Page 11

CHAPTER ELEVEN

Garret takes me to a secluded spot he found out back by the woods. He spreads the sleeping bag over the ground. “Lie down and test it out.”

“Test what out?” I lie down as instructed.

“The spot. Make sure it’s good.”

“I’m not sure how I would know that until the fireworks start.”

He lies down next to me and stares up at the sky. “It’s good. It’s the perfect spot.”

“How do you know?”

“I just do.” He sits up and grabs the blanket.

“Then why did you ask me?”

“Here. You might need this.” He hands me the blanket.

I toss it aside and pull him closer. “I’d rather have you keep me warm.”

He leans down and puts his lips on mine.

Just as we kiss I hear a crackling noise followed by a loud boom. It startles me and I jerk up, hitting Garret in the head.

“Jade, what the hell?” He rubs his forehead, laughing.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to do that.” I lean up and kiss his forehead. “There. You’re all better now.”

“I don’t think so. I think you just cracked my skull open.”

“I did not.” I watch as he continues to rub his forehead. “Shit! Did I really hurt you? Maybe we should go inside.”

“I’m fine. But you could kiss me again and make it better.”

I give his forehead another kiss, then lie back on the sleeping bag.

“That’s it? It’s going to take a lot more than that to feel better.”

The sky booms again, raining sparks of color over us. “We’ll kiss later. I don’t want to miss the fireworks.”

“That’s true.” He lies down beside me. “You don’t want to miss this.”

Fireworks continue to shoot off and as Garret promised, they’re spectacular. Garret says this is his dad’s favorite holiday so he goes all out on the fireworks every year.

“What do you think?” Garret holds my hand as we gaze up at the colorful sky.

“This is amazing! I’ve never seen fireworks this close up before. As a kid, I just went outside and tried to see if I could spot some in the sky, but I never actually went to see fireworks.”

“Well, now you get your very own show.”

Two big blue and red ones shoot off, followed by a white one that’s in the shape of a star.

“How is your dad able to do this? Aren’t fireworks illegal in this state?”

“My dad has an arrangement with the cops.”

“What kind of—”

He squeezes my hand. “Don’t ask. Just enjoy the fireworks.”

Another Kensington secret that probably involves bribes or blackmail or other things I don’t want to know about.

As I watch the red, white, and blue explosions lighting up the dark sky, Garret turns on his side and kisses my cheek. “I love doing this.”

I keep my eyes on the fireworks. “Doing what?”

“Lying next to a beautiful girl on a warm summer night watching fireworks. I’ve never done this before.”

I flip on my side to face him. “You’ve never watched fireworks with a girl?”

“No. I usually just stand by the pool and watch.”

“Why haven’t you ever brought a girl over?”

“Because normally we have like two hundred people here for the Kensington Fourth of July.”

I glance around at the woods surrounding us. “You could’ve taken her out here and got some privacy.”

“I guess.” He runs his hand down the side of my face, his eyes on mine. “But I didn’t have the right girl to do this with.”

“What do you mean?”

“Holidays are a big deal to me. I’m not going to ask just any girl to watch fireworks with me.” He gives me a soft, sweet kiss, then looks at me and smiles. “It had to be the right girl. And she didn’t show up until last September.” He lies on his back again. “Took you long enough.”

I laugh. “Sorry. If I’d known you were waiting around for me, I would’ve moved to Connecticut a lot sooner.”

Another firework shoots off creating a canopy of red and blue sparks.

He puts his arm out and I snuggle up next to him, my hand on his chest, my eyes aimed up at the sky.

“Garret, if I’d gone to your high school, do you think you would’ve dated me?”

“Probably not.”

I jab him. “Hey! You’re supposed to say you would have.”

“It’s not about me. You’re hot. Of course I would’ve asked you out. But you would’ve said no. You never would’ve dated someone like me. I was messed up in high school. I drank constantly and partied every weekend. You probably wouldn’t have even talked to me.”

“Yeah, I guess.” Another blast of color explodes in the sky. “But then why weren’t you that way when I met you?”

“I sobered up a little over the summer when I was living in DC.”

“Why? Because you didn’t want to lose your internship?”

“I didn’t even want that internship. I didn’t care if they fired me.” He hesitates, then says, “I cut back because Sadie’s not much of a drinker.”

Garret and I try to avoid the topic of Sadie, given that she’s my half sister and he dated her for two months last summer.

“So Sadie got you to stop drinking?”

“I still drank, just not as much. But after she broke up with me, I went back to drinking like I used to. And if I hadn’t met you, I’d still be drinking like that, probably even more than that.”

I’m quiet as I try to imagine what Garret’s life would be like if we’d never met. Would he be drinking every night? Failing in his classes? Getting in trouble all the time?

“Well, sorry I took so long to get here.”

“Thank God you did.” He lifts my hand to his mouth and kisses the inside of my wrist. “I love you.”

I smile. “I love you, too.”

Fireworks start shooting off, one after another.

“Check it out, Jade. The ending’s the best part.”

The sky lights up with color, a continuous stream of red, white, and blue. About a minute later it gets quiet and the sky is left with a smoky haze.

“Wow! That was amazing.” I scoot up so that my face is even with his.

“I told you it was a good show.”

“It was a great show. It’s official. We have now celebrated every holiday together and they were all great.”

“Some of them were better than others.” He lightly rubs my hand as he says it and I know he’s referring to Easter, which we weren’t able to celebrate together. I never asked Garret what he did that day, or any of the days we weren’t together. I don’t want to talk about it. I try not to think about last spring. Both of us do.

“But this year all the holidays will be great,” Garret says.

“Really? Are you already making plans?”

“Not yet. But this year each holiday will be our first holiday together as a married couple so we have to make each one memorable.”

“You like celebrating stuff, don’t you?”

“You got a problem with that?” He kisses me.

“No. I love that about you.” I kiss him back and we keep kissing until Garret pulls away.

“We should probably go back to the house and say goodbye to my grandparents.”

Say goodbye? They didn’t even say hello. That’s what I want to say, but I don’t.

We both get up and I grab the blanket.

“Just leave it.” Garret draws me into him and talks by my ear. “Maybe we’ll come out here later when everyone’s asleep and check out the stars.”

“Check out the stars? Really? That’s all we’d do?”

He laughs and takes my hand, pulling me back toward the house.

When we get to the patio, Garret’s grandparents are standing there like they’re about to leave. They see us coming toward them and Holton takes hold of his wife’s arm, turning her away from us and leading her to the sliding glass door. Garret stops abruptly and watches as they open the door and step inside the house.

“Wait,” Garret calls out. “Aren’t you going to say goodbye?” His comment makes his grandmother stop which forces Holton to stop as well since he’s holding her arm. But neither one of them turns around. Holton gets a firmer grip on his wife’s arm and the two of them walk away.

I see the hurt in Garret’s eyes and on his face. It makes me want to run after Holton and tell him he’s a mean, awful person but I know I can’t do that.

I turn to Garret. “Are you okay?”

He puts his arm around me. “Yeah. I’m good.”

Lilly runs out of the house. She’s in her pajamas. “Did you see the pink ones?”

She’s referring to the pink fireworks that started off the show.

I pick her up because she’s so cute and tiny and I really miss her. “I saw the pink ones. They were pretty.”

“Daddy got them just for me. I like pink.”

Garret laughs. “Yeah, we know.”

Pearce comes out on the patio. “Lilly, honey, you need to get to bed. You were just supposed to say goodnight to them.”

She hugs me. “You want to sleep in my room tonight? I could make my dolls sleep on the floor.”

“I don’t think that would work. I’m kind of big. I need a bigger bed.” I set her down.

“Okay.” She holds her arms up to Garret. “Night, Garret.”

He leans down to hug her. “See ya tomorrow.”

Pearce takes Lilly inside. Garret and I stay out on the patio and take a seat by the pool, enjoying the warm summer evening.

“This is a nice set-up back here. The pool and the lights. I like it. Maybe we could get a pool someday.”

“Jade, I’m a swimmer. We have to have a pool. And I want to teach our kids how to—” He stops, his eyes on the water. “I just think we need a pool.”

I don’t respond. I wasn’t expecting the kid topic to come up and it’s not something I want to discuss right now. I know we should. We’re getting married in a couple weeks and kids should be discussed before we do that. And we have discussed it. Garret knows how I feel and says he’s okay if we don’t have them. But I know he’s not.

“Did you enjoy the fireworks, Jade?” Pearce is standing next to me. I was so deep in thought I didn’t even notice he’d come back out to the patio.

“Yes, they were amazing. I don’t know how you did all that.”

He laughs. “I just wrote a check and let other people do all the work.”

“Well, it was great. I loved it.”

“Mind if I sit out here for a few minutes? I’d like to spend some time with you two before you leave tomorrow.”

Garret pulls out a chair. “Have a seat.”

We start talking but avoid any mention of what happened with Garret’s grandparents. Instead Pearce asks us how we like living in California. We tell him about the town we live in and what we like to do there. There’s a lot to say because Garret doesn’t talk to his dad much.

Then we talk a little about the college we’ll be going to in the fall.

“And school starts after Labor Day?” Pearce asks Garret.

“Yes. The Wednesday after Labor Day. Just like Moorhurst.”

“When are you moving?”

Garret looks at me. “We haven’t decided. The real estate agent said we could move into the beach house the end of August so probably around then.”

“I’d like to come out and visit before the semester starts. I’ve been meaning to fly out there and check out the school but I haven’t had time.”

“You don’t need to check it out, Dad. It’s a good school. You already talked to Kiefer about it and I sent you that information packet they give to parents.”

“Yes, and I read through it, but I would still feel better if I saw it for myself. I want to see the campus and see where you two are going to be living.”

This is strange. Why is Pearce suddenly so interested in us? He’s usually too busy with work to even call us.

“When do you want to come out?” Garret asks.

“Maybe early September, once you’re settled in your new place. I was hoping we could celebrate your birthday while I’m there. I wasn’t sure what your plans were for your actual birthday, but I have a meeting that day in New York so I wouldn’t be able to make it in time anyway.”

“That’s okay. Jade and I will do something.”

Garret doesn’t know it, but I’m already planning his birthday. I special ordered the surfboard he really wants and I’m making him a birthday dinner. I don’t really know how to cook so Sean’s been secretly giving me cooking lessons. We’ve had two so far but I need a lot more than that.

Garret, Pearce, and I hang out on the patio until 1 in the morning, then Garret and I head upstairs to his room but Pearce remains outside. I think he’s still upset about his dad. I feel bad for Pearce, growing up with someone like that for a father. Even now, Holton’s a bad father. And a bad grandfather.

I’ve never seen Holton act like he did tonight. The last time I saw him he was so quiet and reserved. But now I know what he’s really like. It’s another Kensington family secret. Just when I think I know everything about this family, I find out something new. And it’s usually not good.

Aside from the incident with Holton, I had a good time this weekend and as Garret and I are lying in bed, I feel a little sad we’re leaving tomorrow.

“This has been a good trip,” I say, resting my head on his chest.

“It has, hasn’t it? I actually had fun.”

“Same here. Your dad’s been really great and I got to spend lots of time with Lilly. I can’t wait to see her at our wedding. She’ll be so cute with her little basket of flowers.”

“Yeah, she will. And afterward you’ll have a little sister.”

“Well, technically I already have four sisters. Half-sisters at least.” I adjust myself in the bed, pulling the covers up higher.

“Do you ever wish you could tell them who you are?”

“Sometimes I do. It would be nice to have more family but they’d never accept me. When I met Sadie’s mom, she didn’t like me and I’m sure she’d hate me if she knew who I really was.”

“Maybe you could meet your uncle. Have you asked Grace about that?”

“Yes and she said it’s up to me. If I want to meet him, she said she’ll arrange it. But I don’t know if I want to yet.”

“Did Grace decide if she’s coming to the wedding?”

Grace Sinclair, my grandmother, is a billionaire and because of that, she’s kind of well-known, at least among wealthy people. She was hesitant about going to the wedding because if someone found out and told the press, people would question why she was there. But then she realized she could just say she’s friends with the Kensington family, which is true. She’s been seen at social events with them for years and the media knows that Pearce was a big supporter of Royce’s presidential campaign.

“She’ll definitely be at the wedding. I talked to her last week. She invited us to come stay at her house in Santa Barbara. She’ll only be there for a few weeks. She thought maybe we could go there sometime after the wedding, just for a day or two. I told her I’d check with you and get back to her.”

“Jade, you don’t have to check with me. If you want to go, we’ll go.”

“Really? Because I was thinking I’d just go alone. I didn’t think you’d want to go. You don’t really know her that well.”

“I know her well enough. I grew up seeing her at parties. It doesn’t matter. We’ll be married by then and I go where you go. That’s how it works. And I’ll make you go to my family functions.”

“I don’t want us to make each other do stuff we don’t want to do.”

“I’m kidding. You’re not making me go. I want to go. Grace seems like a nice lady and she’s your grandmother. You need to spend time with her. And I want to get to know her better.”

I lift my head up and smile at him. “You know what?”

“What?”

“I’m so ready to marry you. I just want the day to hurry up and get here.”

“And this from the girl who used to freak out whenever I said the word marriage.” He kisses me. “Goodnight. I love you.”

I lay my head back on his chest and secure my arm around him. “I love you, too.”

* * *

The next morning while I’m in the bathroom getting ready, I hear Pearce come into the bedroom. Garret’s in there packing our bags.

“Garret, I want to talk to you before you leave.” Pearce has a deep powerful voice that’s loud even when he’s talking normally. I have the bathroom door closed and I can still hear him perfectly.

“What is it?” I hear Garret ask. “Why are you looking at me that way?”

“Let’s sit down.”

I was just about to go out into the bedroom but decide not to because his dad sounds really serious and I’m afraid to interrupt. So I stay put and try to occupy myself. I try not to listen but I can hear every word through the bathroom door.

“Is something wrong?” Garret asks.

“No, nothing’s wrong. I just need to say something to you.” There’s silence and then I hear Pearce again. “I just want to say that I’m sorry, Garret. I’m sorry for being a bad father to you all these years. For not being there for you after your mother died.”

“Um, okay. But why are you—”

“Let me finish. I need to say this.” There’s silence again and then, “I was selfish. I couldn’t deal with your mother’s death and because of that, I didn’t handle it well. I didn’t handle you well. I tried to force you to move on and not talk about her or even mention her name. But that was all for my sake. And it was wrong.”

“It’s okay, Dad. It was a long time ago.”

“No. It’s not okay. After she died, I should’ve spent time with you. I should’ve supported you and been there for you while you were grieving. But I wasn’t. And so you turned to alcohol, and deep down I knew I was the reason for that but instead of admitting that, I blamed you. I said you were a bad kid. Rebellious. Out of control. But the alcohol was just an outlet for the pain I caused you and the pain of losing your mother. I get that now.”

“Where is this coming from?” Garret asks. “Why are you telling me this?”

“I’ve been seeing someone. A counselor. For several months now actually. Obviously I can’t tell him everything about me or this family. I talk to him mainly about your mother and her death. And you. I didn’t need him to tell me I’ve been a bad father. I knew that already. But I needed to know why. Because I don’t want to be this way, Garret. I want to be the kind of father you and Lilly deserve. You’re a grown man now, so maybe you don’t want that. Maybe you hate me for how I’ve treated you all these years but—”

“I don’t hate you, Dad.”

“Well, I would understand if you did. But if you could give me another chance, I’d like to try to be part of your life again. I know you’re on the other side of the country now but I don’t want the distance to drive us even farther apart. I don’t want to lose you, Garret. I’ll do whatever I can to fix this, make things right between us again. I’d like to have more weekends like we just had. I want you and Jade to come here to the house whenever you’d like and to feel welcome when you do. I’ll deal with Katherine. She won’t be a problem. And I’d like to make some trips out to California this year to see you and Jade.”

“You should come out a few days before the wedding,” Garret says.

“Yes, that’s a good idea.” Pearce laughs a little. “It’s hard to believe my son is getting married in a couple weeks. Next I’ll be a grandfather.”

Garret doesn’t respond. I’m sure he hasn’t told his dad about my fear of having kids.

His dad lets out a long sigh and his serious tone returns. “I also need to say that . . . I love you. I know I’ve never told you that and it’s another thing I regret. It’s difficult for me to say those words because my father never said them to me and I’m sure he never will. But I don’t want to repeat his mistakes.”

“I love you, too, Dad.” It gets quiet and I assume they’re hugging but I’m not sure.

I’m sitting on the floor waiting for them to finish and trying to remain quiet as tears run down my face. It’s one of those stupid crying-because-you’re-happy moments that I can’t stand, but my eyes are doing it anyway because I’m so damn happy Pearce is finally stepping up and being a good father and saying the things Garret so desperately needs to hear.

Pearce doesn’t need to give us a wedding present. This is it. This is the best gift he could’ve given us.