Page 16

SILAS

D id I stick to practice like I was told to? Yes, but my concentration was shot to hell.

My curiosity about Damien’s ex had me wanting to follow him off the ice.

My defensive instincts pinged loudly and that didn’t make any sense at all.

Damien didn’t need my protection. The very idea was ludicrous.

Still, from everything I’d read, and what Damien said, his ex-wife sounded like a narcissistic puck bunny.

Why was she here, now? Did she want him back?

“Banning looked shook up when he left,” Finn offered as he nudged my arm. “What’s that about?”

“His ex-wife is here.”

“Shit, that can’t be good.”

“Exactly. And before that, I came out to him.”

“How did he react?”

“He’s fine,” I replied as I took a sip of water. “No worries. Just like I expected.”

“Banning’s cool.”

“He is.”

Damien was a lot more than that. He was brutally honest in his opinions, he worked as hard as his players, and he was fierce as hell when it came to hockey.

All in, he was the most intriguing guy I’d ever been around.

Smart, sharp, and sexy. It made me wonder why the guy was still single.

If he was single. Not that I should be assuming or wondering about my coach at all.

What type of women did he go for? Or what type of men, for that matter? I thought about that queer bar in Chicago and more questions rattled around inside me like a pinball machine. Once I started, I couldn’t stop. It was foolish, but I couldn’t help it.

Finn nudged me again. “Dude, why’s your face purple?”

Jesus, so much for keeping these crazy feelings about Damien under wraps. I downed another gulp of water, hoping—no, praying—that it would calm me down.

“It’s the workout. Hardest one we’ve had in months. Even leading up to the finals.”

“I know. Coach was all over you this morning.”

I choked on a mouthful of water and nearly showered my friend.

“Seriously, Si?” Finn chuckled and glanced at me with a knowing smirk. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing.”

Nothing except my dirty imagination. All I could picture was Damien and me getting sweaty, minus the hockey equipment. Okay, maybe a jersey was involved in my fantasy. That would be hot too…

“Earth to Silas?”

“I’m fine.” I cleared my throat. “Promise.”

“Then let’s get back to it.”

I nodded and placed my towel and water bottle on the bench behind the boards. Dane and the rest of the guys rejoined us, and we played a quick game of three-on-three.

I didn’t see Damien’s return so much as feel his presence nearby, and I couldn’t help the shiver of awareness that snaked up my spine, goosebumps popping up all over my skin.

It took everything in me not to look over at him.

I could pretend my reaction was due to the cold air but that would be total bullshit.

But this recognition of him, or whatever the hell was going on, was disturbing as fuck.

I wasn’t in sync with other people that way, except when it came to hockey.

Outside of the rink, my teammates, and my family, I was a loner at heart, and I fully accepted the fact.

I didn’t need or want anything from anyone else.

So why did I feel this connection to Damien?

Okay, he was smoking hot, but so what? I noticed plenty of guys and that was nothing more than sex.

I wasn’t curious to “get to know them,” not even Darby.

I was satisfied with getting off and getting gone.

But Damien? I wanted to talk to him, to tell him stuff I didn’t talk about with anyone.

Even worse? I wanted him to do the same with me.

No. No way. That line of thinking was asking for trouble I didn’t need.

How about you refer to him as Coach or Banning instead? Keep some of that distance you’re so good at maintaining with everyone else?

Right. Exactly. I would do that.

“Time for lunch, guys. Leave your sticks on the bench,” Banning called out, and we all came to a sudden stop. “Meet up in the lounge.”

Coach—see, I could do this—stalked off before anyone could reply.

We skated off the ice and headed for the locker room, quickly changing out of our gear and into jeans and sweatshirts, and headed for the equally drafty breakroom, or the lounge, as we preferred to call it.

With two couches and a couple of chairs, the space was small and cramped when the entire team was here.

Given there were only seven of us now, Banning included, it was a perfect fit.

There was a table set up against the far wall, and on it, trays of sandwiches and wraps, bowls of fruit, and desserts, along with bottles of Gatorade, juice, and water.

I was the last one in line and snagged two turkey wraps, an apple, and an orange Gatorade, and then plunked myself down on one of the couches.

Of course, there was only one seat left, and I was sitting directly across from Damien… Banning. Then I noticed that he had the same exact lunch as me.

“I think you forgot something,” Damien muttered and pointed to my plate.

I stared at him, confused.

“You’re going to need more than two wraps to keep you energized for this afternoon,” he added with a smirk.

“I’ll grab another one in a bit,” I replied. “Make that two.”

I took a big bite of the first wrap and groaned loudly in appreciation. The soft tortilla was stuffed with smoky bacon, thick slices of turkey, tomato, and a ranch dressing that tasted homemade.

Banning raised one eyebrow.

“What? It’s damn good,” I stated.

Banning shifted in his seat and then finally began to eat. My eyes caught on his mouth, and the way he licked his lips after taking a mouthful of his sandwich. The guy made everything, including eating, look sexy, and I couldn’t look away from his lips.

Stop eye-fucking your coach…

I forced my gaze back to my plate. Until I heard Damien’s rumbling groan. When I glanced up again, he was halfway through his wrap.

“See?” I smirked knowingly.

“Eat, don’t talk,” Banning grumbled in response.

Despite his snarky comment, I caught the humorous glint in those stunning eyes, like we were sharing an inside joke. The joke was all on me at this point. If Damien knew what I was thinking right now, he’d tell me to get out of this rink, and this team, for good.

Thankfully, Finn sat beside me and began to chatter away, distracting me.

Once everyone downed enough food to refuel, Damien set up his laptop and a mini projector so we could watch replays of past games.

Our games and pro ones too. We spent over an hour reviewing the plays and bouncing ideas off one another.

From forechecking, to maintaining puck possession to power play execution, it was all on the table.

During the regular season, I’d often stay silent when it came to these types of discussions.

I played by instinct, not analysis. But this camp wasn’t about watching from the sidelines or doing our usual.

Damien demanded that we all participate, even me, even if it meant forcing myself outside of my comfort zone.

I thought I’d be bored as fuck, but it turned out to be the total opposite. Being in a smaller group was helping me focus.

It also made me aware of Damien in a way that was fucking intense. I wanted more of his attention and not all of it was about hockey. Fuck me, this hard-on I had for him was getting out of hand.

Hockey was a high-risk sport. My reaction to Damien, even more so.

I needed to find a guy to hook up with. Any guy. Anything to take my mind off him . This weekend, it was happening. Then everything would return to normal.

When we hit the ice again in the afternoon, I had a ton of adrenaline to burn.

But I wasn’t as focused as I was in the morning.

My gaze tracked Damien’s every move. And because of that, I missed a pass from Ethan and got razzed for being slow on the uptake.

At least no one suspected the reason why I was so distracted.

“What do you think of the camp so far?” Dane asked me when we took a breather.

I turned to our captain.

“It’s good. Harder than I expected, but more time on the ice is never a bad thing, right? I’m learning a lot.”

“I think this fall is going to be a banner season for us.”

I nodded. “I feel it too.”

We were halfway through our scrimmage when Damien’s phone rang. He started skating away as he answered it, but he didn’t get far.

“Silas!” Damien called out and motioned for me.

I skated over to the boards and noticed Damien’s tense expression. “What’s up?”

“It’s your brother,” Damien replied and offered me his phone.

A wave of panic washing over me as I frantically pulled my gloves off and reached for the phone.

“Jo?” I answered.

“Sorry to interrupt your practice. I tried your cell but when I couldn’t reach you, I called the office at the rink. Didn’t realize they’d put me directly through to your coach.”

“It’s all right, what’s going on?”

“I had a fainting spell. One moment, I was gathering up the golf balls at the driving range, and the next thing I knew, I woke up in the lounge in the clubhouse with River beside me. Thankfully, he drove me to Burlington General.”

“Shit, are you okay?”

“Still waiting to see a doctor. I’ve been bleeding more than usual, and I went to the bathroom several times today. I think I’m dehydrated. I need you to come down here. River had to head back to work.”

“I’m leaving now. You’re in emergency?”

“Yeah, and thanks. Sorry about this.”

“Stop apologizing, Jo. I’ll be there as fast as I can.”

I hung up and passed the phone back to Damien with a shaky hand.

“I’ve got to get to the hospital,” I stated, my voice hoarse. “Jo passed out at work.”

“Is he going to be okay?”

“I think so. I hope so,” I replied with a sigh. “He has Crohn’s disease. Jo had surgery two years ago and he was doing better, much better. But he started a new medication recently and it seems like it’s not working. Or maybe it’s the side effects? I don’t know.”

“That’s a lot to deal with at his age. Fuck, at any age.” Damien stared at me. “Thanks for telling me. We’re almost done today anyway. Go take care of your brother.”

“Thanks, Damien.”

He nodded. “Of course. Let me know how he’s doing. Text me later.”

“I will.”

I made a beeline for the boards, changed in record time, and was back in my truck on the way to the hospital not ten minutes after Jo called.

My phone buzzed with notifications, and I tried my best to ignore the guilt that threatened to swamp me every time I thought about missing my brother’s call for help.

When I pulled into the hospital parking lot, my phone pinged again.

I tapped on it, assuming it was Josiah. Instead, it was a text from Damien.

Damien: Despite the late start, you did good. Keep it up.

It wasn’t a major endorsement, but I’d take it.