Page 34

DAMIEN

TWO WEEKS LATER

S elwin was due to arrive any minute now, and I was pacing the ice.

The photographer was already here, and so was Dave, acting as the school’s PR rep.

But hopefully not for long. A couple of hours, tops.

Having outside people observing my players wasn’t exactly conducive to a full day of training camp.

Not for my players or for me. I needed everyone focused, not distracted.

And speaking of major distractions, I glanced over at Silas, who stood near the net, talking to Finn, Dane, and Ethan.

My gaze never strayed far from him. Not today, and not for the past two weeks.

Outside of camp, we stole every spare moment away together and it still wasn’t enough.

The sex kept getting hotter, and more than that, what blew my mind every time, was that the conversations between us had no end.

It took us forever to end any text exchange or phone call, and when we were together, there was always one more kiss that we had to steal.

I didn’t want to let go. I couldn’t.

There was no doubt about my feelings; I was in love with Silas.

But falling was one thing, sneaking around was another.

We couldn’t hide forever. I wanted to hold his fucking hand and not just in the privacy of my home.

I knew he wanted the same, but how? When?

I was trapped in a maze of my own making, with no clear exit in sight.

There was no one I’d rather be confined with than my sarcastic defenseman, but damn, I wanted to stand with him in the light.

“Damien!”

I turned to find Selwin staring at me from the other side of the boards, suited up in his hockey uniform, giving me that shit-eating grin that told me today was going to be one for the records.

“You finally made it,” I quipped. “I was about to call Aleksi to see if he could switch days.”

“What? No way. No second best for Sutton U,” Selwin returned with his trademark grin and stepped out onto the ice.

“I dare you to say that to his face.”

“I’m silly, not stupid,” Selwin remarked.

I skated over to my friend, and he brought me in for a hug.

“You look amazing, D,” Selwin whispered, and then not-so-subtly glanced down the ice. “And one guess as to why.”

“Later,” I replied quickly. “For now, you’ve got players to mentor.”

“Lead the way.”

We skated off down the ice, and I watched as each player offered their hand to Selwin.

Sel lapped up all their attention, making jokes and putting everyone at ease.

Silas, who normally reserved his comments for snarky comebacks aimed at me, peppered Selwin with tons of questions about the upcoming season, while Finn, who was always talkative, stood there silently staring into space like he’d been hit by the Zamboni.

Meeting a hockey idol had a strange effect on players, and mine were no exception.

After almost ten minutes of talk, I motioned for everyone to get moving. Everyone but Sel and Silas headed off down the ice.

“I said, let’s get to work.”

I blew my whistle hard and Selwin covered his helmet with his gloved hands.

“Not in my ear, man.”

“Then go get warmed up,” I warned.

“How do you put up with him?” Selwin quipped as he nudged Silas’s arm.

“It’s hard, no doubt.” Silas replied and gave me a grin that was way too dirty for a morning practice. “Damien’s a total pain in my ass, but I have to say I enjoy it.”

Selwin laughed at that comment, but thankfully, no one else heard our conversation.

“Enough shenanigans,” I insisted, trying not to react to Silas’s words. “Both of you.”

They skated off together, my lover and my oldest friend.

I watched the scene with a pang in my chest. We all knew, and yet nothing could be said.

Or done. What was I going to do? Nothing.

I couldn’t do fuck all to change the situation I found myself in and I didn’t like it one bit.

For a guy who preferred his private life to stay that way, I was frustrated with hiding what was going on between me and Silas.

Instead of feeling defeated, I got my ass in gear and set up the scene for our first set of drills. The guys worked hard for over an hour, and by the time we were ready for our first break, the journalist slash photographer, along with Dave, had arrived.

I lost control of the narrative at that point.

There were posed pics of the guys with Selwin, interviews, photos of the guys in play, and more questions for me about the camp.

After an hour of media relations, I had a blooming headache and a desire to never smile again. Dealing with the press was always my least favorite part of the hockey job and that hadn’t changed. I had a limited capacity when it came to peopling, and I’d hit it.

While the guys were still talking to the journalist, I scuttled off to my office to take a much-needed break. I shoved my headphones on, blocking out further noise, and grabbed my laptop so I could work on the afternoon strategy session.

I was ten minutes into enjoying my bubble of peace when I hear the knock on my door.

“Come in!” I shouted.

Silas entered the room, his helmet in one hand, his hockey stick in the other, looking disheveled and way too hot for me to be alone with him. He dropped his gear, slammed and locked the door, and rounded the desk before I had a chance to say anything, never mind “what are you doing?”

He grabbed hold of me, kissing me fiercely. I tasted his sweat and traces of orange Gatorade. Delicious.

“Couldn’t wait any longer,” he murmured, taking my lips softly this time.

“Baby, I was trying to be good.”

He smirked and rocked his hips against mine. “Good’s overrated.”

“Do you think anyone, I mean, anyone other than Selwin, suspects?”

Silas licked his lips. “Finn knows. I told you that.”

“Right.” I nodded. “No one else?”

“Nope,” Silas confessed. “But I’m sick of lying.”

“Soon everyone’s going to know. We’ll be the worst kept secret at Sutton.”

“Is that such a bad thing?” Silas asked.

I cupped his face, rubbing my thumb over his lips, tracing the curve of his smile. “I don’t know anymore.”

“My family knows, Finn, Selwin. I feel like I want to tell more people.”

“More?”

“Like, everyone. Sooner rather than later.”

I sighed and kissed him again.

“Baby, I love you, but that’s a huge step.”

Silas’s inhaled sharply and crowded me back against my desk.

“You what?”

It was too late to take the words back and I didn’t want to. I wasn’t one to shy from the truth, especially when I was looking at him.

“Damien, say that again.”

I stared into his eyes.

“I love you,” I declared, my voice hoarse with emotion. “You stole my fucking heart, Silas.”

He smiled against my lips.

“Told you I was ruthless,” he teased. “And fair’s fair, you took mine.”

“You want to know what else?” I whispered, happiness surging in my veins. “I don’t want it back.”

Silas’s husky laughter filled my office.

“Even better, because I’m keeping it,” he countered with another kiss. “I love you, too, Damien. So much.”

Shivers wracked my body, and I clutched tightly to him.

Was this the ideal time for us to confess our feelings? Fuck no. Did either of us give a damn in that moment? Nope.

“We’ll celebrate tonight. Right now, we’ve got training to continue.”

Silas gave my ass a playful swat. “I’m so going to show off this aft.”

“Focus on the game, remember. Not me.”

“Yes, Coach.”

“Now get your ass back out there.”

Silas slowly stepped back, and much as I didn’t want to let go, I braced my shaky hands on my desk.

“Meet at your place after?” he asked.

I nodded.

Silas picked up his gear and headed for the hallway. I dropped back onto my chair and ran a hand through my hair. Yup, I was still shaking.

I told Silas I love him. And he loves me.

Giving myself a minute to process, I reached for the water bottle on my desk and took a big gulp to wash down my fear.

Loving Silas meant I had a lot more to lose if things came out and there was backlash.

We were so caught up in each other that we forgot reality was right here.

All around us. It wasn’t easy having players that were dating on the same team, not for them, for their teammates, or for the school, especially when I had to explain to outsiders what was going on.

And me being involved with a player? How would that go down? Not well. Not well at all.

I hated that I couldn’t even enjoy this moment, too worried about all the what-ifs.

It was like my last night as a pro player, the night my knee got fucked up.

Once I was in motion, there was no stopping the collision.

By the time I got hit, it was too late. Not that I could change anything; accidents happen. And I didn’t regret my time on the ice.

I certainly didn’t regret falling for Silas, but I was afraid for him.

I only wanted to protect him, not be the very thing that he needed protection from. And when word got out, a shitstorm would unleash. That, I knew. I’d been trying for weeks to find a solution, but I still had no answer.

Would it come to me? Hopefully, not too late.

Slipping on my jacket, I grabbed my tablet and made my way back to the ice.

There was already a three-on-three game happening, with Selwin acting as referee, critic, and coach.

The journalist, a guy named Cillian—I couldn’t remember his last name—was still here, still taking photographs, but he was seated in the stands instead of on the ice.

I looked around but there was no sign of Dave anymore. He must’ve headed home.

I stepped out onto the ice in time to watch our captain deke around Finn and Colin, slamming the puck home.

“Yes!” Dane shouted.

“That’s 3-1 for Dane’s team!” Selwin called out. “Finn, you let him slip past you, again. What did we talk about?”

“Obviously I can’t remember,” Finn commented and skated off.

His posture slumped, frustration obviously setting in. I called Finn over, concerned.

“Is everything okay, Finn? How’s your mom?”

“She’s good. Her spirits, I mean. The results aren’t back yet, but the doctor says a few more days. The waiting is taking forever.”

“I’m sorry. If you need to skip a day of camp, let me know.”

“I’d rather be here,” he admitted.

“It seems like you’re having trouble focusing.”

“I’m having an off day, but I swear it’ll pass.”

“Rest up tomorrow. Wednesday will be better.”

“Thanks, Coach.”

They continued their game and Dane’s team finished it off, 5-2.

I called an end to the day, and while the guys took off, I stayed on the ice to chat with Selwin.

Ten minutes later, he headed off too. But not before we’d agreed to meet in town at Boots ‘n’ Burgers for dinner. He told me to invite Silas along too.

Tonight was going to be interesting to say the least.

The rink was quiet again, almost too quiet.

I was halfway to my office, wrapped up in my head, when I was suddenly grabbed by a familiar set of hands and shoved against the wall.

“What the—” I startled and looked up. “I thought you already left.”

Silas chuckled and held me tighter.

“Nah. But everyone else has. It’s just you and me.”

He leaned in and kissed me, stealing my breath and making me forget everything except how right I felt in his arms. I don’t know how long we stood there, seconds, minutes, his tongue teasing mine as we made out.

Until I heard what sounded like a door slam.

“What was that?” I asked, reluctantly pushing him away.

Silas shrugged. “Probably the ice machine in the lounge.”

“No, it sounded like a door closing,” I replied, my heart pounding hard. “Let’s take this to my office.”

“It’s a little late for that,” a voice echoed in the hallway.

I turned my head, and fucking hell, the journalist, Cillian, was standing at the exit, his camera in hand, aimed at us.

“With the exception of meeting Selwin Kirkland, today was boring as hell. I didn’t even want to stay this afternoon, but the dean insisted, and what do you know?

” Cillian replied with a smug expression.

“Now I’ve got a real story, one that’s going to make actual headlines.

The public loves scandal, and a coach and his player fucking around?

I couldn’t have asked for anything juicier. ”

My heart dropped along with my stomach.

“There’s no scandal,” I insisted, stalking down the hallway and getting up in the journalist’s face. “And nothing to report on.”

“Are you kidding me? I caught you sucking face with your student. It’s news all right.”

“What it is, is none of your business,” Silas barked behind me. “And if you took a photo of us now, you better delete it.”

“Why? This is a public space.”

“The rink is private property,” I corrected. “School property.”

“I was invited.”

“The camp is over for the day, and we didn’t consent to that photo. Besides, there’s nothing to report,” I interrupted, Silas standing by my side. “So go ahead and write whatever you want. It doesn’t matter.”

“Of course it matters,” the reporter countered and stared at me like I’d lost my mind. “Why wouldn’t it?”

“Because—” I glanced at Silas.

No matter what, I’d protect him. There was no other way.

“Because… Silas and I are married.”