owe me one. Simple. No big deal. Right?

Easy peasy.

I wander into the kitchen, pulling open the fridge door and lazily scanning the shelves for something that doesn’t require more effort than breathing.

The soft hum of the refrigerator is almost deafening in the quiet apartment, which starkly contrasts the constant noise of campus life.

It’s my “home away from home,” the place where I can unwind and be myself.

I grab a carton of rocky road and a spoon, then settle back on the couch, savoring the peace and watching a rerun of You’re The One.

Halfway through Noelle and Brody’s conversation, where Brody confesses he wants more than friendship but Noelle insists she wants to meet new people around the cabana, I can hear the occasional whoops and cheers of students heading off to the campus parties.

The sound drifts in through the window, adding to the excitement around me.

I pull the blanket tighter over my legs and sink into the couch, trying to lose myself in trash reality shows.

My phone lights up with an incoming FaceTime call from Serena.

I hit the mental pause button, my thumb hovering over the screen like it’s a live wire.

Normally, she’d never call me on a Friday night, especially not when Tyler is visiting.

That’s when they usually have their “couple time,” and she stays away from everything else.

So, this must be important? Maybe Jared talked to her.

I’m not sure how much I’m ready to explain or what I even want to tell her right now.

“Allison Grace Castillo,” Serena drawls, her eyes dancing with amusement.

Not my government name… She knows.

“So, I heard from a bird you’re dating Jared? Confirm or deny for me.”

I roll my eyes. “I’m pleading the fifth.”

“So it’s true!” she exclaims, a mischievous grin spreading like wildfire across her face.

I battle between deception and honesty: torn between lying to Serena about the fake dating with Jared or telling her the truth and facing my insecurities. Lying feels wrong, like I’m hiding a part of myself, but telling her would mean exposing everything.

Serena’s dealt with more than her fair share of hardships, and the last thing I want is to add to her worries.

But keeping this from her? It feels like I’m breaking some unspoken code between us.

She’s always had my back, been my voice of reason, my ride-or-die.

The least I owe her is the truth. But the thought of confessing everything—the fake dating, my struggles with confidence, and the weird situation I’ve gotten myself into—makes my stomach churn.

I don’t want to unload all of that onto her, especially when she has her own life to handle, and things are finally looking up for her.

So, I make a choice, one that might bite me in the ass later.

“It’s true.” I say, channeling whatever confidence I have left to push those words out.

Serena’s eyes go wide with excitement. “No way! When did this happen? I thought you swore him off that summer after—”

I shake my head, stopping her mid-sentence. “Can we not talk about the past?”

“But…” Serena arches an eyebrow, curiosity practically radiating off her, but she reads the room and decides to let it go.

“Alright, alright,” she says, leaning back in her chair with a mock surrender.

“But seriously, how? We don’t have to revisit the past, but you’ve known Jared forever.

Like, you knew him pre-puberty when he was hideous . ”

I can’t help but laugh at Serena’s blunt assessment. “Things changed, and so did feelings.”

“What’s changed, though?”

I sigh, feeling years’ worth of guilt settle over me. She’s really digging into this, and I can’t help but feel horrible for not being honest. “He’s just been there for me since the semester started, so we decided to give the relationship thing a try.”

Serena nods thoughtfully, her expression easing. “Makes sense. If you’re happy, I’m happy. I’m also glad since this means his fan club will keep their distance.”

“Fan club? It’s probably like two or three girls.” At least that’s from what I’ve seen around campus.

“He hasn’t told you? Wow, already starting off as a bad boyfriend.

” Serena jokes, then she clears her throat and looks around as if to check no one’s within earshot.

“He’s been telling people he left Clemson because of personal issues, but really, there was a girl on campus that was completely obsessed with him. ”

“How bad was it?”

“ Muy tóxica .” Serena says with an exaggerated Spanish accent, trying to mimic what she’s learned from me.

“The girl was actually insane. She would find out what bars and parties Jared would go to, watch him all night, and follow him around like a puppy. It started off inoffensive, smiles or winks here and there, but it grew to the point where she switched her major to be in his classes. She even paid a girl to drop out of a few classes so she could take her spot. Alli, this girl wanted to be an accountant and suddenly switched to Biology. It was horrible. The breaking point in this whole ordeal was her camping outside his dorm for a week because he wasn’t showing up to class when he got sick. ”

I stare at the screen, speechless. “That’s… terrifying. No wonder he wanted to leave Clemson.”

“Yeah, it was a mess. I can’t believe he hasn’t told you about it.

But I guess it’s not exactly something you want to bring up on a first date,” Serena’s tone shifts, her voice dropping to something serious.

“Just be careful, okay? There’s a restraining order in place since Jared is so popular in college football… but anything could happen.”

I nod, processing everything. “Thanks, Serena. I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Of course,” she replies, her features relaxing. “Just take care of yourself. And if you ever need to talk about anything, I’m always here.”

We chat for a little while longer before saying our goodbyes.

The idea of Jared dealing with a stalker is disturbing, to say the least. And now, I’m even more unsure about our fake relationship. But one thing is clear: if we’re going to go through with this, we need to be on the same page about everything. Including the past.

My phone buzzes again, snapping me out of my thoughts. I figure it’s Serena calling back with more of her nonsense, so I absentmindedly grab it while digging into my ice cream. To my surprise, it’s not Serena at all. It’s Jared. FaceTiming.

My stomach does a weird little flip as I stare at his name lighting up the screen. I swipe to answer the call.

“Hey,” I say, trying to sound casual, even though I know the worst story of his life.

“Hey, what are you up to tonight?”

I nibble on my lip, trying to think of a response that doesn’t reveal how weird this whole situation is. “Just hanging out at home.”

“No hot plans?”

I shake my head, rolling my eyes slightly. “I’m not really in the mood to party all the time. Honestly, it’s just stressful to be social like that.”

Jared chuckles, the sound warm and easy. “Well, I was going to ask if you wanted to hang out tonight, but it sounds like you’re already settled in.”

I look around my apartment, noting the half-eaten tub of rocky road on the coffee table and the fuzzy blanket wrapped around me. “Yeah, I’m pretty settled,” I admit with a small smile. “It’s just me, ice cream, and the TV tonight.”

“Mind if I join?”

“No hot plans?”

He shakes his head, and the tip of his lips lifts upwards. “Nah, I like to be a homebody too, you know?”

I roll my eyes, unable to stop the chuckle that slips out. “Sure, sure.”

“Sure, as in come over?”

I pause, glancing around the empty apartment again. The silence is almost too much. “Only if you bring snacks.”

Jared laughs, and I can’t hide the grin spreading across my face. “Deal. I’ll bring the best snacks in town.”

“Don’t disappoint me,” I warn.

“I won’t. I’ll be there soon,” Jared assures, his voice light, before ending the call.

I set my phone down and look around my apartment again, suddenly aware of the scattered textbooks and overall mess surrounding me.

Quickly, I start tidying up, stashing the textbooks on a shelf and fluffing the pillows on the couch.

This is just a casual hangout, nothing more.

But as I finish straightening up and hear the knock at the door, I can’t deny the cities of butterflies in my stomach.